A Plan

Meadow whistles at me, almost deafening me with the strength she can emit with just two fingers in her mouth, and motions with her hand in a circling manner to get me to turn around. She's bossy but there's something likeable about her and I'm fast warming to her pushy personality.

She's gone to town on me in a short space of time. My hair sleek, combed until it's glossy and pulled up into a high ponytail that she said made my waves come together to an almost ringlet at the back. She's blushed, pinched, dabbed, and painted my face with various products, and squeezed me into clothes she swears are my size, but the restrictions I feel make me doubt it. My bust is surprisingly close in size to what she wears, so no doubt she heavily downsizes for extra oomph in her breast department.

Skintight soft denim jeans, paired with a fitted white tank with a low-cut V. I'm all cleavage I never knew I had, a booty I feel is way out on show from sculpted pants and I'm pulling on the soft mauve velvet hoody she told me to leave open. My feet in crisp white sneakers. because we're going for the 'casual and didn't try too hard' look, and she's thrown some silver hoops in my ears, with a simple dainty necklace holding a tiny green crystal she said was the color of my eyes.

Honesty, I spent my life dressing in shapeless or loose clothing to feel comfortable and not to draw attention, and now I feel like I have way too much on show. and a bit too dressed up for a wolf pack meeting in their communal. I know Colton has seen me naked after turning, but this feels more exposed somehow. Maybe because I rarely wear makeup and what's done feels strange on my skin, my lids heavier with the lashings of a mascara.

Everything is perked and propped up, held in tight fabrics that enhance my curves and I wish I could see it for myself to tell how bad or good it is. For all I know I look like a clown. But no, I only busted every damn mirror in this mansion some hours ago and can only go by Meadows reaction, which seems to be positive.

"I would bang you, Chica." She winks, throwing me a kiss and blows it my way dramatically, clicking her fingers, and her tongue on the roof of her mouth in unison, to make an approval noise.

"Thanks, I guess." I respond with a half laugh, have nervous cough, not sure if that's the appropriate thing to say, but she laughs airily.

"I like you, Burl. You're funny, without trying to be. You're like this little naive awkward kid, but with a heart of a vixen, waiting to come into her own. Don't ever change that." She eyes me over once more, nodding to herself with obvious pride at what she's created, and it warms me to my stomach. It's weird to have someone genuinely look at me with a hint of pride and acceptance like this. I mean, Colton doesn't count when he did it earlier, he has to feel that way about me as it's ordained by the fates to be so.

"I'll try not to." I smooth my hands down the soft fabric smothering my legs and do one final check from my own viewpoint. Literally, all I can see is boobs.

"You sure I look okay and not too obvious?” doubt is already swarming me, denting the little bit of confidence she's been building up in the last half hour and Meadow shakes her head, loosening those beach curls she has going on at the ends as she puts in some oversized gold hoops in her own ears.

"Please… I know what I'm doing, and I ain't no fool when it comes to teasing men. We went for sexy casual, just work it, trust me on this. One eyeful of that bootylicious and Colton gonna be dry humping your ass into next week like a wolf in heat." She extends a hand, that mischievous glint on those pale blue sultry eyes, straightening her own fitted white blouse down over those mega breasts of hers with her free hand, and I hop forward to catch her fingers in mine. Eager to go before I lose all my nerve and wipe this off.

We've only been up here for around twenty-five minutes maximum, but it feels like hours have passed and I'm so much more relaxed with her even, if I'm not relaxed with how I'm kitted out. I guess having her right in my face with various implements she could have gouged my eyes out with, built trust. I can't explain and can only go by memory of what being part of a pack was to compare, but this feels a lot like Meadow is bringing me to her as her pack sister, initiating a bond. It makes me choke up a little, suddenly so grateful that she's Contraltos second and has her own kind of bond with him which has pushed her to invest in me. It's nice to have another person who likes me, for whatever reason.

"Let's go find your man and make Carmen's face implode." Meadow sounds like she's a little too invested in doing that, her accent a tad heavier when she's smirking, her lips curling like the cat that got the cream. That smug tone, and I can't deny, she's lifted my mood completely in terms of that 'Skanky Sputa which I now know means 'dirty slut'. Eloquent. I guess having someone on your side who's not ordained by the fates to be so, makes a difference. It's no longer just me and Colton.

