23

Chapter 23 part 1 Off It feels like I came back to the time when I was so broken because I found out that Jared's just playing with me. Those are the days when I was already near to getting depressed. Only that, this time, I found out everything, I proved to be true everything Jared said and showed but I had already driven him away, so I was grieving. What can I do now with it? It seems like it's gone, e. I already gave my word. I already chose. I already sacrificed! I will step on a lot of people when I act on what I find out! Is there really no way? I love him and he loves me but I can't! I am already promised to someone else! I can't chase him anymore! I can't do anything but to cry and mourn for the love that I lost. Daphne, Brent, and Aldrin never left my side. I don't know what would happen to me if they didn't sympathize with me. I might have gone completely crazy without them. I don't know how I got through the whole two weeks that I was just in the bedroom and sulking. My friends don't let me be alone there. They took turns watching over me. I don't know if they mommy has any idea what's going on with me. They never visited me inside my room since I caged myself there. "Thank you for favoring our invitation, Phillip, Andreia. If I am not mistaken, our last dinner together was during the engagement party, right?" Si mommy. Tita Andreia laughed but there was something strange in her expression. "Yes, yes. We're so sorry, we're not able to respond to your previous invites for dinner, Daieanah. We're really busy at the firm these past weeks!" Mom laughed heartily. "It's fine. We understand that you two are hardworking couple," "I agree to that," Daddy joked. The elders laughed. Aldrin turned to me next to me now. "Are you okay?" He whispered. I faked a smile. "Don't worry, you'll already be fine after this," This is the first time I laid my foot on the other area of the house other than my room after two weeks. I'm still not well but I need my presence here. It's my mom's birthday and we're having a dinner with the Villacortas. I also want to take this opportunity to divert my attention even just for a while. If I continue to stay in my room I really have no one else to think of but Jared. The type I really want to forget everything but I can't? I just hope being here right now will help. "After all, we're all here, why don't we talk about the wedding? What do you think, Aldrin, Thalia?" Mommy turned to the two of us. I clenched my fists. Aldrin held one of it and squeezed it. "It's still a long way off, Tita. Don't worry," Aldrin said. Everyone was silent. I looked up at them. Aunt Andreia nodded. Tito Phillip is just staring blankly at his glass. I couldn't read my family's expression, though. Dad cleared his throat. "I think we should start eating now? Maybe the food will get cold," The story of the elders also returned after a while. I don't know if I'm the only one who notices but there seems to be something different in the vibe of the Villacortas today. It's like they find this dinner awkward or something. "I have something to tell you tonight, everyone," Aldrin said after the dinner. My forehead creased. I turned to him. 'What?' I mouthed but he just smiled at me. Trembling welled up in my chest for no apparent reason. There is something in his eyes when he looked at me. I couldn't name it. Is it sadness? Curious, I looked at everybody in the room. My family looks like they don't have any idea too of what Aldrin is going to tell us tonight. When I turned to Tita Andreia, she averted her gaze on me. Tito Phillip was just looking at his glasses. I became even more nervous. "What is it, son?" Dad asked casually. I looked at Aldrin again. He took a deep breath. "I want this engagement off." He said without looking at anyone. Chapter 23 part 2 My eyes widened. Did I hear him right? He wants to cancel our engagement? "What did you say, Aldrin?" Dad said in a controlled tone. He did not answer. "Aldrin …" I weakly called. I grabbed his arm but he ignored me. I don't know what to feel about this. I admit, I'm not happy with this arrangement before but I've learned to accept it along the way. Mommy suddenly let go of the cutlery she was holding. "What are you saying, Aldrin ?! I think we heard you wrong. Phillip, Andreia, what is he talking about ?!" I'm just staring at them all now. I was dizzy with what was happening. And Aldrin wouldn't talk to me! I accept if he wants to back off but I hope he will at least say why! Tito Phillip let out a deep sigh and turned to all of us. Tita was still crouched beside him. "You heard my son. He wants to back out to this engagement." Tito Phillip said, calmly but firmly. So, they know this? Mom sneered. Dad held her shoulder. "And? That's just the way it is? You're not going to do anything? He can't back down! That's a violation of the agreement! Do something about it-" "According to our agreement, the kids can back out to this only if we permit them-" "So you allow your son to back out ?!" Tito closed his eyes firmly. "Yes." I looked at Aldrin. He was also clinging firmly. Mom sniggered. "This is bullshit!" "Mommy …" Daph moaned. Dad was just silently calming my mom. I don't know if I should also approach my family now and help them in calming