Chapter 23 – Not a quitter.

"Shanna!" Hindi itinago ni Allison ang disappointment sa tinig niya dahil sa sinabi ng kaibigan.

Naroon daw si Ethan kasama nito. Pero hindi pa ito pumapasok sa silid niya kasi ihinihingi pa ito sa kanya ni Shanna ng pahintulot.

"I'm sorry, Ally. Alam ko na nangako ako sa'yo," malumanay na paghingi ni Shanna ng paumanhin. "Pero maniwala ka, you and Ethan need this. You have to let go of the pain in your heart."

"Hindi mo naiintindihan!" Mariin niyang sabi. Ayaw niyang magalit kay Shanna. Pero masama ang loob niya dahil hindi nito nirespeto ang kahilingan niyang 'wag ipaalam kay Ethan ang sitwasyon niya. "I have my reasons, Shanna! And they're valid. Now tell me, what would happen next after this? Ayoko ng guluhin ang buhay ni Ethan! I did not hide for so long just to show up to him when I'm about to die..."

"No, please. Don't always say that, Ally," pakiusap ni Shanna na nauna na namang umiyak kaysa sa kanya.

Alam niyang mabuti ang intensyon nito sa pagdadala roon kay Ethan. But Shanna must accept the truth that she's dying and not even Ethan could stop it from happening. She just wanted to go peacefully. Why must Ethan need to know about her condition?

"It's the truth. Please, paalisin mo si Ethan. I don't want him to see me like this. I don't need his pity nor his reminder that I deserved this for leaving him." Doon tumulo ang mga luha niya. Anong iisipin ni Ethan kapag nakita siya nito?

No. Ayaw niyang kaawaan siya nito.

"Ally," halatang ayaw pumayag ni Shanna.

"Please?" Pakiusap niya. "It's my wish, Shanna. I don't want to see him. Please, kung talagang kaibigan kita, hindi mo 'to ipipilit sa akin."

Yumuko ang dalaga at nagpahid ng mga luha nito bago siya tiningnan ulit. "Ally, in case you will change your mind, just ask Yanah to call us. I want you to know that Ethan sincerely wanted to see you and it's not for the reasons that you mentioned. Give him a chance."

Hindi siya sumagot hanggang sa makalabas ng silid niya si Shanna.

'No... You don't understand. I don't want any reason to get angry about my condition. I don't want any regret. I just wanted to die alone...'

Nang mawala na sa harapan niya si Shanna ay saka siya umiyak. Bakit kasi siya pa?

***

He had heard everything dahil nasa pintuan lang naman siya ng silid ni Allison. But seeing Shanna's sad smile to confirm what he already knew still hurt Ethan.

"I'm sorry," Shanna murmured.

"It's okay," he answered and smiled bitterly at his cousin.

Naiintindihan niya kung ayaw siyang makita ni Allison. Shanna was right, he failed Ally. Nabigo siyang patunayan dito that nothing she would ever do would make him love her less. Nagpalamon siya sa galit. Hindi niya nakita how hard it would've been for Ally to leave him so he wouldn't suffer with her.

Pero bakit hindi nagtiwala sa kanya si Ally na sasamahan niya ito? Bakit mas pinili nitong lumayo?

Just yesterday, matapos nilang mag-away ng pinsan niya tungkol kay Ally, siguradong-sigurado pa siyang wala siyang pakialam kay Allison. But just after seeing her picture, para siyang binuhusan nang malamig na tubig. Parang after two years, noon lang ulit siya nahimasmasan sa ginawa niyang pagtalikod sa babaeng mahal niya.

It wasn't true that it was Ally who turned her back first. It was him. Dahil sabi nga ni Shanna, hindi niya nakita ang katotohanan sa likod ng kasinungalingang binitawan nito.

He let anger consumed him. He should've known better than believe that Allison would trade their love for twenty million... Naaalala pa niya ang biro nito noon nang ang kanyang ina ang nag-alok ng sampung milyon dito. Ally said she couldn't be bought with millions when she knew his mother was making billions. Twenty million was just twice as much as the initial offer. Thinking about it now, he realized that he made a fatal mistake when he believed her lies.

And now, no matter how much he would regret his decision in the past, hindi na niya maibabalik pa ang dating Ally.

"Pasensya na kayo," sabi ni Yanah sa kanila. Nasa admin office sila ng shelter at nag-iwan nang malaking halaga hindi lang para kay Ally kundi sa lahat ng naroon. "Hindi ganyan si Ally. Baka hindi lang maganda ang pakiramdam niya."

"It's fine, Ms. Ignacio," tugon niya bagamat mistulang punyal na sumaksak sa kanya ang katotohanang kalakip ng sinabi ni Yanah. Allison didn't tell her who he was. Wala na nga ba talaga itong pakialam? O isa na naman iyong kasinungalingan?

'You should know by now when she was lying, Ethan,' his mind told her.

"Maraming salamat sa donasyon ninyo. Marami kayong buhay na mabibigyan ng pag-asa," Yanah said again.

"We will visit again, Yanah," sabi ni Shanna.

"Please do. This is a hard time for Ally. She need friends who will remind her that this isn't over yet. If you know what I mean..."

"Of course. Please tell her that we will visit her again."

Yanah sent them off.

"I'm sorry," sabi agad ni Shanna pagkasakay nila sa kotse niya. "Ally thinks na naaawa ka lang sa kanya."

"Do you think she's right?"

"Come on! I know you, Ethan Montenegro!" Pinaikutan pa siya nito ng mga mata. "I never believed for one second that you do not love her anymore."

He chuckled. She was right. Talagang kilala siya ni Shanna. May maitatago ba siya sa babaeng ito na kasabay niyang lumaki?

"So, what's your plan now?" Tanong nito.

"You should know that I'm not a quitter, Shanna. Allison knew me better than think na susuko ako porque sinabi niyang ayaw niya akong makita." He smirked.

"Oh yeah!" Sang-ayon ni Shanna.

Marahil, sabay na nagbalik sa mga isipan nila kung paano sila nag-umpisa ni Allison. Hindi ba nga't todo iwas din ito sa kanya noon? Pero may nagawa ba ito sa charm at kakulitan ng isang Ethan Montenegro?

Napangiti siya. Pero parang kinurot ang puso niya nang maalala ang mga masasayang nakaraan nila ni Allison. Their past that he threw away when he believed the biggest lie of his life. The lie that brought them to this painful present where time is their enemy.

No. Hindi na siya papayag na iwanan siya ni Allison ulit. Para saan ang lahat ng pera niya kung wala siyang magagawa para dugtungan ang buhay ng mahal niya?