Meadow leads the way, and with a combination of moving fast, and giggling at nothing in particular as we play, push, and shove each other around corners and doors, downstairs, back to where we started, we seem to get there in record time. I barely took in my surroundings at all this time. Who knew a Santo Beta wolf could be so fun to hang out with?

The door to the study is shut but I know before following her in that Colton isn't here yet. I can't feel him anywhere near this room, nor any fresh scent, and swallow down hard as I step in, right behind her, almost hidden in her shadow.

The rest of them are in various states of lounging, uninterested by our return and definitely did not miss our presence. Someone is playing music in the corner on a cell phone, or a small device, I can't see, and it seems they have all had a couple, or a few, drinks in our absence. The smell of booze wafting our way and tinting the air with that chemical whiff.

I can't miss Carmen sitting alone at the desk, sulk face fully initiated. She's flicking through a large book, something heavy with aging pages and glances up hatefully as I make eye contact. She doesn't say anything and goes back to what she's reading and pretending we didn't just walk in.

"I have to admit, she scrubs up well and I guess, I can see why Cole couldn't keep his hands off her…." One of the twin's remark as Meadow gets out of my way, exposing me fully to the room. There's a cough, as Carmen reminds them of her presence, how much she doesn't like that comment and Deli shuts up. Naomi pushes his brother in the shoulder playfully, shaking his head at him and eyes me up too. I can tell by the way he flickers over me, nodding with a smile, that he agrees.

"Okay, so like this, maybe I can see the potential. I mean…. Ouch" He makes a motion with his hands as though he touched something hot and then dramatically blows his fingers and makes a sizzling noise with his mouth. Despite the earlier hostility with these two, I smile slightly, giggling involuntarily, screwing up my nose in shyness at being scrutinized as my heats with a blush.

"See, Chica, they like. My boys, they know sexy when they see it. I think it's a massive improvement to wearing Coleus cast offs." Meadow walks around me, her own final appraisal as though she didn't spend minutes upstairs admiring her handy work and then sashays away again, grinning to herself. She's congratulating herself on her awesome skills.

"Who likes what?” Colton seems to appear out of thin air while I was too distracted to pick up on him, and I spin, in both surprise, and instant nervousness, realizing I didn't get any time to prepare myself for him walking in. I'm just standing here halfway into the room like some awkward kid who's been asked to model the ugly jumper her grandmother knitted for Christmas.

Our eyes lock as he hits me with that megawatt cute boy smile, a hint of dimples, and a reminder how gorgeous Colton is when he relaxes and let's his charms shine. That's before breaking contact to let his gaze slide down my outfit and back again. I can tell by the raised brow expression he likes what he sees, and that smile turns into a full-on dimple enhanced swoon worthy, sexy smile, with an accompanying twinkle in his eye that melts me to my core. It does weird things to my insides, and my butterflies rise up and set my skin alight with a smoldering fire.

Well, I'll be damned. I thought naked was good.

His mental message has me blush insanely, heat consuming my face, his voice dripping with heightened lust, but it's short lived when I catch him side glancing Carmen and he seems to instantly put his tongue away. Pulling back his reaction and yanking on that serious persona once more. It's like he got scolded and I wonder if she mind linked him and gave him what for. In her head they're still 'trying to work things out’, even if I know otherwise.

"My father gave me a schedule of where all the packs, teams and such are to report at dawn. We meet in the mess at first light. Our subs are convening on the west river, the old basketball court, and we'll be in charge of continuing training with the pack members already learning combat …. and of course, Lorey."

Straight into leader mode, pushing that spark between us aside as responsibility kicks in. I don't know who gasps louder, out of literally everyone in the room. Even I take that last word or two in with a little inhale of 'what?’

"She's training with us? Has she ever done any sort of hand to hand or weapons training in her life? We might kill her by mistake!” It's the previous silent member that I never got a good look at and he steps forward now. Appearing from behind the bar area and I flinch when I catch sight of his face.

He's older than Colton for sure, a little Green of his hair at the temples and he has one completely white eyeball that suggests he's partially blind. The other so dark brown in comparison that you can't help but react when you see it. A raggedy awful looking scar running from cheek to forehead and passing right through, so deep you can tell he was wounded pretty badly whenever this happened and it's literally the first thing you see.

