Intentions are important

What was my name? Where I was? Why were my legs so wobbly? I could only see the sun streaming in through the curtain and the room in a complete zone.

Next to me was Filipe, with a small smile on his face of satisfaction. I wanted to kill him, but I didn't have the strength. Everything was so intense that I had lost control of my body and looked like a "soft Maria".

"Philip, arise." I say shaking him with the little strength I have left.

"What it was?" Filipe turns to me with his eyes closed and kisses my head, but he remains motionless.

"I want to clean myself up". I'm clearer and only then do I see him open his eyes, I understand the situation. "Can go". Speak plain.

I look at Filipe as if the universe was wrong to allow his existence on earth.

"I can't stand on my own, take me." I send a little sullen, taking off the sheet.

Filipe gets up laughing and comes towards me, I could see that he was somewhat pleased to be the one causing my loss of strength.

"You can wipe that smirk off your face." I demand seriously and Filipe continues with that cheeky smile.

Filipe soon puts me in the shower and turns it on. First he wets my hair, while I'm holding on to his waist, and then he starts to apply the soap.

"No silly hands Filipe, that's it for today". I alert, already knowing his ulterior motives.

Filipe raises his hands in surrender and washes my body again. Soon he also takes a shower and we leave the bathroom. I was already better, able to walk on my own and I went straight to brushing my teeth.

"We have to hurry, lunch will start in a few minutes and then we'll start the trail."

"Who chose this activity?" I ask Filipe while combing my hair.

"Probably your little friend." Answer while putting on your underwear.

Taking my focus away for a while, that man in just his underwear was a sight worthy of a museum.

"My little friend is not that athletic so obviously it must have been someone who hates her. Possibly Mel." I speak remembering that poisonous viper.

"Or she just wanted to please Fernando and participate in something he likes." Speaks normally, making light of it, but giving me a very important piece of the puzzle that I am creating in my mind.

Would it be problems? Or it could be what Filipe said, they must be strengthening ties. After all, the two have known each other for a few days and must hardly know each other's flaws.

"Was your cousin always this impulsive or just since meeting Vidia?" I ask again wearing my gym clothes.

I finish getting dressed and realize that silence reigned in the place. I looked back thinking that Filipe had already gone, but no. Filipe stares at me with his eyes fixed on my body and then looked at my lips.

He flashed me a small smile, as if he took satisfaction in seeing my features. Filipe approached me like a hunter and I was far from being a helpless prey, in fact I was waiting for him with great anxiety. He counted his every step and by the time he got to me, I had already lost my temper.

Filipe touched our foreheads, which was something I loved doing. Our breaths were coming together, to the point of being one. Filipe joined our hands and I loved that contact. It was like we forgot all the mess outside and just forced ourselves.

I closed my eyes and enjoyed it. It seemed like a simple gesture, but for me, it made all the difference. Filipe could be somewhere else, doing something else, but he chose to be there. With me. That meant a lot to me. Because there were many people, but he decided to stay there, with me.

"Do you think they were rash?" Filipe asks in a whisper, without moving an inch away from me.

"Do not you think?" I respond with a question

"Before, I would have told you with complete certainty that those two were huge idiots." He says making me laugh.

How could we be so alike? I kept calling Vídia crazy in my head, but now I'm here, with the most unpredictable person in the world agreeing with me.

"But and now?" I ask, curious to hear his answer, since the way he spoke, his opinion had been changed.

"Now I..." Filipe begins to speak now, looking away from my eyes to my lips, and moistens his in a clear sign of desire. "I understand the fact that Fernando wants to marry Vídia and leave her very close to him, and make her write her surname."

Filipe says everything in a whisper, making his voice hoarse and sexy. Why did it have to have that voice? Why did she have to have this irresistible body? Why did you have to have those honey lips? Why in God's name did it have to drive me crazy?

I just watch his words and inevitably carve them into my heart. It was unintentional, it just happened. Could it have been karma for criticizing and calling Vídia crazy? Or would Filioe be the one for me? To take care of me and I take care of him?

"Philip." My voice sounds low and sweet. "Do you realize what you're saying?" I ask and already feel tears form. "When you call me mia, do you mean to use me and treat me like an object?" The tears were already falling down my face and they contained pain in its purest form. "I don't just want to have fun with you, Filipe." I'm clear.

Something that makes people get hurt very easily? They are not clear. You can't play a game if your cards aren't all on the table.

Similarly, you cannot let someone into your heart without first knowing their intentions. It is necessary to be clear, so that when everything happens, you are already prepared.

I wanted that certainty, the certainty that I wasn't looking for hurt anymore. I'm alone and I'm living the best part of my life, why would I risk my happiness? I was decided. I felt strong things for Filipe, but I loved myself and I wouldn't be his "toy".