Chapter 69 THE FUNERAL
SIANNA'S POV
The funeral was arranged within two days. Mom and Rionna stayed at my house to help me through everything. They made the arrangements and could only accommodate three hundred people at the interment. Pack members sent their condolences and the living room was filled with flowers and gift cards from sympathetic greeters.
It was difficult coping with the sadness in my heart but speaking to our mothers kept me from dwelling on the worst that had already passed. The pain lodged in my heart and it felt like it was permanent. The pack was mourning too and the atmosphere was dull and cloudy. Many of them howled dolefully on the day that they felt their future leader's death.
This day was not one that I could be fully prepared for. Dad with his motivational speech encouraged me to be strong and take it a minute at a time. I was distressed.
Making sure that my make-up concealed my puffy eyes, I added enough make-up to hide how dreadful my appearance had altered from overwhelming stress. I was wearing a black short A-line dress with a high waist and belt with lovely pleats, matched with a necklace of pear shape marquise, round diamonds set within a minimal metal setting, and a round diamond slim bracelet.
Time slipped me as I cared for nothing in the world, but plod down the stairs like a zombie. It was Dad who came over to me to guide my steps to make our exit.
"It will be over soon," He assured me to get through it.
"We ensured that the ceremony would be brief and the pack understands that their Luna needs bed rest," Rionna comforted. Going through the living room door to get into Dad's car, Vance was on the porch waiting impatiently. When I saw him my wolf was thrilled but my spirit was vexed. He was attired all in black for the funeral, looking quite dashing.
"Sianna, I came to pick you up so that we could go to the burial ground together," Vance's pleading eyes meant nothing to me. "I warned you not to come here," I gave him a nasty, stinging look of scorn. "Perhaps I should move to Virgil's pack because it might be a good way to be away from you. Or should I reject you, Alpha!"
He looked at the floor, then to the skies, and sighed heavily before looking back at me. His voice was calm, soft, and earnestly appealing, "Isn't it best for the pack that we go together? I would take you home right after, and leave, I promise."
"It's best that you stay the fuck away from me because you remind me of the reason why I'm in pain, and dressed in black to attend my son's funeral." Not giving him another chance to say anything, I hissed, "Leave now."
Motionless, he stared at me as though his heart was wringing. Mom and Dad said nothing as they stood by my side.
It was Rionna who took Vance by the arm and walked him back to his jeep. "Son, leave her to get enough time to grieve. She will come to you when she's ready."
Reluctantly, in faltering steps, he got into his vehicle. Mom and I got into Dad's Mustang, and Rionna went with Vance to keep him at bay.
Anger and bitterness are what I was feeling. Forgiving my mate won't be simple. Why this series of events had to take place is beyond me. I wanted Vance to understand what he has and will stand to lose so that he protects his family better in the future.
At the cemetery, I did not get out of the vehicle immediately. It took great effort to compose myself. Many people addressed me, "I'm so sorry for your loss, Luna." My Dad's hand hugged me around the shoulder as I repeated the same response. Nodding and uttering thanks. It was getting tiring, and my strength had not fully returned.
Elder Jacob led the processional. Elites Wade and Malik were the pallbearers. The orphanage provided us with four children as flower bearers.
I ordered the casket to be kept closed, no one was allowed to look into it. Vance gave no objects as he was trying to make things right with me. My mood was gloomy, but I was glad that everyone was so supportive.
Vance stood opposite me at the graveside. His eyes never left me. I ignored his presence, though his gaze pierced into me. The cemetery could not hold the entire pack and so Dad hired a cameraman to do a live feed on the pack's social media.
We sang two songs, Mom and Victor Wolverson, gave remarks and Vance did the eulogy. Duke gave a special tribute. Elder Mitchell gave the benediction of the Moon Goddess and rites. The remaining Elders gathered around holding lit candles in their palms to symbolize consolation, warmth, hope, and light through our bereavement.
Tears knew no end, my handkerchief was wet and had makeup smearing. I watched the casket descend into the small hole, which they covered. The exedra headstone was made of marble and granite, with half moons and stars at the borders.
As Elder Jacob did the recessional, for those who wanted to grab the opportunity to express condolences, I stood in my spot so that they would get the chance to say their words. Blayne escorted Cleo and Zoe and fastened by their sides.
Cleo and sweet Zoe embraced me, then said "I know that saying sorry for your loss does not reduce the pain, but if ever you need a listening ear. I'm here."
Blayne nodded in agreement to her statement, I kissed Zoe goodbye and they walked away to give others their time with me.
Naturally, I would expect any pack member to be here to support and express their grief too, but the way that Esme went up to Vance and hugged him in my presence was audacious. I watched how he was managing the matter while gritting my teeth and balling my hands into a fist. Some persons in the crowd murmured about it, which rifled me.