I try not to stare but it is so very rare to see a wolf with any kind of scars. We seashell, miraculously, and instantly most of the time, and only one kind of wound will ever leave a mark like that on a healthy wolf. Silver dipped in Wolfgang. I heard they used it against our kind in the wars with some success, although it killed most.

If it doesn't kill you, then it leaves you forever marked as he is, by creating an infection inside of you and poisoning the site around it. It eats into your body and flesh and makes you so very sick that healing won't cure the mess, you have to heal like a human. I don't recall ever seeing him, but I guess with damage like, that he wouldn't want to be seen outside much.

Wolves are very high ego and any kind of failure in battle makes them act weird and live in shame. We're all about that. I mean, it's literally affected my entire existence.

"Where else would she train? She's safer with me and I'm safer being the one to teach her to fight. This thing is real, and no one has more experience than the combat teams, of which we are one." Colton has an edge to his tone; his gaze flickers my way and I catch Carmen, out of the corner of my eye, throwing him a full on pathetic and woeful look. Aiming to manipulate him, with what I assume used to be a tried and tested method when he was with her. Tears come out to play, and I try and ignore her. Contraltos jaw muscle twitches and he glances away from her, back at his pack, somewhat unimpressed. A frown creasing his forehead and his eyes cloud over a little in blowy amber.

"Radar, I think it's the best plan and we as a unit can bring her up to speed and teach her how to sync with us… to become one fluid machine, with an extra set of teeth. Our pack lost numbers with Carly and Ebony both being with pup and out of action." Meadow throws me an encouraging warm smile as she backs up Contraltos, bringing my attention to the fact there's more to this sub pack normally, bringing femmes numbers to almost match the males. She starts subtly growling at her mate when he opens his mouth to say something and he shuts it just as quickly.

I blink back at the scarred wolf and click; his name must be Radar. Weird for a name, and I assume it's a nickname, something to do with whatever gift he has. I do know some wolves possess ability to feel things coming from afar and have insight to certain things in the way a real radar pulse would. I wonder if it's what he can do, although maybe not, if the vampire attack was unforeseen.

“And if she's useless and slows us down… what then?” Carmen butts in nastily, abandoning her pitiful act bitchily because he didn't bite and instead pushes between us to get in the middle of the conversation. Putting herself between Colton and I and nudges closer to him in a bid to mark her territory. Colton steps sideways away from her and turns and walks to the bar, pulling out a bottle of water from a concealed fridge and takes a slow drink without reacting to her in any way.

"Why would she be? We're good teachers, we've taught many of our kind and started them in their training, besides, didn't you see the chaos in the house or were you too busy being blinded by your own seething hatred?” Meadow doesn't hold back, her words dripping with venom, coming at her from across the room where she's been standing back to admire her bodywork, and Colton sighs loudly. He turns, perches his butt against the edge of the bar, and it's only now I notice the dark circles under his eyes and the unusually pale pallor of exhaustion.

"Can you two stop, for just …. an hour… I swear, this shit gives me a headache." lackluster too and I wonder what exactly went down with his meeting with his father. His usual shine is missing.

"She started it!” Carmen blurts out, like a juvenile tattle telling, and it makes me frown at her with a subtle shake of my head. Mature she is not. She's following Colton once more, across the room as he pushes off and heads for a couch, but he sees her coming and crosses away to perch on the arm of the opposite one, where the twins are sprawled out with cans of beer. She looks annoyed instantly. at the fact she can't sit anywhere near him and it irritates me endlessly that she's chasing him around. It's obvious to all of us he wants her to leave him alone.

"She has a name, and no… I think your skanky Pita booty always starts shit. When are you going to stop trailing his ass and sit down? You're being pathetic." Meadow lets out a frustrated 'aargh noise under her breath when Carmen ceases to edge closer to him, mirroring my sentiments exactly. She walks over and yanks Carmen by the arm harshly, pushing her into a nearby chair aggressively, so Carmen stumbles backwards ungracefully and butt thuds, then throws a commanding pointer finger in her face. One of her talons only millimeters from the end of piercing Carmen's nose.

“Now sit! … Like a good little puppy, or I might have to spank you." Meadow is throwing attitude and with a tone and glare like hers, I wouldn't argue. Carmen's face turns puce with outrage, her eyes darting wildly to Colton to overrule his second in command and chastise her for talking to her that way, manhandling her, but Colton inhales again, sighing heavily and goes back to his previous position of sipping on his bottle of water. Carmen really does look like she may self-implode and make Meadow's and my day after all.

