Fourteen

I couldn’t sleep. Every time I closed my eyes, I saw images of Alice and Erik together. I saw the way she looked at him, and knew that look well. It’s the way I used to look at Jaime. I’d follow him around with this pathetic hope in my eyes. And even though Jaime was gay, and his very DNA was repelled by my pheromones, even he cracked under the pressure and made-out with me once. Twice if you count the time I forcibly kissed him in my dorm room—but I don’t really count that. I was a woman on the edge back then.

But unlike Jaime and me, who had only ever locked lips, Erik had a sexual past with Alice, and that was haunting. I mean, I knew he had old flames. He was almost twenty-one and had admitted to having other partners. But that was just passing conversation. I didn’t know them, so I didn’t care. But tonight I came face-to-face with his high school sweetheart and that was no joke.

The thing is, despite whatever happened between them in the past, Erik is a one-in-a-million kind of guy. I knew now that Alice had played the field and seen the shit that’s out there. She would do whatever was in her power to win him back. They had a serious past. All I had was a season of bliss. Was that enough to hold him to me?

It was enough to make me crazy, and the more I reflected, the more I tossed and turned. My phone dinged, and I jumped, wondering who the hell would text me in the middle of the night. I shouldn’t have been surprised when I saw Erik’s name light up.

I can’t sleep. Are you up?

I could have just pretended that I was asleep. But, if he was up too, I might as well respond.

Wide awake.

He responded right away. Cool. Let’s go for a walk.

A walk? It was freezing outside. Not to mention the snow. But even with all my heartache and confusion, I’d rather be in the cold with Erik than alone and warm, tossing and turning. I pulled on my new Uggs and grabbed my Green Day sweatshirt. Erik was waiting at the bottom of the stairs. He didn’t say anything, just tipped his head to the side, beckoning me to follow him.

And sadly, I did.

We walked through the kitchen, out the back door, and down the driveway in silence. The only sound was the soft crunch of snow beneath our feet. Finally, Erik stopped next to his car.

“Erik, this is ridiculous. It’s freezing out here.”

“I know, that’s why I need you to get in the car.” He opened the front door, but before letting me in, bent down and pulled the lever so the front passenger seat went down and slid forward. “In the back,” he added.

Not having any interest in freezing my ass off, I obliged. Erik scooched in beside me and shut the door. Then he pulled my legs over onto his lap and tugged off my Uggs, tossing them over onto the driver’s seat. They landed with a thud, and I looked at him like he had lost his mind.

“What are you doing?”

“You wore your new Uggs in the snow. Tsk-tsk. Your mom is going to kill you.”

“You didn’t answer my question.”

Erik rubbed the ball of my striped-socked foot. He shrugged and looked at me innocently. “I’m apologizing.”

“Ugh.” I tugged my foot away. “Stop being Mr. Perfect. I’m not in the mood.”

He stretched out his long arm over the back of the seat. “Brit, you’re pissed. I’m not stupid.”

“Well, I can’t help it… I didn’t expect to have dinner with your family and your ex-girlfriend tonight. I was beyond uncomfortable!”

“Look, I honestly still don’t know why my mother invited her. And the fact that she did invite her and you had to feel uncomfortable—there are no words to take that away. I am truly sorry. That was the last way I wanted to spend Christmas Eve.”

He sounded sincere, and he looked immensely concerned, but I was still so hurt. “Your mom loves her, and it’s so clear you guys were connected in this whole way I don’t understand.”

He shook his head and flashed his blue weapons at me. “Baby, you have no clue what you’re talking about. You’re the only girl for me. That relationship was a long time ago.”

“But your mom—”

“My mom will always have a place in her heart for Alice. But that doesn’t mean she doesn’t adore you. I need you to trust me on this.”

He wanted me to trust him when everything was so vague. “Why did you guys break up?”

“Things changed. I was going to college.”

“Yeah, but it didn’t sound like things simply changed. Why would she need to make amends? That’s how your mother put it.” Erik’s face changed as he realized I had heard their little argument in the kitchen. He took a deep breath and ran his fingers through his hair.

“You know how you didn’t tell me about Jaime? He and Beaver came out on their own?”

I shook my head, feeling exasperated. “I don’t see how any of this is relevant.”

“It is. See? It wasn’t your secret to tell. You respected his privacy, that’s all I’m doing with Alice.” He leaned closer to me and cupped the side of my face with his palm. “She means nothing to me. But you mean everything.”

“You kissed her goodbye,” I said softly. It felt so petty saying it out loud. Yeah, it was on the cheek, but I still hated that he had done it. I knew what we had was so good, but she had rattled me.

Erik nodded in understanding, ran his tongue over his lips, and looked at me coolly. “You’re upset, and you need to let me apologize.” He leaned over and grabbed at the waistband of my pajama bottoms.

“Erik!” It came out as a hiss. “What are you doing?”

