Chapter 232 The last moments

**Asher's POV**

I was in the dark for so long. I couldn't feel anything. I had one memory only. I was laying there, and I could see my Olivia. She was beautiful as always, but this time her face was full of worry. I didn't know what to do or feel. The memories of her wasn't real, for sure. I knew she was living a happy life. She finally returned to Walter, and he got accepted by my only son, Aiden, as well. 

To think about it hurt me more than anything. That was the thought that made me don't mind passing away. My pack left me finally. Even if they had agreed to come back with me, I knew my pack would never be the same as before. We needed to do a lot in there. We needed to clean it, maybe build it up again. We needed to get everything to work, and probably the fields needed a lot. As I had no stronger werewolves left in the pack, I just couldn't see that it was possible to rebuild everything. 

There was my family. What I could do with that? Olivia was a perfect woman. She came from another age, where women found a partner for a lifetime. She used to live with Walter, and she decided to break up with him, because she wasn't happy. Later she found me, but as she thought she had lost me, she decided to go back to Walter. I didn't blame her. She had a little one to raise, and Aiden like Walter a lot. It wasn't hard for him to accept him as his father. And Walter would have been a fool not to accept them. Actually, I knew he was in love with Olivia still. I saw that many times when he stared at her. He loved her for sure. 

So, I have lost my family as well. Probably, if I was back to life, because of Olivia's nature, even if she was still in love with me, I didn't think she would leave Walter for me. She wouldn't do that to him twice, and she wouldn't do that to Aiden either. Aiden would love me just like before, but he loved his Mother so much, that he wouldn't blame her for doing that. I could probably be a weekend father, but would that be good for Aiden? Probably not, as he would need to choose which community he wants to belong to. Certainly, as he would be raised by vampires, vampire rules and life would be the normal for him, and he wouldn't want to live like a werewolf. I couldn't blame him for that, either. 

So, what will I have? Actually, nothing. I felt like nothing. I couldn't have a loving family, I couldn't have a pack. 

Knowing I have lost everything made me feel horrible. Even if the doctors would put me together, I didn't think I would be a fit werewolf again. Maybe the damages my body suffered were just none reversible. Now, in that case, what I would be? An injured, maybe paralysed werewolf who had nothing. 

The picture of her was the one in my head which I kept recalling. Somehow here expression was worrying. She worried about me, but probably she was worrying about me as her son's father, and not as her lover, and partner. 

The other thing was bothered me was, if I was staying alive, my lifetime. Olivia and Aiden would live forever, and I would be the one to pass away way before them. Not long ago, Olivia was talking about our future that would last forever. And now, I meant nothing for her either. 

To see her face made me calm somehow. I felt her cold hand caressed me, and somehow, that felt like angels would touch my tortured skin. It was hard to keep my eyes open. However, I didn't want to close them either. I wanted to watch her pretty face as long as it was possible. I wanted to take it with me, and I hoped the Moon Goddess will let me have her picture with me as well. 

As the time passed, I was even more certain it was only my imagination that played with me. There wasn't anyone in that dirty, cold room with me. It was only my brain that showed me pictures like that. 

Even if I knew that it was only my imagination, I was calmed knowing that at least in my mind she was with me in the last moments of my life. 

I tried to reopen my eyes so many times; I wanted to remember every single detail of her face. I wanted to watch it as long as possible. I didn't know what she wanted to do with me, but I felt she was lifting my hand up. I was surprised to feel her cold lips on my skin. I didn't know if she wanted to kiss it, or perhaps she just wanted to taste my blood. Actually, I was dying after all, so probably she thought she could have that part of me, before I passed away. And with that she could force my battle to end sooner, so I didn't need to suffer more. 

I wanted her to have it. If I could die like I gave her the most happiness a vampire could have, then I was ready to give that to her. For the last time. 

I focused on my skin, as I loved to feel her lips on it. It cooled it down, and it made me shiver, when I felt her fangs gently touching my skin there. I wanted it to happen. Somewhat, I found it so erotic, like when we were together in bed. I didn't know why I have never asked her to bite me while we were intimate. That would have been the perfect satisfaction for her, I guess. I was eager to feel her fangs in my flesh, and I didn't know why she was waiting for so long. I wanted to encourage her, but my eyes didn't open any more, and the picture of her disappeared.