Meadow slinks over to Cesar on one of the armchairs and crawls onto his lap, curling herself around him and nestling her butt against his crotch. I can't help but watch the way he opens up and accepts her invasion, wrapping her in his arms willingly, and whispers something in her ear before she smiles at him sexily and flutters a kiss on his lips quickly. So fluid, no refusal, and no insecurity in her that he might not want her sat on him.

It's obvious they're completely bonded in all ways and although I haven't seen her mark, I can tell it's done. They have that connection oozing from both of them, that says their union is finalized and they can communicate on a deeper level than what we have so far. A mark can be wherever your mate decides to put it, although most males like to have it on show and put it on a females throat, not all do. They're known for territorial possessiveness so it's more common than not. Cesar is obviously very secure about his fiery hot femmes can battle off males by herself.

I find myself aching for that, wondering where Colton would choose to place his, and have to tear my eyes away from him before Carmen kicks off again. My heart beating a little too fast, and my soul yearning stronger than before. I miss his touch already.

I realize I've zoned out, blinking back to reality and they're talking about zones and patrols and something to do with the new containment areas. I try to listen in as Colton explains that they're setting up homes in the valley to try and accommodate the families from other parts of the mountain tomorrow. That tents and temporary buildings will need to be erected and the local bar and school on this side will be converted, along with the gym and the community hall. They have caravans and mobile homes coming out of storage for some, but a lot of the people they want to move closer are refusing to leave their homes and unite on this side.

“You can't force people to shift everything and up and leave to move a few miles. I get the why, but these people, they don't want to leave their homes for a tent in the fields, Cole." It's Jesus, and I watch as they all lean forward, seriousness kicking in as they talk this out and freely throw in opinions. Everyone except me, and of course Carmen, who is now focused on the conversation at hand and silently listening on the outskirts of the huddle, gazing longingly at Colton.

"We don't know when another attack will come, and it's easier to keep them safe if we have them here." Colton shrugs, seemingly repeating what he's been told, but a look flashing across his face tells me he doesn't agree. I almost will him to stop mimicking his father's words and be honest with what he thinks we should be doing.

"Easier to control you mean? We all know your father has been angling for supreme reign for years, and this sounds a lot like he's trying to force the packs into one place, so they're easier to police." Matteo verbalizes what I guess I was thinking and feeling, surprising me that I'm not the only one. Colton throws a dangerous look at Matteo, a growl in the undercurrent as he jumps to defensive over an insult aimed his father's way, but Matteo doesn't back down. "You know it Cole... you know how he is. Tell me it's better to coral people together when they have a device that can disable us all within one space and I'll drop it."

Matteo talks sense, and I agree. Bringing the people together means we're a sitting target if they use the same device. At least spread out we have a chance of escaping the effects and fighting back. They can't attack us all in one go with one those things, surely.

I catch Colton glancing my way, something flickering across his eyes as he thinks and then he turns back to Matteo. I miss the fleeting message in his look, not sure what it was meant to mean.

"Okay, maybe. I mean we always knew he would try and maneuver some sort of union around the mountain, I just didn't think he would physically expect them to move here. The device, we don't know enough to be able to second guess what it would do to us all in the valley. The range was limited in what we brought back." Colton is stiff, uneasy, and I can tell he doesn't like his pack questioning orders from above. He truly is hooked by the nose when it comes to his father, and I need to figure out how to get in there and remove the darn thing. Maybe I wasn't paired with Colton so he could save me from my life… maybe I'm meant to save him from his. The fates work in mysterious ways and thing's aren't always obvious.

“You can't keep tabs and instill fear into people if they're not close enough to feel your wrath." Radar butts in again, and it's not hard to see that when it comes to Juan Santo, Radar isn't completely loyal to his alpha. There's a hint of malice in that tone, definite sarcasm in what he said, and I glance to Colton to see if he reacts in any kind of way.

In fact, this whole conversation isn't all that friendly where Juan is concerned, and Colton isn't biting back in the way I expect. Outside, if anyone dared to offend his father, he would rip them a new one and leave their remains smeared across the mountain, so I'm a little surprised to find he lets them speak freely. I guess he respects them enough to let them be honest with their opinion, and nothing said is repeated outside of their circle of trust.

