Chapter 75
Sienna's pov
You don’t learn lessons without failure, and with Harrison , I’d already learned more than enough.
The baby was a surprise, and for a moment it felt like a thin bandage on a relationship that was already falling apart. I talked about divorce, but as long as we hadn’t taken that final step, I was still giving him another shot, still talking myself into believing he might change.
But my expectations were too small to survive another disappointment.
“It’s fine,” I said, keeping my voice steady by force. “The baby’s gone. I don’t have to worry anymore, and I can finally cut ties with him.”
Luna’s face went pale. She gripped my hand hard, as if letting go would make me disappear. “Sienna, don’t scare me like that. You can have more kids in the future. Besides, you never needed to have a child with a man who doesn’t love you.”
“I know.” I tried to smile, and a tear slid down anyway. “That’s why I’m not that sad.”
But the baby was innocent.
The guilt hit like a bruise spreading under the skin. A small life was gone because I, as a mother, couldn’t keep it safe.
I pulled my hand back and eased myself down again. “I want to sleep a little more. We’ll talk when I wake up.”
Luna had other things to do and left first.
Julian Vane didn’t.
He stayed by the bed, close but not crowding me, watching me with a gentleness that didn’t belong in my life. When he spoke, his voice was low, careful.
“I had someone make food. Vanya just went to get it. Eat something before you sleep. Don’t mess up your stomach.”
I turned my head away, because his gaze felt like warmth I didn’t deserve. Even though I didn’t love him, I still wanted him to care. I still wanted someone to.
‘Don’t push it away.’
“Wake me when Vanya gets back,” I murmured. “I’m tired.”
I closed my eyes. Julian tucked the blanket around my shoulders and stopped there, no extra touch, no pressure. My body sank toward sleep, but hunger kept scraping me awake, a dull ache that wouldn’t let go.
I couldn’t sleep, and I didn’t want to open my eyes and face him, either. Part of me wanted to talk—about the Vane family, the Blackwoods, the feud between them, and how small and pathetic my life felt in the middle of it—but the words wouldn’t come.
“I’m back,” Vanya said when she returned, then quickly softened her voice. “Sienna fell asleep that fast?”
“More sleep is good,” Julian replied. “Give it to me.”
As if I wasn’t awake, listening, starving.
I couldn’t take it anymore. I opened my eyes and pushed myself up slowly, my abdomen pulling with a tender ache that made my breath catch.
“I want to eat something first,” I said.
Julian poured a bowl of soup. I reached for it, but he picked up the spoon instead, blew on a spoonful, and brought it to my mouth.
“Careful,” he said. “It’s hot.”
I froze. The intimacy of it hit me harder than it should have. My pride flickered, then died under exhaustion, and I opened my mouth.
Spoonful by spoonful, warmth slid down my throat and settled in my stomach. Julian didn’t rush me. He watched my face like he was reading the parts I couldn’t say out loud.
He was always gentle—so much gentler than Harrison ever was.
The bowl emptied, and tears came again, quiet at first and then relentless, as if my body had been holding them back all week and finally gave up.
Julian’s voice softened even more. “Hey. Don’t cry. I’m here.”
That was what broke me. My tears spilled faster, hot and uncontrollable. Julian grabbed a wad of tissues and kept wiping them away, steady hands, steady patience.
“Nothing like this will happen again,” he promised. “I’ll always be with you. I won’t let you suffer anymore.”
I couldn’t give him an answer. I could only shake my head, because believing him felt dangerous, and rejecting him felt cruel.
When the tears finally slowed, I lay back down. My eyelids burned. Sleep rolled in heavy and dark, and I let it take me.
Somewhere in the haze, I heard Julian’s voice, so quiet it felt like he was saying it to himself.
“If only I could take you away.”
My chest tightened.
‘Don’t cling.’
Why worry about whether it was genuine? Right now, I was grateful. That had to be enough.
A week passed, and I was able to get out of bed again. Luna told me Agnes still didn’t know about my miscarriage.
“The Blackwoods haven’t reacted at all,” Luna said. “But I’m pretty sure Elena knows. It’s strange she hasn’t done anything.”
I let out a harsh, humorless sound. “Elena doesn’t just want me to miscarry. She wants me dead.”
But what kept gnawing at me was the fake pregnancy.
If it wasn’t Elena, who else would set me up like that? Victor had never taken me seriously, and Classic would never have wanted me married into the Blackwoods. To plant something like that around Harrison, it had to be someone inside the Blackwood circle—or someone strong enough to move against him.
No wonder he believed I would do anything to marry him. On the surface, I looked like the biggest beneficiary, and the evidence was neat enough to make me look guilty no matter what I said.
Whoever planned it was careful. Patient. Deep.
Who could it be?
The Four Titans of the East Coast didn’t seem to have any reason to target me.
Then the thought shifted, slow and sickening.
Maybe it wasn’t meant to target me at all.
Maybe it was aimed at Harrison.
Otherwise, why build something that elaborate?
And if the real target was Harrison, the most likely family to strike would be the Vanes.
Cold crawled up my skin. I didn’t dare follow the logic too far. Five years ago, Julian hadn’t returned to the country yet, so it couldn’t have been him.
But the hostility between Julian and Harrison was blatant, like neither of them cared who saw.
“Sienna,” Luna said, snapping me out of it, “there’s something you need to think about.” Her voice turned sharp, urgent. “Elena deliberately revealed Nora’s death to Agnes . She was trying to hurt her. So you need to figure out how to tell Agnes about the miscarriage. It’s better than letting Elena do it.”
My stomach twisted. I could already see Elena’s face, sweet and sympathetic, while she slid the knife in.
I couldn’t hide the miscarriage for long. And I couldn’t let Elena be the one to tell her.
“I know,” I said. “I’ll find a chance soon.”
But “soon” was how disasters happened. Before my courage could fade, I swung my legs out of bed.
“No,” I corrected, reaching for my clothes. “I’ll tell her now.”
I changed quickly and headed to Agnes’s ward. Julian was there, chatting with her like it was the most natural thing in the world. When he saw me, surprise flickered across his face.
“Had enough rest?” he asked.
He couldn’t mention the miscarriage in front of her, so I just smiled and nodded. “I’ve rested enough. I came to see Grandma.”
Agnes waved a hand. “Why worry about me? You and Luna are always busy. I’m fine on my own.”
I sat beside her bed, meaning to say it clean and fast, but the words stuck. The baby was gone. Agnes would be heartbroken.
But she had to know.
“What’s wrong, Sienna?” Agnes reached for my hand, studying me. “Why do you look so serious? Did something happen?” Her gaze dropped to the back of my hand. “Why is it bruised? Were you sick? Did you have an IV?”
My throat tightened. I drew in a breath and forced the truth out before I could lose my nerve.
“Grandma,” I whispered, “the baby… I had a miscarriage. It was an accident.”
Shame hit me like I’d failed her, like I’d failed something sacred. I lowered my head, bracing for her anger.
But I still added, because I was terrified of what anger might do to her.
“Grandma, please don’t get angry,” I said, my voice cracking. “If you get upset because of me, I… I won’t forgive myself.”