CHAPTER 30. Never again

**— VITA.**

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“Derek!” The Queen Mother’s voice sounds even louder, harsher, as do her eyes, which seem about to set me on fire. Her cheeks are red — so much that I worry the woman might suffer a heart attack. “What’s the meaning of this?”

I quickly disentangle myself from Derek, getting off his lap and trying to fix up my blouse, which attracts her eyes and makes her even angrier.

Queen Mother walks quickly towards us, so fast that the next thing I know, she’s already in front of me, her raised hand coming down to meet my face…

And the slap came so fast that I had no reaction but to blink slowly, feeling the burning in my cheek, my face turned by the impact.

“You wicked, cunning slut!” She shouts, her hand still raised and her eyes as furious as her voice. “You killed my daughter, and here you are, trying to seduce my son? Are you that intent on destroying my family?”

“N-No, it’s not what you think, Queen Mother...” I try to argue, but my voice fails me in the face of her expression of disdain, of pure hatred. After all, what could I say? Even if I said that it was Derek who started this, she would still blame me because that’s exactly what everyone does — they blame me for everything.

“Isn’t that what I think? Then what does it mean? You look like a slut, with your messy hair, your inappropriate clothes... you even smell like a slut!” She says bitterly, and I feel as if the world is opening up on my feet and I’m falling into an abyss... “I saw with my own eyes what you were doing, so you dare call me a liar?”

I lower my head, shaking from the anxiety and shame I feel right now.

“Of course, I should have known that the first thing you would do is get after my son. You always wanted to be his mate, but you weren’t satisfied with that, and you killed my daughter, who did nothing to you!” Queen Mother continues, her voice getting louder and louder. “First, you get your paws on my company, and now you’re trying to seduce my son!”

“Quiet, Mother,” Derek says suddenly, catching my surprised eyes that glisten with emotion. He has his eyebrows furrowed and one hand to his ear. “You’re too loud.”

“Quiet? Loud? How dare you talk to your own mother like that?” She raises her voice, “If you weren’t stupid enough to fall under the spell of a bitch like her, I wouldn’t have to worry so much about you, about the future of our pack!”

Derek’s expression becomes even more rigid, his eyebrows so low that it sends shivers down my spine. The scent that invades my nostrils and stuns me shows me that he’s not satisfied with the Queen Mother’s insults.

He seems about to say something, but a new voice comes into the room, soft and delicate... A voice that sends an intense chill through my chest... something I wish was an illusion... “Sister?”

However, when my eyes reach the room door, my heart skips a beat.

Wanda is entering in a modest dress, her hair perfectly in place. There are tears in her eyes, even though she is trying hard to keep a peaceful expression on her face. Still, I can see sadness all over her face, in the tears contained in her innocent eyes.

“I... I’m sorry, I thought I’d visit Derek, and...” Her voice breaks into a sob, and she purses her lips, looking down at the floor, with a tear running down her cheek. “I’m sorry...”

“Look! Look at what you’ve done!” Queen Mother says between her teeth and abruptly pulls me by the arm, causing a certain pain in the ankle I sprained the other day and didn’t have time to treat properly. “Everything you touch turns to ash! And now, you’re hurting the only person who still had any consideration for you, your own sister!”

My sister? Oh, yes, I considered her a sister, even though we didn’t share the same blood, but now...

“It’s all right, Auntie, I’m fine...”

“No, it’s not okay!” Queen Mother pulls me hard again, dragging me across the room, holding on so tightly to my forearm that it hurts. “That bitch shouldn’t be here… she shouldn’t keep causing chaos around us!”

“Mother,” Derek says firmly, and looks like he wants to get out of bed, but he doesn’t; after all, his wound is still exposed and without any bandages.

I think about saying that, but Wanda is quicker to rush over to him with a desperate expression, saying, “Derek, your wound! Oh, my Goddess, let me help you.”