I'm envious for a moment, a longing of belonging I used to know well eating at me, and it pushes me to go sit in the corner on a stool by the bar. Listening, but not part of this as it's not my place, and they are not my pack. My opinions on this mean nothing.

"Whatever the reason… he wants us out tomorrow afternoon, driving to the other villages and changing minds." Colton gazes at the floor this time, that same twinge of jaw muscle and the color of his eyes glow a little amber for a second. A hint he isn't happy, his emotions in turmoil, as I feel them ebbing this way strongly and suddenly and it only takes a second to find out why.

"Is he really suggesting we apply force to families and children if they refuse to be homered?” It's Cesar who bursts out with it, outrage in his tone and almost accidence evicts Meadow from his lap with his aggressive thrust, who looks equally startled, adjusting her position with a frown at him.

Colton remains silent and the room falls into matched hush as they take it in. I can feel and taste the confusion and disgust, but no one wants to be the first to say it. I gawp at him, not sure I heard that right, but looking from ashen face to ashen face, of a group of people who all know what he means, it dawns on me that's exactly what Juan wants.

He expects his sub packs to go and forcefully move people from their homes and into the valley floor on the south side. In the name of protecting them from attacks, but the motive is bringing them in and taking control. Refusal will not be tolerated, and I wonder what kind of punishment he plans to exact. Juan is a cold bastard of a man and this isn't even as low as I expect he'll go. Juan always intended to push his agenda and now he's using the attack as his excuse. He hungers for power and reign across the packs and has been biding his time for so long.

They won't be any safer camping in the valley than they will in their own villages under the guard of patrols and watchers. Setting up alarm systems and training all who can fight how to do so is a better use of their time. They can all work together to safeguard and improve security from their own homes. How are they going to care for and cater for the hundreds who live around the mountain skirt if they dump them all in the center of the valley on this side?

There are enough Santos to successfully spread out and patrol the mountain every night after dark, the only time Vampires can come out. They can rest in the day. Raising an alarm is enough to get them there fast… the orphanage is proof that they can span miles in half the time of a human in a car, and if they had warning, they would move to get there in time. With patrols already out there, the people would have way more expectation of getting through it. It makes no sense to bring them here. Matteo is right; this is about control.

"What good is gathering us all in one place. Like Matteo said, they set off that machine and every one of us, corralled in the valley, will be rendered useless. No one will be able to turn or fight back. It's easier to massacre a race when we're all laid like fish in a bowl, and no Donnell be free of its effects if the only area we patrol is the valley. I'm sure they can make bigger, or use multiple, to hit us all at once." Jesus is now on his feet pacing, agitated, and getting worked up by the second. I'm starting to feel the restless unease spreading through them all like a virus, as they mumble their reactance and I keep looking to Colton to say something.

“This is pointless… you think I don't think the same and that I didn't try and reason with him? Nothing I said made a difference. It never does." Colton stands up, losing his temper, agitated too, and utterly drained. I can feel it coming off him intensely, and his eyes lock on mine again as he catches me across the room, ignoring Carmen throwing her own his way.

"Come on, Lorey. I need to show you to your new room. I'm too tired for this, and we all need to meet down at mess hall for dawn. Go to bed, you reprobates. Stop arguing with me because it's futile, and it's not my place to make you obey him. We need sleep."

I don't need to be asked twice. I jump up, suddenly a little too excited at being alone with him again and know it's because I've mentally taken another path and have a plan in place. One that hopefully involves those beefy arms around me and the sexy mouth on mine once again. I go to follow him as soon as he makes a move towards the door and almost gloat at the way Carmen's face crumbles.

"One of us could show her." She snaps bitterly, and he spins his head back, stares down at her with a blank expression and doesn't move a step further.

"Yeah you could… but that isn't what's happening. I want to do it." He shrugs with one shoulder, his tone icy cold and it seems to shut her up. Recoiling back as though she's been burned, and I can tell he's in no mood for more defiance or squabbling. Her eyes mist over with what I expect are fake tears, maybe not this time, and I really try hard to figure out what it is he ever saw in her. Carmen's a horrible person with a selfish spoiled attitude, and I really don't like her.

