Enzo
A woman was screaming in my dreams, her terror ripping through me as though it were my own.
I flew out of the bed like it was on fire, my hand going immediately to my nightstand drawer where I'd stashed my gun earlier. Before I was even fully awake, I had a bullet in the chamber as my eyes swung around the room, searching for the threat.
But there was no one there except me and Sera, who was lying stiff and still, her face contorted in terror as breathless screams tore from her throat, triggering things inside of me I'd rather not revisit.
My heart began to pound, and my hands started to shake. I broke out into a cold sweat. Sera struggled against the invisible bonds holding her in place, tears flowing down her cheeks. Carefully, I slid the safety on and set the gun down on the nightstand. It rattled as it hit the wood, and I quickly let go of it. Memories of Alessandra and Elliot swept through me, distorting my vision of reality. Concentrating on my breathing, I fought down the panic attack that was threatening to overwhelm me.
Quite a traumatized pair we were.
I knew how to talk her down earlier, and I used those same tactics on myself now. Sera needed me. I didn't have time to give in to this pussy bullshit. So as I climbed back onto the bed, I counted three things I could feel. Three things I could see. Three things I could smell. And when I reached her, I was out of my own head enough to take her by the shoulders and sit her up. "Sera. Baby, it's me. It's just me."
Her head lolled to the side and her eyes rolled back in her head as she tried to fight me off with weak strikes of her fists. I kept talking to her, repeating the same thing over and over until the screams died in her throat and her eyes fluttered open. Lifting her head, she blinked as she tried to focus on me.
"It's me, baby. It's just me. You're safe. You're okay."
"Enzo?" Her voice was raspy from screaming.
"You're here with me. I won't let anything happen to you," I promised her.
Her eyes skittered around the room and then came back to me. "I'm sorry," she whispered. "I was dreaming I was back there and…" She didn't finish what she was about to say, but she didn't have to.
"I know."
"Can I have some water?"
Her question took me off guard. "Yes. I'll get you some." It was only when I removed my hands from her shoulders and saw the white fingermarks on her skin that I realized how tightly I'd been holding her. A sharp pang of guilt shot through me. The last thing she needed was to be manhandled right now. "I'll be right back." Quickly, I slid off the bed and walked out to the living area and got her a bottle of water from the small refrigerator.
"Thank you," she said when I gave it to her.
I watched her take a long drink, then I sat down on the side of the bed. "Better?"
She stared down at the bottle in her hands. "No," she told me. "Are you?"
"Me?"
She nodded.
"I'm fine. I'm just concerned about you."
"Why?"
"Why?" I couldn't keep the incredulousness out of my tone.
"Yeah." She paused for a moment, and then the rest of the words came out in a rush. "Why, Enzo? Why are so concerned about a girl you barely know? Why did you risk your life to help me?"
Her eyes bore into mine, searching for the truth. And I gave it to her. "Because we made a deal, and I always uphold my end of a deal." And because, deal or no deal, you're mine. The truth of it slammed into me so hard it nearly sent me reeling backward on the bed. And in its wake, a flood of anxiety followed. But I fought it back. She wasn't my wife. She wasn't Alessandra. I could keep her safe. From the family. From her father.
From me.
"What if I want out of our agreement?"
Although the question was asked with an innocent curiosity, pain flared in the center of my chest. "Is that true?"
She hesitated, lowering her eyes as she frowned down at her lap, and the pain was replaced by hope. "Honestly, I don't know anything right now."
I wanted to touch her. To erase the memories of the other men. Men who'd taken what was mine. But I was afraid if I did, she would freak out on me again. I could see the tension in her body. The way she held herself so rigidly, so straight and tall. And yet I felt like the touch of a feather would shatter her into a million pieces.
My anger returned, unreasonable and violent, rushing through my veins. "We have an agreement, you and I. And I expect you to live up to your end of it." I stopped, closed my eyes, and took a breath before opening them again. "Not right now. Not tonight. But soon. We made a deal, Sera," I repeated. Even as I heard the words leave my mouth, I felt like the biggest mezzo di merda-piece of shit-in the world. But I couldn't stop myself from making these demands of her. I couldn't let her leave my life. Not now. Not yet.
She stared at me through tear-filled eyes and didn't say a word.
"Do you want to go back to your father? Because I can make that happen. I can pick up the phone right fucking now, and his men will be here to haul your ass back to Dallas in a matter of hours. Is that what you want?" I pressed.
"No," she whispered.
God, I was a fucking monster. Because the only thing I wanted to do right now was to push her back on the bed and shove my cock so far inside of her that there would be nothing and no one but me for her. No memories. No threat of her father. No mafia. Nothing. Just me and her until she gave in to me. "Sera."
Raw need colored my voice when I said her name. Hearing it, she inhaled sharply, and her eyes shot to mine. I wanted to tell her how I'd died inside when I found out she went missing. How the only thing that kept me from going completely mad was the fact that we had the video and knew who'd taken her. I wished I'd kept his heart, so I could present it to her now as a bloody offering to prove my loyalty.
But I didn't say any of that. I couldn't. The words stuck in my throat. Yet whatever she saw in my eyes, the pain and anguish and madness, it drew her to me like I was a white-hot flame. She leaned toward me until I reached up and cupped her face in my hand. "Sera," I whispered.
The touch of her lips on mine was something I never thought I would feel again as I'd waited for the call from Rene, telling me that he couldn't find her. Or that if he had found something, it was her dead body. The fear that I refused to let myself feel then rose inside of me now, making me desperate to feel her, warm and alive, beneath me. To smell her scent. To hear her voice call my name. To feel the pain of her nails digging into my skin, and the wet heat of her cunt wrapped around my cock.
"Sera." I moaned her name against her lips. A plea to let me bring her pleasure. Not pain. Not again. Never again. "I want to touch you." Softly, I bit her lower lip.
I felt her stiffen and pull away slightly, but I still had my hand cupped around her cheek and I brought up my other hand so she couldn't run away. Her eyes were wide as they locked onto mine.
"I won't hurt you," I told her. "I swear I won't hurt you. I only want to make you feel good. Please, allow me to do that for you. Let me do this for you. Let me show you how good I can make you feel."
"You've already done that. Before."
A fresh wave of guilt tore through me when I remembered how violently I'd taken her innocence. And even after it had happened, after I'd seen her tears and felt her pain, I couldn't keep my hands off of her and I'd taken her again in the bathtub. I'd tried to make it better for her that time, but I know it had to still hurt. And the men who'd had her in that fucking house-my gut clenched until I wanted to vomit just thinking about it-they hadn't given two shits about the woman they were using.
I pressed my forehead to hers, my hands gentle on her face even as my muscles shook with the effort it took me to hold myself still. "No," I told her. "I didn't. I was too rough. And I hurt you. And for that, Sera, I'm so sorry."
"You didn't know," she whispered.
I pulled away just enough that I could see her face. "I need to touch you." But I made no move to do so, knowing instinctively that if I forced her now, I would never get her back. Physically, I could take her body and do what I wanted with it. But that would make me no better than them. No, I couldn't take her the way I wanted to until I had her complete surrender. And that would take time and trust. So, for now, I needed to wait for her permission. Even if it fucking killed me.