Chapter 64 - Betrayal - mduno
I set the plates of food. It started to rain. I got up from the table, opened the terrace door for D'Artagnan, who came in and ran straight to my room. Every time it rains, he gets very nervous and calms down under my bed. If it starts to thunder, there's no way to get him out of his refuge. Roland smiled as he watched him rush to hide.
"Wow, what a great guardian you have!" Despite my nerves, I laughed at his comment. "The food is delicious."
"I have to be honest, Raúl made it while I was getting ready for you."
He forced a smile, and the pain returned. I forced myself to eat. When we finished, he took the wine and poured a glass for each of us. While he was drinking the wine, he looked at his watch. I stroked the back of his hand.
"It's very good."
You need to talk, you've always liked honesty and clearing things up when they're not going well in any part of your life. What are you afraid of? What are you scared of?
"I need to talk to you before you go, Roland."
I got up and went to the living room furniture. He reluctantly got up and sat next to me.
"What's wrong?"
"Don't start again." The rain was pouring down, and he crossed his arms.
"Don't start what?" I changed my position to face him. "Roland, why haven't you wanted to touch me?"
"I'm afraid of hurting you."
"Liar!" I retorted.
"You know very well that I'm not lying." He started fiddling with his phone.
"You don't want to be here, do you?" He rolled his eyes.
"It's not that, Verónica. I have a very important commitment, and I don't want to be late." A lump formed in my throat.
"That's how I feel, Roland." Hold back the urge to cry.
"What can I do to prove to you for the umpteenth time that you're incredibly important in my life?"
"Kiss me."
It was the only thing that came to mind. For a moment, he hesitated. He pulled me close, and his lips took over mine. Just like before, he tightened his grip on my waist. Instinctively, I sat on his lap.
"Sweetheart..."
I kept kissing him, pressing my pelvis against him. The idea was to brush against his member, and he reacted, tensing under my initiative. I unbuttoned my trench coat, and his eyes sparkled at the sight of my body under a transparent layer. I let it fall to the floor. I moved closer, took his hand, and guided it to my breasts, but before he could touch me, he stood up, leaving me aside.
"What's wrong?" Did he just reject me?
"For God's sake, don't act like a prostitute at this point!"
I couldn't say anything. My heart shrank; I thought it would disappear from my chest.
"We'll talk tomorrow."
Words failed me. He left the apartment, and as I tried to process what had happened, I was left frozen. I didn't know if the cold was from being almost naked in the living room or because somehow my body had stopped functioning. The tears took a while to come.
Did I just get sexually rejected by a man used to having sex daily? There's no doubt anymore, he doesn't love me. Jesus, help me... On autopilot and in a state of sleepwalking, I reached the bedroom and changed my clothes.
While doing so, the mirror showed one of the reasons why he might not like me anymore. An unpleasant scar under my breast that runs to my back. He likes women with spectacular, voluptuous bodies and perfect skin, and now I don't have a pleasant body. I looked at myself in the mirror.
"Fix this once and for all, Verónica." I told that woman on the brink of the abyss. "Clarify things once and for all, for both of you."
I wiped away the tears, finished dressing, grabbed the car keys, the apartment keys, and went to find Roland at his house. If he wasn't there, I'd wait for him. The relationship would either get fixed or end. But I wouldn't allow him to stay with me out of pity.
The traffic, as usual on a Saturday, was heavy, and with the torrential downpour falling on the city, the jam was monumental despite it being past nine at night. The usual travel time was nothing, but with this, it took me over half an hour. Felipe, one of his house employees, opened the gate with a smile.
"Is Roland here?"
He came out of his booth wearing a raincoat. I hadn't seen it rain like this in Bogotá for a long time, and the night was extremely cold.
"Yes, miss, come in."
"Thank you."
I closed the window, parked the car next to his incredible Audi. I walked as fast as I could to the entrance of his house, the rain hitting my face like needles. I took the key he had given me, which I kept with my own.