At least I now know why he's this way with her. The indifferent behavior and biting tone. Contraltos ego's wounded, his pride dented, and as much as I don't want to believe he had any feelings for her after we imprinted, I can feel the hurt in him radiating outwards. He maybe doesn't love her anymore in the way he used to, but he cared enough that he thought he could salvage their pairing until she hurt him. Her betrayal in that way cut him deep, and he's lost all respect and trust for her, which doesn't bode well in a sub pack.

Colton walks past me on the way to the door, catching my hand in his as he does so, making me jump as I was too busy looking at her and leads me out amid the happy joyous coo of Meadow

"Don't stay up too late… go to bed. Hers or yours, either is optional and fine by me, Chic as." She laughs in that raunchy cheeky way she has when she's being brazenly sexual, echoing behind us as we leave the room, and I blush crazily, trying not to look his way as I catch his eyes flick to me. Nervousness envelopes me once again and instantly I'm back to being awkward and shy.

Soon as we hit the corridor, he shuts the door and gives me a proper smile, swinging my hand in his like we're children and tugs me closer so we rub arms as we walk. Working our way out before hitting the main passage.

The closer I am to him, the more aware of how truly drained he is. It's seeping from every pore and despite the smile and the playful behavior, I can feel his stress levels are elevated crazily and his body is emitting a low depressive mood.

"You look really, good." He says it with a half-smile, one dimple on show and I shrug childishly, still not 'owning it' as Meadow would say.

"I'm not sure about the look, it feels kind of weird to be wearing such tight clothes." I squirm as I try to unwell the jeans from my butt gracefully, and he throws me a cheeky look as he watches me attempt it.

"Want some help?” it's a grin, a smooth move kind of flippant comment made by the males who walk around like cockerels in a hen house, and not an actual serious question. It's obvious he expects my usual rebuff, but instead I throw a smile back his way, swallow down the utter nerves and butterflies he's hitting me with and nod, in the way Meadow showed me. She gave me a crash course in simple flirting, while doing my hair earlier, and I throw on the sexy smile and flutter my lashes, butting in against him coyly.

"If you like." I bite on my lower lip, not sure if I'm doing it right, but his reaction, I guess, says I am.

Colton trips over an imaginary piece of carpet, and coughs, to cover his clumsy response, immediately less confident, perplexed, and failing at Mr. smooth, all in one fell swoop. Cocky but not actually willing to follow through.

“Not the response I was expecting." He frowns, swallows a little obviously, and fixes his eyes ahead of us while he regains his previous composure.

It's not like I couldn't tell, and I throw a one shouldered coquettish shrug, absolutely dying inside with how weird and fake this feels. I've never flirted or played games with boys. I never had any interest in doing it before Colton.

Colton turns away, seemingly putting a little distance between us and the opposite of what I was going for as he points us up a flight of stairs.

"This way, you should memorize the route so you can find it again." His tone is distant, his mood not exactly what I expected, and I sigh at the deflated mood that hits me heavily.

We're away from the main hall and the grand sweeping staircase, and in some back corridor with narrow steps to the next floor. Every wall painted beige, dark wood floors, and potted plants dotted around prettily. They have even started replacing windows up here, and one newly glazed one is letting light shine through. Colton begins leading the way, his hand no longer in mine as he slides in front of me to climb the stairs, and I suddenly feel awkward and shy that my attempt at flirting backfired badly.

I don't get it. He's meant to be completely hot for me and yet acts like a coy virgin who doesn't do well with girls at my first attempt of encouragement. I know for a fact he's not a virgin, and not inexperienced with girls, I have all his memories. He seems all too hyper focused on where we're going and no longer on my presence. His mood still weird and now he's making me feel the same way. Sort of sad, depressed, and a bit tetchy and unsociable.

"Here, this door on the right. This used to be Tartary room, but she mated up and now lives with Franco, her mate on the third floor. Room's all yours." Colton steps in front of a large dark wood door, tucked into a tiny alcove in an airy part of the hall that widens out, using a key card and motions for my hand when he slides it into the machine.

"Hand here, and it'll save your print for future use. No card or key necessary." He throws me a courteous quick lipped smile, takes my wrist, lifts my hand, and holds it on the smooth black panel, pressing in digits as he does so and then yanks the card out before it flashes red and beeps. He lets my hand go quickly, as though he doesn't want to be here holding it anymore, and I can sense his urgency in wanting to leave. It brings me down with a thud and a seriously painful ache in the chest.