my mom. He's this very hot-headed. I understand her, though. I know he was just shocked so he is like this now. My mom's temper isn't good compared to my dad. I've tried that many times. "Aldrin," Mommy called. Aldrin opened his eyes and tiredly turned to mommy. "What's wrong, son? Why is it suddenly like this? Did you quarrel with my son? Please do talk about it before you decide-" "We understand your feelings, Daieanah, but please, do understand my son's feelings, too. He said he doesn't want to. The conversation is over. And please, understand us, too. You're a parent too. When your son asks you, even What will you do to give that to him. We don't actually agree with this but our only son asked for it. We love him so much that we will grant his every wish even if it's against our will. Because he is our son. How about you? On your daughters? On Thalia? " Tita turned to me. He finally spoke. Chapter 23 part 3 I bowed. "Have you ever asked him if he's happy with this arrangement? Because Aldrin told us he's not happy with this," I bit my lower lip. I think it's my fault. "We, parents only want our children to be happy. My child is not happy here, Daieanah. I cannot tolerate that. What good is it for us parents if we are the ones who cause trouble to our child? Our role as parents is to love our children and not to be the cause of their tears. I hope this is also the view of those two as parents, " There was a moment of silence. "It's our fault. We thought our son is capable of this type of arrangement that's why we agreed to you. But it's already done. We can't do anything now but to apologize to you and your family. Especially to you, Thalia." I looked up at Tita. A lone tear escaped from my eyes not because of the fact that my engagement will be called off but because Tita's words struck me badly. She's right. I just hope my parents realize every bit of her words. Silence dominated us once again until mommy spoke. "Fine! You all don't want this arrangement? Then let's just call it off!" He then quickly left the table. I just closed my eyes. Understand your mother, Thalia. I heard dad sigh. "Thank you for letting us know your side, Phillip, Andreia. I'm sorry for Daieanah," "It's fine, Joseph. We truly understand her. Don't worry, the burden is on us. We won't let your image be ruined when we announce the cancellation of the engagement-" "Excuse me," We all looked at Aldrin as he stood up and then left the table. Even before they could react to what Aldrin did I stood up as well. "Excuse us," I said and followed him. If he doesn't really want to be with me anymore, I won't force him anymore. But I knew I had to apologize to him because I was to blame for why we are like this today. I was too insensitive on his feelings. I only thought of my feelings. Chapter 23 part 4 He was about to get into his car when I caught up with him. "Aldrin!" He turned to me. His lips protruded. I ran towards him. He confronted me immediately. I bowed. "I'm sorry-" My words were cut off when he put his index finger on my lips. "You don't need to apologize, Thalia. All the things you heard were purely lies," My forehead creased. "Huh?" He sighed. "You know how much I've prayed for this to happen. Me, finally getting you after school. So it's really impossible that I'm not happy with you. It's impossible that I wanted to end this now, Thalia." My forehead furrowed even more. "Then why did you …" He sighed again and closed the distance between us. He reached for my hair and combed it in a slow manner as his black orbs bore into mine. I equaled the intensity of his gaze. "I did it for you," He said, almost whispering. "For … me?" He nodded. His hand moved from my hair to my cheek. He gently caressed it with his thumb. "I asked this to my parents because of you. I told them that I'm not happy with you just so they would approve of this. I'm sorry for lying, Thalia." I was even more confused. "But why?" I asked. He stopped caressing my cheek and directed his whole attention to my eyes. "Because I wanted to lessen your burden," I think my brain is malfunctioning right now for it couldn't process what he just said. I did not understand what he said. "What?" He sighed again. "I'm the one who knows best what you're going through right now, Thalia. You're so broken. You're so down right now. And even if you don't say it, I know you're having a harder time because of our situation. So, I decided to end us now. I don't want to add to your problems- " My eyes widened. "Don't say that! You were never a burden to me! Our engagement was never a burden to me!" It's like my heart is being squeezed. I know I've kind of hated our arrangement before but I've learned to appreciate it along the way because Aldrin never failed to make me feel fine. I also admit that I kind of blamed it a week ago for not being able to do something about what I've learned about Jared but I realized that it's wrong to blame it. Now that Aldrin mentions these thoughts of mine before and a week ago, I realized that I was together! "Shh … it's okay, Thalia," I immediately shook. Don't let him insist on that because I can't accept that he thinks of himself as a burden! Chapter 23 part 5 He sighed. "Okay … I'm sorry for that. But please, don't get this wrong. I