Chapter 30

“Today was really nice maybe we can meet up again in a couple of days xxx”

I debated writing i love you at the end of the text but convinced myself it was far too early to be saying this and i didnt want to scare her off. This was one of the few relationships I had been in and most times I messed things up by jumping in way too quickly and scaring the girl away. I got a reply quicker than i expected

“Yeah it was really good i'm glad things are going well i really like you and want this to work xxx”

I read the text and thought that was a good place to leave the messaging for the moment. It was around 10ish and I needed to sleep while the weed was still affecting me if I had any hope of not having the nightmare reoccur. I laid in bed staring at my ceiling as I thought about the events of the day and how my life had changed in such a short space of time. As I pondered these thoughts I slowly drifted off to sleep and was welcomed by the black embrace of a dreamless slumber. I woke the next morning feeling refreshed i had slept well for once and could only attribute this to the fact i was high when i had fallen asleep it seemed that my conclusion of if i was under the influence of alcohol or even cannabis i wouldn't have the nightmare and this brought me some form of comfort but also filled me with dredd as i wondered if i would ever be able to sleep without either of these to aid me. As I slowly rose from my bed I made my way to the bathroom to shower and relieve myself. As I finished in the bathroom I checked my back and saw that the red marks had begun to fade and didn't look as angry as they had previously. I checked my wrist and there were no marks or even signs that any mark had been present. I got myself dressed in a plain white t-shirt and jeans as I headed down to the kitchen. There was no sign of anyone else in the house. I assumed my sister had gone out to meet her friends and my mum must have gone to work. I headed out to find the usual group with josh. There was no one there aside from emily. As I got closer I could see she had been watching me approach with a smile on her face. i walked up to her and greeted her she replied

"You look pretty high, are you feeling ok ?"

i nodded as i once again found myself looking at her figure i knew that the thought si had were wrong but i couldn't help myself i once again leaned towards her and kissed her cheek she blushed a rose colour spreading through her cheeks as i slowly leaned back and sat on the floor next to her she giggled as she saw what i had felt within my jeans

" Are you a virgin? "

she asked this question with such innocence that it threw me off guard i answered honestly

" yeah i never really fit in with people enough to have even thought about loosing my v-card"

i knew it was a lame phrase but it seemed cool at the time and i knew as soon as i had said it that she didn't think it was so cool she smiled coyly as she then said

"thats cool its kinda my thing i like taking v-cards as you put it"

I instantly felt a rush of blood to my groyne and my cheeks. Was she suggesting what I think she was? i had no idea how to reply to this so i simply stayed quiet and tried to change the conversation

" So what's your plan for the day ? "

she looked at me and stated

" same as always i suppose try and get some alcohol and have a smoke and see where we end up who knows we might get lucky"

as she finished this sentence she winked at me and stood up beckoning for me to follow her. of course i got up and followed her to the small shopping area and stood at the point she motioned for me to wait. About half an hour later she came back with a small bag inside was a bottle of vodka and a bottle of cola. We headed back to her house so she could grab a couple of the disposable cups we had used before. As soon as she had them she came out and led me to a small clearing that was hidden amongst some of the houses. It was like a wild meadow hidden amongst the estate. I was shocked I had explored most of the area yet I had never come across this place. It was peaceful and almost picturesque. I made a mental note of how to reach this area and as we sat down she poured us both a drink. There was a part of me that knew this was wrong. I was in a sort of relationship with Abbey yet I couldn't resist Emily. It was like a force was propelling us together and I wasn't going to go against it. After a few drinks my words started to slur. I really needed to build my tolerance if I was ever going to be considered “Cool” by others but I suppose I had to start somewhere.