He did not return her hug. So, she let go of his waist but held his hand, brushing her fingers on his chest as she expressed how apologetic she was for our loss. She was rubbing me the wrong way. Carrying on lewdly at my son's burial. As soon as this sadness wanes, I'll deal with her one way or another.
Vance was having a deservedly rough time. I could see that he was not himself, because as she touched and flirted with him, he fixated on me like a robot, without blinking or moving.
Matt sauntered to me with a light tap on the shoulder, rending my attention from Esme, but half distracted by the nostalgic spectacle with Vance and his ex.
"Sianna, I'm so sorry," he hugged me and I tighten the contact. Glaring at Vance as he observed my interaction.
took his cheeks into my hands. "Thank you, Matt," then I hug him again and exceeded the ten seconds threshold for friendliness. I sniffed and leaned my head on his shoulder to get back at Vance for enabling that bitch.
Vance's eyes caught mine and he awkwardly pushed Esme aside before approaching me. This time, I let him remain at my side so that I could drown him with my ferocious glares. He remained silent, his eyes communicated his emotions of sorrow, regret, and longing.
"You came with Wade," I noticed that Matt was very cordial with Wade clinging to his side.
He nodded, half smiling and said, "The mate bond is mystical and magnetic. He's a nice guy and we are hanging out to see if I could ever get comfortable. He's gay but this is new for me."
"Small strides ought to do it. He is so in love with you. Even a fool can see that." I had glanced at them occasionally throughout the burial. Observing those around me as I dealt with my woeful emotions.
I was left alone with my mate, Matt, and Wade who joined us since Mom had gone to talk to some of the pack members in my place and Dad had gone to find her.
"Alpha, Luna," Wade greeted with apologetic eyes.
Managing a smile for the trying couple, I nodded, "I'm alright, healing takes time." Vance intentionally touched my hand so I clasped them together in front of my abdomen to not make my withdrawal visible. His possessive nature was wrestling to break free. Though inside I was revolting and my wolf whimpered. "Thanks for participating in the ceremony."
Matt hugged me one last time and Wade nodded at both of us before departing. Duke, Keisha, and Raj let me know that they were there for me.
I decided to stroll to the car and wait out there for my parents. It was time to head home. Funerals bore too much grief and sadness. It was exhausting to feel so overwhelmed.
Ten feet away from the Mustang, suddenly I felt dizzy and my body was starting to fall when a pair of herculean hands seized me, carrying me bridal style. He opened the car door in the back seat and put me inside to refrain from exertion. Disquieted, he knelt beside me.
Resting my head against the seat, I wished for his departure, but he caressed my cheek and kissed my forehead. I was too lightheaded to stop him and the frustration antagonized me.
"Why don't you let me carry you home? Your body is still weak from the long labor." He held my hands, caressing my fingers. "Then isn't that your fault? Aren't you the one that caused everything to go downhill?" I said, pulling my hands out of his. "I can't look at you."
"Baby, I love you and I'm here for you," he spoke with such tenderness that made my wolf want his touch.
In my lethargic state, I managed to release a hideous chuckle, and placed much bitterness in my tone, "You are three days late in being there for me."
"Sianna, I am so sorry." His voice cracked but I did not turn to look at him. "I would do anything to be with you." He forced himself to speak, "I messed up but we can fix this."
"I'm thinking that we should get a divorce," that should sting him where it hurts. I hit him with a bolt out of the blue.
"What? No!" He strongly opposed, "Don't say things like that."
"If I wasn't there, wouldn't you let Esme be all over you? Isn't that what you do Vance, entertain your whores?" I snapped at him. "Do you know how insulting that was?"
"I am yours, now and forever," he cocked his head to the side to get a better view of my eyes. "I don't give a fuck about them." "Yet our son died because of one of them," I emphasized. This time, my eyes met his. "I get that you had a life before me, but I expected that once we were together, you would know where your priorities lie."
"I do," he defended, "I need you. We need each other."
I shook my head and chose a pessimistic attitude. "I am starting to think that we don't."
Dad and Mom slowly approached the Mustang. Reading the situation, they did not get into the vehicle immediately. Vance said nothing else. Raj, Duke, and Blayne waited for him across the street.
Finally, he erected himself, gave my parents a nod, and walked over to the guys. My parents got into their seats, buckled up, and started the car.
"Honey....." Mom check on me, turning her head to glance at me in the backseat, as Dad drove us home.
"I'm fine, Mom." There was no honesty in what I said, "I handled it."
The stage was set and the dread of going home to where the bad memories lived was frightening.