Chapter 16

"Is it so bad that I love it when he looks at me...is it so bad that I want him to just hold me and tell me how beautiful I am...is it so bad that I want a life with him?"

"I love Xavier."

These words ran through Miguel's head, he tried to shake it off, Xavier has to die for taking away the woman he had ever loved.

He had spent his whole life loving just her, why... just why?

"Having you in my life is a blessing to me."

She had once said those words to him. He recalled those times he had seen her smile and the look on her face when she had said she wouldn't let go of Xavier.

If he pulls this trigger, she would be free but broken.

Would he be able to live with that? Would he be able to stand her desolate face? Would he be able to look at her and not feel any guilt?

Truth always has its way of prevailing, he was already scared she would hate him for killing someone before, would hate to be able enough to describe the feeling that would consume her if she found out he killed Xavier...the only man she loves.

His hand fell to his side and he leaned against the wall taking off his mask.

He knew she had no chance of having a life with Xavier. Isobel would make sure she leaves him.

He shouldn't turn into a beast, but it hurts...it hurts so damn much as he thought about their times together, tears rolled down his cheeks, he clamped his hand over his mouth.

This pain would pass, he should let her enjoy the short time she has with Xavier and he'll be waiting to take his rightful place in her heart when things would fall apart for her.

Amanda smiled seeing the man who always managed to turn her world upside down with just a kiss...a touch...a slight caress.

Xavier handed her small bag.

"I was at Da Silva's chocolate today and I got a lot for you” He said sitting beside her.

"Thank you” She replied excitedly and brought out a pack of chocolate.

"This is good” She commented as soon as she started devouring them.

"I'm glad you like them” He said suddenly feeling so proud of his chocolate company.

He moved closer to her and wiped off some particles of chocolate from the side of her lips.

"I wonder where all the food you eat go to” He said, eyes running through her slender body.

Amanda chuckled. “Do you want me to get fat?"

"Fat or slim, as long as you're happy, I'll be okay with it"

Her heart flutter warmly. Their eyes locked and those beautiful eyes of hers made his breath caught.

"Vorrei annegare nei tuoi (I want to drown in your eyes).”

He held her chin framing her face in her hands and then he bent his head until his lips grazed hers.

"Sei bellisimo (You are beautiful).”

A sensual longing sparked in the depths of her eyes. Unable to resist the hunger ripping at him, he closed his mouth over hers.

His kiss felt tentative, gentle, tender, yet when she returned the kiss, passion rose of the surface and hunger flooded her.

His hands trailed over her shoulders and down her back, he pulled her closer.

A small groan of pleasure rumbled from his throat; his breath ragged as he eased his lips from hers.

"Let's stop here” He announced.

"Why?” She bit her lower lip hard at how easily that came out from her mouth.

He smiled and her insides warmed.

"I thought you still weren't ready for me but if you don't want us to stop, we don't have to” He held her hand pulling her from the couch.

"How about after dinner?” He asked.

"I'm not hungry, are you?” She asked unable the stand the heat between her legs.

Whoa! If she could reject food for this then she was really ready for him. And he was hungry for her.

In what felt like seconds, they were kissing passionately into his bedroom. The kiss turned hot... desperate...needy and made her heart pound with excitement.

She raked her hands down his chest and reached for shirt, easing open the buttons until she could peel back and feel his bare chest. God! his skin felt heavenly ...his chest broad was packed with muscles.

He planted kisses along her throat and neck, nibbled at her ear, whispered a sound of male desire, spiking her own fever.

She tugged off his shirt, revealing broad shoulders muscular arms and impressive torso.

Amanda dropped kisses along his chest, her fingers dancing across it in a sensuous parade that made him suck in his breath.

"Bambino(baby)"He murmured as he took off her shirt and bra, then he kissed her neck again as one hand cupped her breasts. Her nipples budded beneath his touch, aching for more.

Seconds later, their touches turned frantic, passionate and he pulled off her skirt. He hurriedly freed himself from his trousers.

The sight of his nearly naked body stole her breath. Hunger for him triggered a desperation that she'd never felt before. She laid back shutting every other disturbing thought from her mind.

His hand encircled her, and his lips nuzzled her neck. When Xavier's mouth burned a part down to her breasts and touched the rosy tip with his tongue, she gasped and arched against him, her hips ungracefully banging against his.

A low deep sensuous chuckle welled out of Xavier's throat as his teeth nipped a little too hard on her nipple at the same time kneading the other.

"Uhmm!"She moaned loving his assault on her breasts.

He moved down and tugged down her panties, opening her legs, he gazed down at her wet feminine folds. Appreciatively, he ran his hand through her body. “Sei il mio tesoro"(You're my treasure)

Gasping, eyes wide, Amanda felt him slid a finger into her body, she began to tremble, scared of this new experience, frightened of what was happening to her...or what her body and mind was feeling.

His finger moved, stroking her ever so slowly, making her part her legs more and more widely.

Needing to taste her, he bent his head and his mouth closed over her heat.

"Xavier” She whimpered as his tongue speared her deeply.

Amanda dug her fingers into his hair and murmured a soft" Yes."

Her body quivered as he teased and tormented her. His tongue flicked her clit continuously and when he lifted up her hips to taste her sweetness, she cried out his name and came with a fierceness that almost sent him over the edge.

He grew more aroused knowing what he was doing to her. He let her ride the wave of pleasure, his own spiked by the sound of her whispering his name.

He tugged off his briefs and smoothed a loving hand on her hair.

"Are you okay?"

She nodded though her body clenched minutely. She slipped her hand down to stroke him, and mindless sensation ripped through him. Her mind balked at his length and thickness.

"Let me dictate the pace, but it'll hurt,” He said staring into her eyes.

Speechlessly, she opened her legs and then he started sliding in, so... slowly and carefully that she could see beads of sweat on his brows.

She gripped his arm as he entered her...inch by inch.

"Arhh... Xa...vier," She cried out, tears blinding her vision.

He kissed her tears away then her mouth.

"I'm sorry, Bambino. It won't hurt like this again," He assured.

He held himself still... filling her... resting... allowing the sensation to flow from one body to another until Amanda...eager... inexperienced began to move, jerkily, ineptly.

Xavier's hands cupped her buttocks and guided her... moving her in a fluid... slow motion... rhythmically... easily with each stroke... pushing her higher and higher in her pain-pleasure.

He stroked her over and over, his blood was on fire. The moment he felt her body clenched around his, his own release was imminent, but he prolonged the pleasure as long as he could, easing out of her and thrusting inside her warmth again and again. Finally, he lifted her hips to angle her so he could drive himself deeper until he filled her and she cried out again with another orgasm.

Her body trembled and quaked, shivered until her strength turned to jelly.

He came then... swiftly and intensely.

Sticky... horribly weak...she clung to Xavier letting herself feel all of his hot skin...his breath...uneven in her ear, his lips pressed to her neck.

"I love you” He whispered and undefinable emotions ripped through her.

"Let's say he really does love you, but to him, who does he think he loves, is it Amanda or Alisha? What does he call you?"

"I'll tell him the truth soon"

"And you think he'll still want you."

As these words ran through her head, tears spilled from her eyes... sliding sideways... touching the bed.

She was only trying to act confident that she could fight for this but deep down she was scared that at the end, she'd end up being shattered.