Chapter 36-1

I TOLD HIM not to wake me. I told him to leave without a word, without strings, without feelings. I told him that it was for the best and that it would make things easier for the both of us. But I didn't thinking that motherfucking asshole would actually listen to me. The one damn time he actually listens and does what I say without fighting back. If he comes back, I swear to all things chocolatey and cheesy that I'm going to kick his ass to a different dimension. When I woke up, he was gone. The side of his bed was cold let me know that he had left earlier than I was expecting. I knew it would hurt but then again I'm a dumb bitch and completely underestimated everything. But nonetheless, I wiped away my tears, hopped out of bed and downed five and a half cups of coffee like a boss. Noah, who was in the kitchen at the time, wanted to admit me to the Guinness World Records because he was genuinely amazed and terrified at the feral velocity in which I downed the coffee. I was happy though because I knew this is what we both needed. Chase needed to explore his own life and possible futures without me. Even though I hated to admit it, our damn strong connection definitely blurred both of our judgement from time to time. Soon, I found myself in a routine of sorts. Swims at the beach, trips to the local farmers market, afternoon naps like the damn granny I am, and then sunset dinners on the back porch of David's beach house. Vera, Sam and adorable baby Stella were over almost everyday which no one was complaining about. Stella was so damn loved by everyone and she had no idea. She can feel it though, she has to. Another regular at the house is Emily. Even though Chase is gone, Emily has been making more appearances in our lives than ever before. She's been getting really close with both Vera and Penn recently which is okay I guess. I'm not going to stop them from being friends with her, I can't do that. But I do get annoyed at the inside jokes they share that Emily purposely brings up everytime I'm around. She's obviously underestimated my ability of not giving a flying fuck. I'm okay with her...for now. But that doesn't mean I'm just going to let it go. I need to keep an eye on her. Call it my bitchy-sense or whatever but in my gut I just know that I can't trust her. I mean, she tried to steal Chase from me. That's a severe violation of girl code. Levi still wants to light her on fire. So some things haven't changed I guess. There's been nights where I just stare at my phone, waiting for Chase to call. I know I told him not to call me but there's still a little part of me that is hoping he does. I wonder if he is thinking about me or if he's going bat-shit crazy like I am. Chase is a reminder of everything I can't control—he's always been like that. Maybe that's why I was initially attracted to him. Or I just have a fucked-up kink for pain and heartbreak. Ma'am, this is a Wendy's. But when I'm with him, I have never felt the need to be in control. He makes me feel safe and comfortable enough to let go. It feels as if whatever shitstorm comes our way, I'd be fine as long as I was with him. Sweet baby Jesus. If that's not the cheesiest thing my two remaining braincells have conjured up, I don't know what is. I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him. And a life without him is no life at all. "I think Hayden's finally snapped." I hear a voice echo around me but I was too deep in thought about Chase. I was always thinking about Chase these days, always wondering about what he was up to. When I was younger, I vowed to not let a guy fry my brain. But here I am; my brain a fucking mushy mess because of Chase Everett. There was another voice, "What? She was perfectly fine this morning." "I think it's because of the lack of Chasey." The other voice continues, "Yeap, she's officially brain-dead. I call dibs on her denim jacket and converse for my Hashtag-Chayden museum." I frown and turn around, "Brain-what?" "AH FUCK!" The two scream as they flinch back simultaneously. Noah was perched on the sofa beside me while Vera was standing in front of him. "Jesus Christ, Hayden." Vera gasps as she puts a hand to her chest, "We really thought you were gone." "Sorry, I was just thinking." I shrug as I run a hand through my hair and sigh out. "You were in a different fucking dimension." Noah chuckles from beside me. His smile then slips from his face, "You didn't...you wouldn't happen to have heard what we were saying right?" "I don't think so..." I shake my head as Noah sighs in relief. I then smirk at him, "But I better be receiving a commission from this museum of yours." "Oh shucks." Noah groans as he tilts his head back while Vera and I chuckle at each other. "How are you?" Vera asks as she steps forward and sits down on the edge of the coffee table in front of me. I nod, "Good." "We just spent five minutes trying to get your attention my darling. That doesn't exactly scream good." Vera smiles as I sigh and droop my shoulders, "I mean, I've got to give you points for lasting this long. How much time has passed?" "3 weeks, six days, fourteen hours, twenty-seven minutes and forty six seconds." Noah explains as he glances at his expensive Rolex on his wrist, "Forty-seven, forty-eight, forty-nine, fifty, fifty-one, fifty-t—" I reach up and pinch his lips shut with my fingers, "I'm fine. Seriously." "He's going to come back, Hay." Vera smiles softly as she reaches forward and grabs my hand, "And even if he doesn't, I'll be going up Seattle myself and dragging his dumbass all the way back here." "Thanks, V." I scoff as I roll my eyes and pull my hand from Noah's lips, "I mean, I miss him but I also miss me, y'know. I need to remind myself of who I am without him." "Please don't. She was a bitch." Noah snorts as I slap his arm and he flinches away, "Ow! I'm just kidding—I swear." "I really wonder if Penn could set a record for the being the quickest woman to become a widow." I grumble as I lift up my fist. Noah, who was visibly shaking, stares at my fist for a solid three silent seconds. Then he shoots to his feet and sprints from the living room screaming. "PENNY! HAYDEN IS TRYING TO MURDER ME AGAIN!" Noah shrieks as Vera and I laugh at him. I shake my head and sag back against the sofa. Vera quickly transports herself from the coffee table to sitting right next to me. She wraps her arms around me and pulls me closer to her. "We're all here for you, Hayden." Vera whispers as I rest my cheek against her shoulder, "You guys will make it through this. You and Chase are fucking stubborn assholes who are perfect for each other." "Is that suppose to be a compliment?" I chuckle lightly. "When the hell do you ever not take something as a compliment?" Vera scoffs as she places a kiss to the top of my hair that was still damp from our earlier swim, "I know I say it a lot, but I'm glad you came into my life Hayden Jones." "Thank you Vera." I hum, feeling my ego inflate severely. Aight, just keep buttering me up. "Even though I act like it, you're the real main character." Vera explains as she pulls my hair back from my face and tucks it behind my ear, "My life has turned out amazing all thanks to you. I'll be with you through thick and walmart-women's section if I loose all my money."