Chapter 104 Hide evidence

Chapter 104 Hide evidence
Talia POV

She's right. That's exactly what it earned me…heartbreak.

"I told Marcus his past doesn't excuse how he treated me," I say, my voice harder now. "I mean, we're all scared of something, right? But that's not an excuse to treat people like they don't matter."

Bailey nods, waiting.

"He agreed with me," I continue, almost laughing at the absurdity.

“ Can you imagine it? He just stood there and agreed.

He said I was right, that he was scared and selfish and didn't know how to be the man I deserved."

I pause, grabbing the wine bottle again.

"He finally said that he  wanted to try. That he wanted to learn how to be the man I deserve.”

This time, I actually chuckle because coming from Marcus…the same man I know…it's close to unbelievable.

The wine burns going down but I don't care.

Bailey is watching me with those careful eyes, the ones that see too much.

"I gave him one date," I blurt out, and God, I can hear the shame coating every word.

“ I agreed to one date to prove he is serious.

If he screws it up, I'm done for good." I declare.

There. I said it.

So now, she can  go ahead and tell me I'm an idiot and I won't refute.

Bailey however just sits there, nodding slowly like this makes perfect sense.

"Okay," she says and I stare at her. I almost glare at her but stop myself.

"Okay? That's it?" I ask, my voice rising. "You're not going to tell me I am making a huge mistake? That I'm being a complete fool?"

That's what I expected to hear because deep down I know hearing that might make me feel better.

"Do you believe you are making a big mistake?" Bailey asks, and there's no judgment in her voice.

All I can feel is just genuine curiosity.

"I don't know!" I reply honestly, frustrating bleeding into my words.

"That's the whole problem, Bailey. Part of me knows I'm being a complete idiot. That Marcus is just going to break my heart again and I'll have no one to blame but myself." I reveal.

"What about the other part?" Bailey probes and I hate that she knows there's another part.

"The other part..." I trail off, feeling tears prick my eyes again. "The other part keeps thinking about you and Orion. How you almost lost each other. How you both had to be brave and vulnerable and trust each other even when it was terrifying."

I confess amidst my silent tears. I look at Bailey, letting her see what I am feeling reflected in my eyes.

"I keep wondering if maybe Marcus and I could have that too. If maybe this is our chance to start over and actually do it right this time." I continue.

Bailey goes quiet for a long moment. “ Can I tell you something?" She asks when she finally opens her mouth.

"Please." I agree because I fucking need someone to make sense of this for me.

"When Orion and I started our fake relationship, I was terrified," she says softly.

“ At first, it was okay until he started caring too much and I started softening for him.

I was scared he would realize I was falling for him. 

I was also scared that when it ended, I'd be left with a broken heart and nowhere to hide." Bailey points out and jogging my memory, I can actually remember myself encouraging her back then.

"You did it anyway." I point out.

“ I did it anyway," she agrees. "Because the possibility of something real with him was worth the risk."

She reaches over and takes my hand.

"I'm not going to lie to you, Talia. It was terrifying. There were moments I was convinced I'd made the worst mistake of my life.

There were moments I was sure I was going to lose him." She continues.

"But you didn't."

"Because we fought for each other," Bailey says. "We were honest. We chose each other even when it was hard." She explains.

"Marcus and I aren't you and Orion," I point out that obvious point and it comes out more bitter than I intended.

"No,we are not." Bailey agrees easily. "You're not.m too but that doesn't mean you can't have something real. Something worth fighting for." She pauses.

"If he is willing to actually fight this time and if you're willing to let him." She finishes.

I take another drink because I don't know what else to do with my hands.

"I'm terrified," I confess in a whisper.

“ I am scared of hoping again and getting that hope crushed."

That would leave me paralysed.

"You should be terrified," Bailey says, and there's something fierce in her expression. "Hope is scary and so is being vulnerable.” 

“Giving someone the power to hurt you…that's the scariest thing in the world."

"Then why do it?" I ask, feeling trapped by such a dilemma.

"Do you know what's scarier?" Bailey leans forward. "It's spending the rest of your life wondering 'what if.' Wondering if Marcus really could have changed. If you really could have had something real. If you gave up on something amazing because you were too scared to take the risk." Bailey explains and damn her for making sense.

"So you think I should give him a chance?” I ask.

"I think you already did when you said yes to the date," Bailey points out. "Now the question is whether you're going into it with an open mind or sabotaging it before it starts." Bailey continues.

"I'm not going to sabotage it," I protest.

Bailey raises an eyebrow. "Aren't you? Talia, you're already calling yourself a fool. You're already preparing for him to disappoint you. You're already building those walls." She points out and I feel exposed.

"I'm protecting myself." I try to argue or is it to reason?

"I know." Bailey’s voice softens. 

“I  get it. But if you go into this expecting him to fail, he probably will. Not because he is not trying, but because you won't let yourself see it."

I hate that she is right about that.

"So what am I supposed to do?" My voice cracks. "Am I supposed to just trust him blindly after everything?" I ask and Bailey shakes her head.

"No," Bailey says firmly. "Give him a fair chance. That's what you are going to do.” She instructs me.

“Watch his actions, not his words.

If he shows up then maybe let your guard down."

"If he doesn't?"

I can feel my doubt snaking all over.

"Then you walk away knowing you gave him a real shot and he blew it," Bailey says.

“ If that happens, I'll help you move on and find someone who actually deserves you."

She squeezes my hand.

"But you need to give him the chance to prove he's changed."

I set down the wine bottle and lean my head on her shoulder, suddenly exhausted.

"When did you get so wise?"

"When I almost lost the love of my life because I was too scared to be honest," Bailey says. "When I realized that the things that scare us most are usually the things most worth doing."

We sit like that for a while, me sipping my wine and bailey whatever it is she has been drinking.

"You know, on that date day, I'm helping you get ready," Bailey declares. "We are finding the perfect outfit, doing your hair and makeup and making you feel like the goddess you are."

"You don't have to…"

"Yes, I do.” Bailey refutes, cutting me off.

Because you're my best friend and I love you." She grins. "And also because if this works out, I want bragging rights."

Despite everything, I laugh.

"Thank you for not telling me I'm an idiot." I say, feeling genuinely grateful.

"You're not an idiot," Bailey says. "You're someone willing to risk it all for love. That's not being stupid. At least I don't think it is.”

"Even if it ends badly?" I ask and Bailey smiles.

"Even then. At least you'll know you tried."

She stands, taking the wine bottle with her.

"Now drink some water, eat something, and get some sleep. Friday, you're putting on your best dress and going on this date with an open heart." Bailey instructs me and I almost snort.

Open heart? 

My heart has  been carved out already.

Bailey pauses at the door.

"If he breaks it again?" She says, giving me a creepy smile when our eyes meet mine.

"Then I'll help you carry him for cremations to hide evidence.”