LIFE WITHOUT HIM
LIFE WITHOUT HIM
Avani's life shattered when Rishabh abruptly ended their relationship. Was their love so feeble that he could sever it without a second thought? His betrayal, his lie from a year ago, haunted her every waking moment. Did her forgiveness even matter to him? Perhaps he was now leading a blissful life, free from the pain he inflicted on her. She refrained from delving into his life, from reaching out, from pleading for him to return. Rishabh had wounded her pride, shattered her self-respect, making it nearly impossible to regain her love, her dignity, and most crucially, her sense of self. The agony transformed her, making her cold and detached from within. Outwardly, she wore a calm facade, shielding the tempest that raged within her. For her family and friends, she appeared to have moved on, gracefully navigating life. But beneath the surface, she was irreparably broken.
Smriti stood witness to Avani's devastation throughout the past year.
In the aftermath of their breakup, Avani had barricaded herself at home, refusing to step out for a full ten days. A storm of emotions ravaged her, leading to a nervous breakdown and a relentless fever that kept her bedridden for another agonizing ten days. It took a month before Avani finally broke her silence, sharing her pain with Ma, unable to bear the burden alone. Yet, even within her family, the identity of the person who had shattered her remained a guarded secret.
The fury in her father's eyes mirrored that of her brother Anish, whose anger seemed capable of consuming the person responsible for Avani's suffering. Amidst the ruins of her heart, she fought to gather the shattered pieces, attempting to move forward from a past that felt like an eternity of pain.
One evening, as she walked back home from the office, the void within her seemed to deepen. The darkness around her mirrored the darkness of her own existence. Her eyes, heavy with the weight of her emotions, fell upon a black Innova with tinted windows parked in front of their society. It had been a constant presence for an entire year, a mysterious enigma that had never been unraveled. As she entered inside
society, her phone rang, and as she picked up, her sister Shreya danced in the background, bearing news.
"Di, wait! Ma wants to talk to you. There is good news," Shreya exclaimed, her joy infectious.
With piqued curiosity; Avani leaned closer to the screen. "Hi, okay, I am listening," she said, her voice laced with curiosity.
"Avani dear, Anish’s marriage date is fixed. It’s next month. Your brother is coming in 10 days, so we thought, it’s time now. They have already taken too much time. I don’t want to wait anymore," Avani's mother shared, her eyes reflected a mix of happiness and concern.
Avani found a moment of solace in the society garden; the tranquility offered a contrast to the whirlwind of emotions within her. Plugging in her earphones, she replied, "That’s great news, Mom. But how are you planning to finish all preparations in such a short duration? And I won't be there; Shreya is working too."
"That's why I called you. You need to come, mostly in the next 10 days, when Anish is arriving, and help me here," Avani's mother implored.
"I might not get leave in such a short duration, Mom. Let me see what I can do," Avani responded, her mind already racing with possibilities.
"Okay, dear, but you need to come. Check if you can work from home for this month and the next," Her mother insisted, her worry evident in her voice.
Avani sighed, her mother's concern tugging at her heartstrings. "Ma, I think it's time you should settle down now. I know what pain you have gone through, but it's time. Shall we go ahead and start looking for marriage proposals? There are a lot of good proposals coming for you," Avani's mother said, her words were heavy with a mix of hope and apprehension.
Avani paused, the weight of her mother's words sinking in. "Mom, you know it’s not easy for me. But please, can you wait for some more time? I am just settling down in my career. I know you are worried. But trust me, Mom, I am fine. Okay, I need to go up. I will talk to you later." Waving a reluctant goodbye, she disconnected the video call, her mind was clouded with thoughts of an uncertain future.
Avani wrestled with her emotions, torn between the love she still felt and the betrayal she couldn't forgive. Eight years of unwavering devotion had left an indelible mark on her heart. Even though he was no longer a part of her life, her love for him persisted, refusing to wane. Yet, forgiveness eluded her, a bitter taste kept lingering in the corners of her heart.
When she shared the news of Anish's impending marriage with Smriti, an unspoken fear gripped her. The prospect of her own marriage loomed on the horizon, a future she wasn't prepared for. Her heart already belonged to someone else, a truth she clung to fiercely.
Later that evening, as she and Smriti prepared dinner, thoughts of the mysterious guest lecture tugged at her attention. "Are you going to attend the guest lecture tomorrow after Townhall?" Smriti inquired, her voice pulling Avani back to the present.
Avani hesitated, uncertainty clouding her response. "Depends who is the guest," she replied, her tone carrying a weight of indifference, masking the turmoil within.
Smriti nodded in understanding. "No one knows, the identity is a bit secret. They have kept it as a Surprise Guest lecture. I believe it’s to gather the people, as most leave when the town hall ends."
Nodding absentmindedly, Avani said, "I'll check my schedule. I might be in a meeting, but I'll try to come directly from there," But her mind was still preoccupied with thoughts that were refused to settle down.
Later, in the silence of her room, Avani closed her eyes, attempting to shut out the world. His face, etched in her memories, resurfaced, a painful reminder of what was lost. A solitary tear escaped from her right eye, tracing a path down her cheek.
This had become her nightly ritual since the breakup. Despite her tears have dried up, her eyes welled up anew whenever his image haunted her thoughts. Sleep had become elusive. The weight of unresolved emotions pushed her towards insomnia, and the pills she took merely masked the turmoil within her soul.. The pain of heartbreak had morphed into a sleepless agony, a constant companion in her lonely nights.