“Apologizing,” he said again. “I kissed Alice on the cheek. I’m about to worship you.” He slid my pants off in one quick gesture, tossing them on top of the Uggs then gave a wicked grin as he looked down at my panties. His tongue out like a hungry dog. “Purple lace! My favorite.”

I stared at him in disbelief. Sex? Seriously? Weren’t we fighting, or talking it out or something? “Erik! I told you! I can’t have sex with you in your house. It’s not right!”

“We’re not in my house, babe. I’m still following your rule.”

Why did he always have to be right? And how was he always so damn smooth? “We’re in your driveway, and I’m in my panties!” And I’m still mad at you! I shook my hands, not knowing whether to smack him or jump him. But God… the way he was looking at me, I just really wanted to jump him…

“You’re right, these gotta go.” And just like that, my panties were being masterfully slipped down my legs by the talented Mr. Draxton.

I didn’t stop him.

I also didn’t argue when he parted my thighs and buried his face against my core. No, I pretty much lost all matter of reasoning the moment he swept his warm tongue across my sex, causing my heart to race and my need to jump him to only be enhanced tenfold.

Was I mad at him? I couldn’t recall. All I knew was that my boyfriend was seriously skilled in the art of apologies.

This was all so new, and wanting to feel every sensation as his tongue dragged up and down my core, I spread my legs as wide as they could go in our claustrophobic surroundings; Erik moaned, grabbed my hips and generously stroked his tongue across my folds. He found my bundle of nerves and swirled his tongue around the nub, driving me crazy. I grabbed his hair and bit down hard on my bottom lip as he began sucking, licking, and rubbing his tongue all over my most sensitive spot, bringing me closer to the edge.

I’m about to worship you… now I understood what he meant by those words.

He flashed his gaze up at me. “Come for me, baby,” he said in between licks. His breath was warm and caused me to quiver. We were comfortable with each other, there was no denying that, but it was rare that Erik ever spoke dirty to me, and hearing him giving me an order like that? Well, I came undone. Literally.

“Holy fuck meister!” I cried as my orgasm exploded, radiating from my core, causing my thighs to tremble. I don’t think I had ever climaxed like that in all the times we had been together. Maybe it was the combination of mixed emotions, or the fact that I was half naked in his driveway, or maybe it was just his choice of words, but—damn! That was hot.

Erik crawled up over to me, his eyes mischievous. “Fuck meister? I didn’t know you spoke German.”

I ran the back of my hand across my forehead, slightly embarrassed. “I didn’t either.” We both laughed, and then he kissed me in that perfect familiar way that made the world melt away. I could taste myself on his tongue. It felt like forever since we last had sex.

“Brit,” he panted in between ravenous kisses. “I want you so bad.”

I wanted him, too. It was torture to deny him any longer, especially after what he had just done to me. My brain was soaked in lust, and all I could think about was Erik inside me. I pulled my mouth away from his to peek out the window and was surprised to discover it was all fogged up. “Do you think they’re asleep?”

“Brit, it’s 3 a.m. Trust me, they’re asleep.”

I bit my lip, still unsure. “What if we set the car alarm off?”

He laughed and dipped his forehead against mine. “You’re so cute, you think my car has an alarm?”

I was all out of excuses, and lying in a puddle of my own arousal, I had no other choice but to submit to the boy. “Okay,” I said shyly. Erik reached into his pocket and pulled out a foil wrapper. Looks like someone had this all planned. Honestly, I was so thankful he was responsible because I was having a hard time concentrating. I watched as he tore open the wrapper with his teeth, slipped his pajama bottoms down and rolled the condom on as fast as he could. Then, finally, Erik slid inside me groaning as I sheathed him.

“Fuck,” he said, his voice ragged as he pushed in deeper. “I’ve missed you so much.”

I should have told him I missed him too. That being with him like this made me feel whole. But I didn’t. I was still slightly jaded from earlier. “Show me how much,” I taunted. Erik groaned again as he thrust himself deeper inside me.

We’ve had slow, sensual sex before, and hot quickies in between class. But there was an urgency to this moment, like if we didn’t fuck right now, then we could never go back to the way things were.

“Look at me, baby,” he said softly. I opened my eyes and fell in love with him all over again. His stray blond hairs were flopped over his brow, his gaze set intently on mine. I pulled him closer, this time, fully accepting his apology. With every thrust, Erik reminded me that I was his.

And that chick at dinner… well, she was never getting him back.

We fell asleep in the car, limbs braided together. I opened my eyes to discover Erik’s face pressed against my neck, his arms wrapped tightly around my waist and his leg interlocked with mine. How the hell we fit in this car was beyond me. The windows were covered in snow, making the car dark like a cave. There was a slight crack in the blanket of snow, where I was able to peer out and see the sky was purple, dawn was about to break, and the snow had finally stopped.

Running my fingers through Erik’s hair, he stirred a bit but didn’t fully awaken. I kissed his temple. “Baby, you have to wake up.”

“Mmmph,” was his reply.