“Not hidden away in the west wing anymore? I ask quietly, sounding as somber as his mood, looking for something to engage him in conversation with, because I literally feel his intentions of sneaking away and leaving me to my new room, and it sucks. He's disconnecting form me, shutting me out and it's shredding my soul to pieces as it becomes clear that's what he's doing.

"He wasn't happy that I decided you should be among the rest of us, and part of this pack, seeing as he's trying to unite the mountain. Convinced him your showdown was under better control and wouldn't happen again." Colton avoids my eye, obviously not really telling me everything that was said.

"And he gave in, just like that?” I hate the fact that I can sense he's being evasive and keeping things from me.

"Not exactly. Sometimes I'm good at arguing my corner. Sometimes…” Colton looks away, seemingly defeated as though tonight has taken a toll on him. Whatever was said to his father, I can sense his strained emotion, and weary mood coming at me like a fog the longer we stand here.

"Just tell me… I'm a big girl, I can take it." I sigh, desperate with a raw, pleading tone, letting my frustration out, and I catch the flicker of hesitation before he sighs.

"He doesn't care that you have a special gift. He wouldn't entertain the topic. Shut me down and bombarded me with his disappointment in my lack of putting my pack, and my responsibility, first." His crestfallen face and the surge of pain that hits me in the chest tells me his father's words wounded him. It serves to remind me though, that this is not all about him doing the right thing, it's also about pleasing someone he looks up to and loves and has always obeyed. As he's meant to.

He swings the door open and steps aside, making it clear he's depositing me like a gentleman, and nothing else. He's done talking about this and he isn't going to argue about it either. No usual Colton touchy fee, no intimacy, or any kind of anything. He just steps back and holds it wide as the lights flicker on automatically. Putting space between us and fixing a look on me that screams more of commander, than boy that loves me. He's closing off, shutting me out and my heart starts to bleed.

“If you need anything, then mind link me. There's food in your room, I had it put here before I came to the communal. Enjoy your dinner and get some rest. I'll come for you at dawn." It's empty and devoid of emotion. He moves to leave as I step inside but panic grips a sudden response out of me. That churning nausea that he's being like this, slicing at my guts and ripping my soul in two.

"Colton… what have I done?” I blurt it out like a needy sad Carmen type, and he pauses, frowns, stopping mid step and turns back at me with a very noticeable wince of pain flashing across his face. It kills some of the sterile stance and he seems to sag a little.

"You haven't done anything. It's me. My father wants me to stand up and take my place. He wants me to mark Carmen at the next moon and resolve what he calls, our little issue. Nothing I say makes a difference, he won't bend, so maybe it's better for us to keeps our distance and hope that something changes, or that my marking her kills our bond." He's deflated, as broken as he's making me, looking so much younger and vulnerable than his years in this moment, and giving up so easily. My instinct is to get mad and yell at him, like I've done so many times already in our short acquaintance, but my plan of earlier pushes through, reminding me that he's lost and set afloat right now. He's in pain too, and struggling to navigate it as much as I am. So much weighing on his shoulders that I don't understand and can't see.

I need to bring him in and secure him to my harbor. Stop letting him pull all the ropes alone, stop expecting him to sail against the storm without direction, making all the moves. Don't push, even if my instinct is to feel disappointed in him and seethe with anger. I need to stop, breathe, and look at him another way. As someone who needs gentle coaxing and nurturing. He's stubborn, he's bound by duty, but I have his heart, all of it, and I need to help that power grow from inside out.

I lower my tone, gently whispering as I cross towards him, fighting my own nerves and inexperience, and putting faith in the fact I know he loves me. Taking my cue from Meadow.

I step across the gap and raise myself on tip toes to reach him, laying one hand flat on his muscular chest, and lifting the other to his jaw gently. Eyes resting on his, locking onto him the way that always does and makes me feel safe. My own heart swelling, my body tingling with the nearness of him.

"Don't give up on us." I breathe it out, almost against his lips, I get so close. Insides somersaulting with the need to kiss him. I run my fingers up his cheek and cup his face, pulling him close, so softly, my mouth grazes his lips and I feel him physically sag into my touch, greedily. Melting against my briefest connection, his pupils dilating as I bring his forehead to mine. No matter what he says, or how he acts, his truth is always in our touch, and he cannot deny the affect is has on both of us. That need to fluidly pour into one another and inability to fight when we touch.

