Chapter 63 SECOND CHANCES BETWEEN BROTHERS
Elias
Elias stared at the phone. James’s on the phone. His thumb hovering over the decline button.
Alex touched his arm. “Answer it.”
“I don’t want to.”
“I know. But maybe it’s time.”
Elias answered. Put it on speaker. “What do you want?”
“To apologize. In person. Can I come over?”
“No.”
“Then can we meet somewhere? Coffee? Five minutes. That’s all I’m asking.”
Elias looked at Alex. Alex nodded.
“Fine. Tomorrow. The café on campus. Noon.”
“Thank you. I’ll be there.”
After hanging up, Elias sat heavily on the couch. “I can’t believe I just agreed to that.”
“You can still cancel.”
“No. You’re right. It’s time. I just don’t know what to say to him.”
“Start with listening. Let him talk. See if he’s really changed.”
The next day, Elias showed up at the café ten minutes late. On purpose. James was already there. Two coffees on the table.
“You remembered how I take it,” Elias said, sitting down.
“Of course. You’re my brother.”
“Are we? Brothers? Because you haven’t acted like it in five years.”
James flinched. “I deserve that. I deserve all of it. What I said when you came out was unforgivable.”
“It was.”
“I was scared. Dad always expected me to be perfect. To set the example. When you came out, I thought it would reflect badly on the family. On me. I was selfish.”
“You were cruel.”
“I know. And I’m sorry. I’ve been in therapy for two years. Working through my own issues. My divorce made me realize how wrong I’d been about everything.”
“Your divorce had nothing to do with me.”
“It had everything to do with me being a terrible person. Sarah left because I was controlling. Because I couldn’t accept anything that didn’t fit my perfect image. Including you.”
Elias sipped his coffee. It tasted like ash. “Why now? Why reach out after all this time?”
“Because I’m tired of being alone. Because I miss you. Because I want to know my brother again.”
“I’m not the same person I was at eighteen.”
“I know. Alex told me you’re happy. That you survived something terrible. I’m proud of you.”
“Don’t. Don’t be proud. You don’t get to be proud after abandoning me.”
“You’re right. I don’t. But I want to earn it back. The right to be proud. The right to be your brother.”
Elias set down his cup. “What do you want from me, James?”
“A chance. Just one chance to prove I’ve changed.”
“And if I say no?”
“Then I respect that. I’ll stay out of your life. Grade Alex fairly. Keep my distance.”
“And Alex? You’re using him to get to me.”
“I’m not. He’s a good student. He’s in my class on merit. But yeah, talking to him helped me understand you better. Understand what you’ve built.”
Elias was quiet. Part of him wanted to walk away. To keep James at a distance. Safe.
But part of him missed having a brother. Missed the person James used to be before everything went wrong.
“One chance,” Elias said. “That’s all you get. You screw up, we’re done. Permanently.”
“I understand.”
“And you don’t talk about me to Alex. Or use him to get information. He’s my partner. Not your spy.”
“Agreed.”
“And you go to family dinners. Explain to Mom and Dad why you’ve been absent. Take responsibility.”
“I can do that.”
They finished their coffee in uncomfortable silence. When Elias left, he felt lighter. And heavier. Both at once.
At home, Alex was waiting. “How was it?”
“Strange. He apologized. Wants a chance to make things right.”
“Are you going to give it to him?”
“I think so. But I’m scared.”
“Of what?”
“That he’ll hurt me again. That he’ll say he’s changed but hasn’t really.”
“Then you’ll deal with it. We’ll deal with it. Together.”
Over the next few weeks, James made an effort. Showed up to family dinners. Talked to their parents. Apologized to them too for being absent.
At school, he treated Alex like any other student. Professional. Fair. No special treatment.
“He’s really trying,” Alex said after class one day.
“I know. I just don’t know if I can forgive him.”
“You don’t have to. Not yet. But you can let him try.”
October came. James invited them to dinner. His apartment. Just the three of them.
“Do we have to go?” Elias asked.
“No. But it might be good. Get to know him again.”
They went. James’s apartment was small. Neat. Books everywhere. So similar to Elias’s it was unsettling.
“I made pasta,” James said. “Hope that’s okay.”
“It’s fine.”
Dinner was awkward. Small talk about work and school. Safe topics. Nothing deep.
But after, when they were cleaning up, James said, “Can I ask you something?”
“What?” Elias asked.
“Are you happy? Really happy?”
“Yes. Why?”
“Because you deserve it. After everything. You deserve to be happy.”
“I am. With Alex. This life. It’s good.”
“I’m glad. And I’m sorry I missed so much of it. The letters. The relationship. The fighting for each other. I wish I’d been there.”
“You weren’t. But you’re here now. That counts for something.”
James’s eyes got wet. “Thank you. For giving me another chance.”
“Don’t make me regret it.”
“I won’t. I promise.”
In the car going home, Alex said, “That went well.”
“Better than expected. He’s really trying.”
“Are you glad we went?”
“Yeah. I think I am.”
November brought Thanksgiving. The whole family together. Including James. First time in five years.
Katie pulled Elias aside. “You’re really doing this? Letting him back in?”
“I’m trying. He seems different.”
“People don’t change, Elias. Not really.”
“Maybe not. But he’s trying. That has to count for something.”
Dinner was good. James told stories about his research. Their father told bad jokes. Their mother fussed over everyone.
It felt normal. Family. The way it used to be.
After, James pulled Elias aside. “Thank you. For including me. I know it wasn’t easy.”
“It wasn’t. But you’re my brother. Even when you’re terrible, you’re still my brother.”
“I’ll do better. I promise.”
December came fast. Alex’s grad school finals. Elias’s work deadlines. Everything busy and stressful.
But on December 20th, James called. “I have news.”
“What?”
“I got offered a position. At a university in Boston. Better pay. Better department. I’m taking it.”
Elias’s stomach dropped. “When?”
“January. After the semester ends.”
“So you’re leaving. Again.”
“Not like before. This time it’s for my career. Not to avoid you. And I’ll visit. Stay in touch. Really stay in touch.”
“Will you?”
“Yes. I promise. You’re my brother. I’m not losing you again.”
After hanging up, Elias told Alex everything.
“How do you feel?” Alex asked.
“Sad, relieved and confused. All of it.”
“You just got him back and now he’s leaving.”
“I know. But maybe it’s better this way. Distance. No pressure. Just brothers who talk sometimes.”
“That sounds healthy.”
“Yeah. It does.”
James’s last class was December 15th. He gave Alex an A. Deserved. Earned.
“You’re a good student,” James told him after. “Elias is lucky to have you.”
“I’m the lucky one.”
“Take care of him. He acts tough but he’s sensitive.”
“I know. I will.”
James left for Boston on January 2nd. Elias helped him pack. Drove him to the airport.
At departures, they stood awkwardly. Not knowing how to say goodbye.
“Thank you,” James said. “For the second chance. For letting me be your brother again.”
“Don’t waste it. Stay in touch this time.”
“I will, every week. I promise.”
They hugged briefly and were uncomfortable. But real.
Elias watched him walk into the terminal. Disappear into the crowd.
“You okay?” Alex asked when he got home.
“Yeah. I think so. It’s weird. Letting him back in. Letting him go. Both at the same time.”
“That’s family. Complicated.”
“Yeah.”
But that night, Elias’s phone rang. Unknown number. He almost didn’t answer.
But something made him.
“Hello?”
“Elias Reed?” A woman’s voice. Official sounding.
“Yes?”
“This is Memorial Hospital in Boston. Your brother James was in a car accident. You’re listed as his emergency contact. You need to come right away.“