133.Nothing is Bliss

133.Nothing is Bliss
I woke up, my body felt stiff, this time Teddy was next to me. I didn’t remember what had happened after he came and got me. Did I do the ritual. My body felt like it was vibrating, almost. It had to be the ritual, it had to be, I figured. “How are you feeling?” Teddy asked. I turned to face him.  

His wing was draped over me as it always was when we laid in bed. He looked tired, it was the first time I had ever seen him look tired or worn out. One of his hand was under his wing and on my back. “Teddy what happened, did I do the ritual?” I asked and he nodded. He looked so exhausted, why though?  

“Is that why there is like tingling in my body, it has to be Malachar’s power in me, right?” I asked. “Probably,” I didn’t remember this happening last time, I didn’t remember much from last time, whenever I tried to think about it, my mind started replaying other things. “I think something is happening to me.” I stated.  

Teddy’s hand came up and cradled my face. “It will all be okay Beatrix, don’t think about it okay.” He said, as if it was painful for even him to really discuss. “Leia and Aiden came to see me.” I said. He stilled. “What happened?” He tried to sound casual, but there was a bit of edge that I picked up in his tone. “They almost sounded like they were saying goodbye, what is going on Teddy, please, fucking tell me. I feel like I am missing something.” My chest tightened, My body ached and then ease came and I closed my eyes again.  

I heard sounds “This is not healthy Theo and you know that. You look exhausted,” It was Leia’s voice. Then I heard Baron speaking “I get it, you want her happy, but you can’t help her if you don’t rest. I know it is horrible, but you need to lock her up and get some rest, even if just for a night, you have to sleep to, Beatrix would want you to take care of yourself.” I was awake, wasn’t I?  

I couldn’t tell, since Paris it had been hard for me to tell what was happening, and whenever I tried to figure it out, my mind slipped from me. I listened as they spoke again, it was Leia this time “She won’t be alone, I will sit outside her cell, while you sleep. Please Theo, you have to rest, she is more powerful now." They were trying to get him to lock me up, but why?  

I felt my hand twitch, “You can’t keep her mind at every second of the day anymore Theo. She is too powerful, if you don’t rest, you will slip and so will she, And we all know that would be a fucking disaster.” Baron said. Suddenly I smelled it, my own blood. My eyes opened and I looked at my fist. I had clenched my hand so tightly that my nails bit into my skin so aggressively that I drew my own blood.  

I looked up and Teddy was staring at me, his grey eyes on me, analyzing me. Then it was like my mind shut off and everything was black. I was in a void, I saw nothing, it was almost peaceful as if the blackness was hugging me.  

Then there was screaming, the black shifted to red, it was blood. Everywhere, it was everywhere on me, under my nails, coating my hair. I tried to scream but nothing, I was choking. I was choking on blood. “Please Beatrix please try to calm down.” Leia said. My eyes flew open and I was in a cell, I could see her, she was on the other side of the bars that locked me in.  

“Please stop screaming, Theo needs to sleep, and he won’t if you keep that up, he will come down to help.” I didn’t care I wanted to drink, I wanted out. I wanted what I saw in my mind. I wanted to bathe in blood. I could do without the choking on blood, but the other parts sounded nice. “Let me out!” I screamed. I could see Leia’s tears flowing down her face.  

“Beatrix stop, just stop screaming, Baron will be back in a second with blood, just Theo needs sleep.” She said and I wailed. “Where is he, did he lock me up, I will kill him, I will fucking kill him.”  Baron showed up with several Goats. “I want real fucking food” I yelled but I was given nothing else. I screamed and screamed, all I wanted was fresh human blood, but no one would give it to me.  

Leia stayed outside the bars, she would cry and sometimes try to tell me a story, but I was sick of it. Then Teddy showed up. He looked happy to see me though he was on the other side of the bars. “Hi love” He said and all I could bring myself to do was snarl. My throat was aching. He looked around the cell, “You seem to have eaten well” Again I snarled at him.  

He opened the cell door, “Thank you Leia, I have it from here.” I hated it. “She is gone Theo.” I heard her say. My body twisted, in the chains I was secured in. “Not yet Leia, she isn’t gone yet.” Teddy said and I couldn’t help but try to lunge at him, but the chains were too short. Teddy came in close, but he wasn’t close enough, not enough to bite and drink. “I missed you love, but I am here now, you get to relax now.” He said.  

Then the blackness clouded my mind and I was embraced by peace. I wasn’t thirsty just content. I didn’t feel happy, but I didn’t feel sad either. I just felt at ease. I liked whatever black was covering me. There was no love, no despair just nothingness and I loved it. I didn’t feel pain or empty I just felt nothing and it was fucking bliss.