didn't do it to make you feel guilty or anything. I did what I thought would be good for you." I weakly nodded, hoping that I made Aldrin realize that he isn't a burden. Hell, he will never be a burden to me! I'm still the burden on him, eh! "So you think I'll lose weight now because of this?" I softly asked. He nodded and resumed on brushing my cheek using his thumb. "I don't want to see you hurt, Thalia. But I know it's impossible not to get hurt especially now because Jared is the one in question. So all I can do is to lessen you burden, your pain. To do that is to sacrifice us. I don't want to. that while it hurts for you and Jared, it adds to the thought that you will marry someone else. " A lone tear escaped from my eyes. My heart is aching but at the same time, it hurts so good, too. Fate whips me brutally but I guess, I'm still so lucky. I have someone by my side who's very selfless. "How are you then?" I finally managed to ask. He's right. I needed this one. We will also have a hard time, especially him if we continue this. But, I also know how much he wants us to happen. He himself has said so many times. He let out a deep sigh. "I admit, this whole fucking thing sucks but it needs to be done. For you. So, don't mind me. Maybe this is how life really works. Not everything you want, you get," He smiled sadly . My heart ached again. "Damn, Aldrin …" "Shh … Cheer up, Thalia. Don't feel bad about me. Hopefully, I will be fine, too." Tears gushed from my eyes down to my cheeks. He wiped it immediately using his thumb. He cupped my cheeks. "So don't put my sacrifice into waste, Thalia. Now that you're already free, do everything you can to be fine, to be normal again. Do it for me," I nodded like a kid willing to follow all my brother's command. "How will I do it then?" "You. It's up to you. I'll release you to reduce your problems. But I know at the same time, you can be well again because you can solve your problem. You can … follow him now. You can chase him now, Thalia. Pero sana … huwag na lang, "He laughed but there's no trace of humor in it. Instead there were tears streaming down her cheeks. I was swallowed. I can really … do something about Jared now, right? "You have two options to be fine again, Thalia. It's either you will follow him and get him back or you will move on from him. I know this is selfish but I wish … you will just choose to forget him," My eyes widened. I have no right to be annoyed or angry with his suggestions because I know where he is coming from. "I hope … don't chase him even if you're free. I hope, don't appreciate what you've learned. I hope … just forget about him. But if chasing him is the only way to make you fine again , then I'd accept it. Kahit masakit. " He smiled sadly. My chest tightened. Right now, I'm not sure of what I'm going to do after this. "Because hopefully, if you're already healed, if you've already moved on from him, if you're ready again for someone else, I will pursue you again. The normal way of getting a girl. I'll just make sure that Tito and Tita won't arrange your marriage again, " I laughed while crying. Then I would understand the possibility that they might reconcile me with others. "I'm serious with that one, Thalia. So please … move on instead." I didn't respond. I just stared at him fervently. "You won't go away after this, will you?" I asked after a few seconds of silence. I was just thinking that there would be no Aldrin to support me the next day, my chest was already tightening. He smiled. "We just lost the label, Thalia. I'm not. As what I've said, I will wait for you. I will stay by your side. I will support you, no matter what your decision is." I smiled back and hugged him tightly. He also hugged me tightly back. I closed my eyes and indulged myself in the warmth of his embrace. "Thank you for this, Aldrin." I whispered. He pulled out from our hug and cupped my cheek once again. "Anything for you, Thalia." I stared at his soulful eyes. Those eyes that made my young heart beat into an unfamiliar rhythm. He is the first man to bring butterflies into my stomach, the one who woke my emotionless heart. But all of those were just memories now. My chest tightened. How I wish my heart could just go crazy again over him. I hope he just does it again. For I no longer have difficulty. But my treacherous heart, do not dictate. It seems to have a world of its own. That even if my brain says no, he still does. So now, I don't know what to do. He stared back. I seemed to melt in his gaze. It expresses so much emotions. Nakakalula. He closed his eyes and slowly placed his lips into mine. I froze. My eyes widened as I watched him close his eyes as tears dripped from his eyes. His kiss was soft and gentle. One smack kiss that lasted a bit long. The kiss is full of different emotions. I let him kiss me. I let him pour all his feelings through it. At least this … He then slowly pulled out and groaned. "Damn!" I didn't react, still startled from what he just did. "I need to leave for the meantime, Thal." He turned his back to me and went inside his car. I remained standing. I watched the headlights of Aldrin's car flicker until it gradually narrowed my vision. I sighed after. Now, should I chase Jared? Or should I just leave it here?