Erik was not a morning person. I had discovered this early on in our relationship. That was one of the reasons he had taken that night class where we first met. I gave him a squeeze. “Erik, the sun will be up soon, we need to get back inside. Besides, I’m cold.” In the heat of passion, I didn’t feel the freezing temperatures, and body heat had lulled me to sleep, but now I was awake and there was a chill in my bones. “Babe, please.” I nudged him again and this time he lifted his head, looking around and remembering where we were, the most deviant grin crossed his lips.

“I’m really cold,” I reaffirmed.

Erik nodded and sat up; he blinked a few times then rubbed his eyes. “I don’t know how but I slept really deeply.”

“Me too.”

He looked at his watch. “It’s almost six. Everyone will start to assemble for breakfast around eight, and then the family will arrive at one.” I had almost forgotten Erik’s entire family was coming today. I wasn’t sure if I was mentally prepared for that.

I nodded, pulling my hands inside the sleeves of my sweatshirt. Erik lunged forward and plucked my Uggs up from the front of the vehicle then scooped my feet up into his lap and started putting them on. “Here you go Cinderella, this coach has officially returned to pumpkin status.”

“It was one hell of a coach.”

Erik patted the seat. “Yes, I think I have new respect for the old girl.” He offered me his hand. “Shall we?”

As soon as we got out of the car, Erik stretched, seeming to grow before my eyes. The poor guy had been scrunched up like an accordion for the past few hours. He took a step toward the house and laughed. “Whoa, the snow is really deep. We must have gotten at least eight inches last night.”

“Erik!” I froze, grabbing his arm. “We’re going to leave a rather incriminating trail of footprints from the car to your house.”

He didn’t seem too concerned. “If anyone asks, I had your Christmas present hidden in my car. I went out to get it. You seriously need to stop stressing the small stuff, Monster High. We didn’t do anything wrong.”

“Sorry. I overthink everything. Besides, everyone is still asleep, right?”

“Right, let’s go.” We trudged through the snow and with every step, I knew my mom was going to kill me for destroying my new boots. Even with the snow falling inside from the mounds of snow I was stepping in, they were still extremely comfortable, not to mention warm. I guess sometimes Audrey actually knew what she was doing.

We shook off the snow and tip-toed inside. I turned to the stairs, but Erik pulled me hard in the opposite direction.

“What are you doing?” I whispered.

“Taking you to bed. I’m tired, don’t argue with me.”

I didn’t. I should have. But I was tired, too, and still cold. The thought of getting under his blankets and sleeping peacefully for another two hours was all too inviting. We reached the door to the basement and I sighed in pure contentment. I hadn’t been this relaxed in a while.

“Hey! Morning you two!” We both whipped around to find Erik’s dad fully dressed in his outdoor gear and prepared to battle winter. He had on everything from boots to gloves.

Deep breaths, deep breaths….

“Good Morning, Mr. Draxton.” Who said that? That wasn’t my voice. That was way too perky, not to mention squeaky.

“What are you doing up so early?” Erik asked. See, if I had asked that it would have sounded so accusatory. But he said it naturally, not a hair of suspicion was raised.

“Thought I’d get started on shoveling the driveway. We need to get a few cars in there today. There was a lot of snow last night.”

Erik’s face looked torn. He looked at me, eyes filled with disappointment. He gave me a crooked smile and shrugged. “Give me a second to put on some warmer clothes, I’ll help you, Dad.”

“Oh, great! With the two of us it’ll go quicker. I don’t want to miss your mom’s Christmas breakfast. I’ll meet you outside.” He walked out through the sliding doors and when he had left, Erik groaned.

“Talk about bad timing. Thirty seconds earlier and I would have had you downstairs and in my bed.”

“Yeah, and five minutes earlier he would have caught us in the car.” Thank God for small miracles!

“I’m not sure which one is worse. I really was looking forward to just a few more hours with you. Fuck.” He groaned. “Now I have to shovel.”

“It’s your penance.” I laughed. “Don’t worry, I’ll help you, too.”

“No, you’re too cold. I don’t need you getting sick. Go get some sleep and dream about me and all the naughty things we could have done if we weren’t interrupted.”

“Deal, but I’m going to go back to Lani’s room. I don’t need any more things to explain today. And emerging from the basement seems like I’m just pushing my luck.”

“Okay.” He sighed in exasperation then looked out the window to see where his dad was. He had his back to us, head down as he dug his shovel into the snow.

“One more thing.” He grabbed my waist and pinned me against the door to the basement, kissing me fiercely, making me instantly warmer. My hands cradled the back of his neck, my fingers gripping his locks of blond hair. Suddenly, I was wide awake and wishing I could draw down the shades of morning and return to the solitude of night. Where it was just us. He slowed down his kiss, pulling away and causing me to lean forward, not wanting to let him go. He moaned softly and released me of his kiss, then rubbed his nose against mine. It gave me tingles, and I smiled like a fool.

“Merry Christmas, Brit.”