I didn't know what was better in life, especially in a relationship. The door hadn't even closed when I discovered why Roland had lost interest in me. Simon came into the living room intending to warn him, but I arrived first and saw Beatriz kissing him on the neck.
Everything spun around, and the eyes of the man who was my boyfriend locked onto mine. I couldn't see anything in him; tears flooded my eyes. I turned around and left his house. He caught up with me on the terrace.
"Veronica, what are you doing here?" I opened my mouth. "This cold will harm you!"
"No Roland, the cold won't harm me, you already did that." He crossed his arms with his jaw clenched. "Deep down, there was always that little fear that you'd get bored of me at any moment."
"What are you talking about?"
I looked at him, and tears fell despite my efforts to hold them back. I wiped them away. He remained still, arms crossed, with his stupid arrogance.
"Not more than a couple of hours ago, you rejected me, but with her... That's enough proof for me."
"Where are you going with this?" His face was expressionless; his attitude hurt me even more.
"You've always been honest." I wiped my tears again. "What did it cost you to continue being honest this time? Was it so hard to say we were over?"
"Veronica... we'll talk tomorrow." I opened my mouth. "I'm busy." He ran a hand over his mouth. "Go home, and we'll clear things up tomorrow."
"It's not necessary. You brought her to your house, that means something in your life, Roland. It's fine."
Walk away with as much dignity as possible. Don't show him how you really feel and how much you want to drag that stupid girl away!
"Stop talking nonsense and go to the apartment. We'll talk tomorrow!"
I kept looking at him. He raised one of his eyebrows while I silently screamed, "Why did you do this?" My lip trembled. I was about to speak, but he went back inside his house and closed the door. He left me standing at his doorstep; he chose her.
For the first time in my life, I felt an intense pain in my chest, my hands trembled. I think the walk from the terrace to the car was endless. I forced myself to take one step after another.
Raul arrived with Onion, and when he saw me, I ran into his arms. He got out of the car and hugged me tightly. I saw his boyfriend talking on the phone and heard him say,
"Yes, sir."
"Get me out of here, Skinny."
I was getting soaked. My friend put me in the back of the car and stayed with me.
Onion started the car. I couldn't understand what was happening. When your life changes suddenly, you remain in a transitional state of drowsiness for a while. You try to organize the world, which, as if by magic, exploded in your face. In no time, we arrived at the apartment parking lot.
"What happened, Vero?"
I didn't speak. Being betrayed is the worst thing you can do to a human being. He just had to say, "I don't love you anymore." Or that my body no longer pleased him, not make me look like a fool.
"What did that jerk do to you?" I wiped my nose with the back of my hand.
"Leave me alone, I want to be alone, we'll talk tomorrow." I stood by the door.
"I'm not leaving you alone." He crossed his arms.
"Please, Skinny. I'll be fine."
Reluctantly, he left the apartment.
"If you change your mind..."
"I'll call you." He kissed my forehead.
"I know you won't listen to me, he doesn't deserve you, you're too much for him, and I bet he got scared, like someone else I know."
I didn't argue, it wasn't that. He simply didn't like me anymore, he had turned the page with me.
"I'll be fine, nothing happened after all. I just want to be alone."
"I'll come by tomorrow."
"Okay."
I closed the door. I sat on the couch, hugged a pillow, and for more than an hour, I let myself be carried away by my feelings. I didn't care that I was wet. Roland's betrayal hurt too much.
How foolish I was to think I could change a man like him. No one changes anyone. Only oneself can make that act of transcendence. I have prayed to God for his soul since I met him, I have prayed for him at every mass.
It was in vain. Forgive me, God, for giving you that task. He will never change, and I will never give in to infidelity. No matter how much it hurts my soul. He said we would talk tomorrow, but that tomorrow will never come. I won't give him the pleasure of offending me once more.