I stay quiet for the rest of the car ride home. I SHOULD be asking Lukas what he found out tonight. I should be using this time to process everything, to go over the details, to figure out our next steps. But I can’t shake the feeling that Lukas is… Disappointed in me. And I have no idea why. I mean, OF COURSE I don’t know what he’s thinking. That’s HIS magic, not mine. But he knows that. And he’s not unreasonable. He can’t be expecting me to know his every thought. Which means whatever he was asking me about back there, whatever he wanted me to understand, it was something more specific. Something I was supposed to pick up on but didn’t. Ugh. It feels completely unfair of him to expect something like that from me when I’m this exhausted. I just spent half the night being relentlessly hit on by a creep while simultaneously being reduced to the prize in a childish game of male ego tug of war. It was beyond draining. Now? I just want to go home, take a shower, and pretend none of it happened. We finally pull up to my place, and Lukas immediately heads inside to take Roxy out for a few minutes. I take the opportunity to escape to the bathroom, stripping off the dress and stepping under the warm spray of the shower. The instant the water hits my skin, I let out a deep sigh, tension melting from my shoulders. I needed this. By the time I’m done, I feel significantly more human. I remove my makeup, change into my softest pajamas, and wrap myself in my dressing gown. I’m not even cold anymore, but I feel the need for extra comfort. Apparently, I’m not the only one who thinks so, because the moment I settle onto the couch beside Lukas, Princess jumps up and curls into my lap, tucking herself against me like a warm, purring security blanket. I stroke her fur absentmindedly, my eyes flickering over to Lukas. He looks relaxed, but there’s still something lingering in his expression. A subtle frustration that hasn’t quite faded. His tie is gone, the top buttons of his shirt undone, a clear sign that he’s trying to unwind. The pink tie is carefully draped over the coffee table, like he didn’t just toss it aside but actually carefully placed it there. Something awkward hangs between us, unspoken. And I don’t know how to fix it. So I do the first thing that comes to mind. I offer him a compliment, it’s people pleasing basics. When people are unhappy, say something nice to them.
“You know…” I say hesitantly, still stroking Princess’s fur.
“I know you don’t love colours, but… You looked really nice in the pink tie tonight.” I shift slightly, avoiding his gaze.
“I know you basically wore it to make me happy, and… I really appreciate that.” I say awkwardly, not looking at him. Lukas goes still. I risk a glance at him and find him watching me speculatively, like he’s considering something.
“It was for you.” He says simply. Then, after a beat, he continues.
“I like it when you’re happy. You know that, right?” He says softly. I nod, suddenly unable to find words. He watches me for another moment, then smiles. And just like that, whatever had been bothering him is gone. Completely erased, like it had never been there in the first place. He reaches out, hooks an arm around me, and pulls me against his side in a warm, easy hug.
“Good.” He murmurs, his voice firm. And just like that, everything feels okay again.
“So.” I begin, shifting slightly as I settle against him.
“We should probably talk about what you learned tonight. You did learn something, right?” I confirm. Lukas nods.
“Yeah. I learned something. Mostly in that last five minutes, but it was a lot.” He says, apparently pleased with what he learned. At least I think he is. Hmm… Should I… Move so I can actually see his face while we talk? I don’t have the cheat code ability to read his thoughts, and clearly, I’m missing things. Maybe that’s because half our conversations happen while I’m multitasking, walking, moving, not actually watching him. Or because so many of them are one-sided, with him responding to my thoughts without me even having to say them out loud. I should move. That would be the logical thing to do. But I’m comfortable. And I don’t want to disturb Princess, who is currently curled up on my lap, radiating the kind of warmth and stability that I desperately need right now. Before I can come to a decision, Lukas decides for me. Without a word, he slips a hand under my thighs near my knees and lifts me effortlessly, shifting me until I’m sitting sideways across his lap. I let out a startled sound, but he doesn’t bother Princess at all. One of his arms stays wrapped around my waist, supporting my back, while the other rests casually against my knee. He angles himself slightly, adjusting so he can see my face more clearly.
“Better?” He asks. I hesitate, considering. I mean, I can see his face now. This is kind of a weird way to be sitting, but… It’s not that different from before, right? I’ve sat on his lap before when we were putting on a show for my parents. And we hug all the time. This isn’t really any different… Right? Why do I even feel the need to justify this? Lukas is clearly fine with it. And logically, there’s no reason why I shouldn’t be sitting here. Right?
“Hey, Clare.” Lukas squeezes my waist lightly, pulling me out of my thoughts.
“Hm?” I glance back at him, still distracted. Our faces are a lot closer than I realised. I blink in surprise, my breath catching slightly at the sudden proximity. His gaze flickers over my face, searching for something, but I don’t have time to figure it out. Because before I can react, Lukas leans in, closing the distance between us in a single smooth motion, and presses his lips to mine. For half a second, my mind goes blank. Everything else, my anxious thoughts, the tension, the confusion, it all vanishes. Lukas is warm, steady, and completely unrushed, his lips moving against mine with a quiet certainty that catches me completely off guard. He doesn’t push. Doesn’t demand. Just waits, giving me time, giving me space, giving me the chance to decide if I want to stay in this moment or pull away. And it’s like I don’t have to decide at all, I just kiss him back. The second I do, something shifts. Lukas tightens his arm around my waist, fingers pressing into the small of my back as he pulls me closer, as if he’s been waiting for this. His free hand lifts, fingertips grazing my jaw in a featherlight touch, tilting my face toward him just enough to deepen the kiss. A warmth spreads through me, curling at the base of my spine and trailing up my arms in a pleasant shiver. Lukas isn’t rushed, he’s not desperate. Just deliberate. I don’t know how long the kiss lasts. A minute? Ten? Time completely loses meaning, swallowed up by the moment and the feeling of his lips against mine. He doesn’t take it further, like this, just this, is enough. And it is. By the time he finally pulls back, I’m thoroughly dazed, my mind still trying to catch up with my body. Lukas watches me, his expression soft but amused.
“You know, you think too much sometimes.” He murmurs, voice lower than before. I blink, still struggling to form a coherent thought. He smiles, brushing his fingers lightly against my waist.
“You don’t need to give yourself permission for every little thing, Clare. If there’s something you want, you don’t have to overthink it. If there’s something you don’t want, all you have to do is say no.” He says firmly. It takes me an embarrassingly long time to process the words. He’s telling me… What, exactly? Lukas lets out a quiet laugh, his grip on my waist firm but gentle.
“Just do what you want to do, Clare.” His voice is warm, steady, certain.
“And I’ll be here while you figure out what that is.”