My eyes meet Derek’s, but his mother breaks our eye contact to abruptly pull me away again and make me twist my foot again.

“How could you bring so much pain to your fiancée, Derek?” She asks in a harsh voice, and I notice that Derek stiffens, but I don’t know if it’s because of his mother’s words or simply because of Wanda’s touch, which is making a new bandage. “You cheated on your fiancée with this despicable woman — your sister’s murderer; how could you do something like that?”

I shake my head, trying to disentangle myself from the Queen Mother’s touch, but she squeezes even tighter...

“Look at me, Derek.” She calls him, and Derek obeys with an almost confused expression. “You have your fiancée, your chosen mate... And on the other side, that wicked woman who killed Alice. Have you forgotten that? Have you forgotten that the woman you were about to have an affair with holds your own sister’s blood on her hands?”

He grits his teeth to the point where the muscle jumps in his beard.

“Choose.” Queen Mother says, surprising me and Derek and Wanda — all three of us look surprised at her, although probably for different reasons. “But choose wisely, Derek, because I still have enough power to talk to the Council and strip you of the title of Alpha!”

“What?” Derek frowns slowly, looking at his mother with a harsh stare.

“I’m telling you, if you choose this wolveless woman over the memory of your sister, you’ll lose everything. I’ll make sure of it.” Queen Mother doesn’t flinch at his gaze...

However, she flinches when Derek raises his voice and says with a growl that comes from deep in his throat, “Don’t you dare threaten me, Mother. I may be your son, but I’m now the Alpha of this pack! And if you threaten my position, we’ll treat your head like a traitor’s.”

She wilts immediately but still holds tightly onto my fist, ensuring that I stay within her reach.

I look at Derek sadly, feeling my chest tighten...

“Derek...” Wanda touches his face, stroking slowly and pulling so that he sees only her. “No matter what you choose, I love you, and I will understand your heart’s desire.”

Watching this scene destroys me.

It really shatters me into a million tiny pieces, almost making me dust in the wind.

“It’s okay.” Derek finally says, holding Wanda’s hand that touches his face and slowly pulling away, bringing an intense chill to my chest.

Then he rests his eyes on me, so deep and intense that they take my breath away.

“I’ll be at the engagement party next month; then we’ll announce the wedding date.”

Derek’s words are like a punch to my chest.

“Hah, great!” Queen Mother gives a relieved laugh, then abruptly pushes me through the door, causing me to trip over my own feet and fall to the floor in the hallway before the eyes of several other people. “Don’t you dare appear in front of me or my family anymore... Seeing you is unpleasant for the eyes.”

And without saying a word, Queen Mother closes the door at me, leaving me slumped, with tears in my eyes and a bruised heart.

But why can’t I just resist? I should have fought harder and stopped Derek from kissing me... But I just allowed it, even though I know he has a fiancée... He’s engaged to my sister! And even so, I let him kiss me... I let him enter my heart and dominate me with his scent... with his intense kiss.

And in the end, things stay the same... He always chooses someone else and turns his back on me. It’s always the same, so why do I still feel so sad? I should expect that.

I can hear my wolf crying deep inside my head. Her little cry makes my heart ache, or maybe it's just the pain that this hell caused me.

*"Mate..."* She whimpers inside my head, inconsolable, so far from my consciousness, refusing to come closer and show herself. This time, it's not because of shyness... she doesn't have the strength for it.

Honestly... I guess it doesn’t matter if Derek is my fated mate; Derek doesn’t know it, or perhaps he knows it and just chose another one, simply like that. It really doesn’t matter.

"You need to accept... he's not our mate anymore," I say low, trying to convince my wolf and me... But my soul is bleeding now — and I’m the one who allowed it to be hurt again.

"I'm sorry for putting us through this pain again... I won't do it, never again...” I say between my teeth, afraid of the sob escaping through my trembling lips, and a tear falls heavily from my eye. “I won’t give our heart to someone else to step on… even if it’s our damn true mate’s feet.”