"I'm not worthy of you…. Today showed me that." It's husky, strained, and low. It's self-pity and exhaustion. Defeat, because his father's knocked him down once more, and left him reeling from cruel words. I refuse to accept what he's saying as truth to what he's feeling, and instead of anger, I lean up and press my lips gently to his. Startling him with the sudden contact and refusing to back down.

It takes a second of pause, his body going rigid before he relaxes, pushes his face forward to fully kiss me and his hand comes to slide around the back of my neck as he takes over. It doesn't take much to ignite fire in him and I groan as he gives me what I'm yearning for.

Kissing him is so familiar and as I open my mouth to let things progress quickly, all those feelings and crazy urges rush back like a massive tidal wave hitting the shore. So easy to become consumed and intoxicated with need when we're touching this way. My lips parting wider, to give him access as his tongue slides against mine and he kisses me with passion and expertise that makes my toes curl and my stomach tingle.

Colton stirs against me, his body easing against mine, relaxing into the hold we have on one another and meeting my groan with his own murmured growl of enjoyment. We're made to kiss one another, and I can't imagine anyone ever tasting this good or making me feel this complete. Neither can deny our bond when we kiss, it's potent and all consuming.

Just as his hands begin to slide down my back and over my ass, bringing my pelvis to his, hinting at his sexual excitement, he stops abruptly. Catching himself, he pulls away fast, so suddenly he literally rips us apart and I'm stunned with the sudden release, eyes flickering open to find myself tottering on unsure legs. He steps back, fully releasing me, almost letting me topple with the sudden loss of support, but I catch myself on the nearby door frame, breathless, and panting with how hot that make out session was and glance up at his shell-shocked expression.

"We shouldn't… it's only going to make this harder." He closes right back down inside of his own head. That softness of his expression, the dilated pupils and stirring body. It all reels back at speed as he regains perfect control. I, however, am fire dep and burning with crazy heat, which triggers severe frustration at the sudden halt.

"I disagree. I think we should take what time we have and no regrets with it. My body yearns for you, and I could feel it was mutual. We're doing nothing wrong in the eyes of the fates. This is what they wanted for us. Stay with me tonight, share my bed, give us something more than this." It's brazen for me, and I swear I hear Meadows voice in my head, egging me on as the words tumble out. A confidence growing that I never knew I could possess, and a shameless need to see this through. I'm all in and willing to lose my virginity tonight. In fact, I want it badly.

I don't care if I'm not marked, I'll let him in my bed and make him bond to me in other ways if it makes him start fighting for his right. Sex will bind us, and I'm willing to use any tool to get my mates head out of his ass.

"I can't. I'm sorry." Colton can't look me in the eye, and I can feel the agony waving his way from me. The turmoil, the regret, the confusion as he fights his own will power. My boy's screwed up in the head and fighting with his own emotions and morals. I realize this is going to be tougher than I thought, and it's not just Juan's command. Contraltos fighting with his own inner voice, about what's right, and what he should do. I can taste the indecision as it's thick enough around me to color the air.

He steps forward, eyes still downcast and surprises me with a fast, fleeting, yet soft kiss on the forehead that renders me mute. A moment of his gentle affectionate side to let me know he does care, even if his refusal makes it seem otherwise.

"It's not that I don't want you… just please, don't hate me." He doesn't wait for an answer, turns on his heel rapidly and heads back the way we came, at speed, not looking back, wounding me with how much he' fighting this. My heart thuds through my chest, stomach in knots as I watch him go, but I remind myself that I'm not a girl who falls at the first hurdle, and I won't give up.

If you change your mind, my door, for you, will always be open. I'm not giving up on us.

My mind link follows him out of sight, my heart aching harder the further he gets away, and I'm close to tears but bite them back. Refusing to break down and be weak over this. Colton needs strength and I 'm going to prove I have a lot of it.

I survived my family's death and my makeshift pack's. I'm tougher than I ever gave myself credit for, and it's time I started to own that.

I wait for what seems like an eternity of agonizing silence in the air, until he's far out of reach emotionally, and the sounds of his footsteps on wood have drifted hopelessly away. I almost break down and cry when no response comes at all, desolate, and alone, when he delivers that one little ray of hope.

I love you, Lorey. I won't give up on us either.