07 | ghost of you

Chapter Seven. Ghost of you.

Mabigat ang paghinga ni Galen dahil sa kaba. He told himself he’s not going in her execution but he couldn’t stop himself. The time has come. It’s his birthday.

“Nak, saan ka pupunta? Hipan mo muna ‘tong cake mo---” natigil si Gina sa pagtawag sa anak dahil padabog nitong isinarado ang pinto ng bahay nila bago pa man siya makasunod dito. Madilim pa ang kalangitan ng iwan siya ng anak niya sa bahay nila.

Pansin niya ang pag-iiba ng ugali ng anak niya nitong mga nakaraang araw. Lagi itong umiiyak. Naririnig niya gabi-gabi. Gustuhin man niyang magtanong kung anong dahilan, matagal nang lumayo ang loob sa kanya ng anak niya dahil sa paghihiwalay niya sa kanilang dalawa ni Vhallerine. Hanggang ngayon ay kino-konsensya pa rin ang matanda tungkol doon. Alam niyang iyon ang dahilan kung bakit ayaw magpakasal ni Galen kahit ireto siya sa mga magagandang babae na may mayayamang pamilya at kahit pa nakapagtapos ng may karangalan.

She opened the door. Nakita niya ang mabilis na pagsakay ni Galen sa kanyang sasakyan. Nagmamadali ito at tila may hinahabol. Ano naman kaya ito? Birthday na birthday niya ay aalis ito? Baka naman may nakilala na itong bagong babae na nobya kaya roon magse-celebrate ng kanyang birthday?

Hinintay niya ang pag-alis ng sasakyan nito bago siya sumunod gamit ang sasakyan niya.

Pumasok agad sa loob si Galen. Hinarang agad siya ng mga security officer doon. Ipinakita niya agad ang marriage certificate nila ni Vhallerine dahil siya lang ang pwedeng makasaksi noon. Walang ibang pamilya si Vhal kundi siya lamang.

“Hindi ba’t iyon iyong abogado nung nagsampa ng kaso?” Tanong nung isang lalaking naka-uniform.

“Oo. Mag-asawa pala sila?”

Nagmakaawa na si Galen sa harap nila. He kneeled and cried in front of them, begging to stop the execution. He even told them it’s his birthday and even made them see his birth certificate as a proof. Parang nawawala na siya sa tamang wisyo niya. Natigil lamang siya nang makita ang mukha ni Vhallerine sa harapan.

Unti-unting humiga roon si Vhallerine. Her tears are falling. She knows it’s the end. And she knows he’s watching. She’s inside the lab now.

“Don’t… Watch.” Vhallerine used sign language to communicate with Galen behind the glass.

He knows she couldn’t see him, but still, she managed to think about him even in her last minutes.

“Ang… daya…” Galen finally gave up. His tears fell slowly. “What did we do to deserve this?” He asked himself.

Bago pa turukan si Vhallerine nang kung anong pampawala ng kanyang kamalayan at nang hindi na mahirapan, pinahinto niya ito. She whispered something to the person. The lady nodded.

Vhallerine smiled at the glass with her tears that never stopped falling. She then used sign language again to communicate with his beloved husband who is now currently watching her die. In his own birthday. The man she asked for him to win the case for her, because she knew that the family opposing her is powerful and he might get endangered. So she chose to say goodbye with her guilts in this lifetime and finally stop the pain. For him to live more comfortably.

That day, they both knew that after their goodbye, they won’t see each other again like before. Vhallerine’s leaving him again. But this time, not for some place with her abusive mother, but some place where she can find peace.

“I, I love… you.” Ngumiti si Vhallerine pagkasabi niya noon gamit ang sign language. “Take care of yourself. See you later.” Dagdag pa niya.

Galen smiled shakily. He used sign language too.

“I love you, take care, see you later.”

Kahit hindi iyon makita ni Vhallerine ay alam na niya na ginawa iyon ni Galen. She looked at the lady and nodded. She slowly closed her eyes.

Galen covered his eyes, his mouth, his face. To stop himself from sobbing loudly. He couldn’t do it. He thinks he couldn’t.

Nawalan ng malay si Vhallerine, humiga siya sa putting higaan habang nakatali ang mga kamay.

“Magkikita ulit tayo… Pangako.”

Lethal injection. They injected the first drug with the machine connected to her vains on her arms. He closed his eyes, forcing himself to look. Even if it breaks him inside. Even it breaks his soul.

Bumagsak ang kamay ni Vhallerine na may singsing. He cried harder. Hindi na niya makilala ang sarili niyang boses dahil sa sakit. Hindi niya alam kung makakaabot pa siya sa pangatlong injection kung ganito pa lang na sa unang turok ay sira na siya.

And then the second drug was injected. Then the last one.

And she was gone.

Galen claimed his wife’s body. He felt numb. Hindi manlang niya namalayan na nasa tabi niya na pala si Gina at niyayakap siya nang maghigpit. Nalaman pala nito ang nangyari. Mas lalo itong nakunsensya nang makita ang hawak ni Galen na marriage certificate nila ni Vhallerine at ang birth certificate niya na nagpapatunay na birthday niya ngayon.

Isasakay pa lang sana ni Gina si Galen sa loob ng kotse nang pinahinto sila ng isang police officer. Galen then turned to the man without any expression on his face. His tears didn’t dry. It’s still falling, but without expression.

“Galen?” The man asked Gina and pointed at Galen.

Gina confusedly nodded.

“Vhallerine Zaldien asked to give you these letters.” Inilahad nito ang mga maliliit envelope kay Gina tsaka ipinakita ang isang backpack na luma na at butas-butas. “This is her belongings.”

Gina glanced at Galen who’s only looking at them and then smiled at the man. “Thank you.”

The man gave her a small smile and nodded before going.

“Galen anak, baka gusto mong basahin---”

“Umuwi na tayo, ma,”

“Pero galing ‘to kay Vhallerine---”

“Itapon mo. Ganoon naman ang nasa isip mo, ‘di ba? Ba’t ‘di mo gawin?” That was the first time they spoke again after Galen became a lawyer. Pero ngayon ay ganoon pa ang tono niya.

Nasaktan talaga siya. Alam iyon ni Gina. Naiintindihan niya na ganoon ang iniisip ng anak niya dahil sa nangyari ilang taon na ang nakakaraan. Wala siyang sama ng loob kay Galen dahil simula pa nung una ay siya ang may kasalanan ng lahat. She’s aware of her son’s pain after they couldn’t find Vhallerine in their house. She thought it will fade after sometime but it never did.

Pumunta sa driver’s seat si Gina at siya ang nagdrive. Ipapakuha na lang niya sa kapatid ni Galen na si Galilei ang kotse nitong naiwan doon.

Hindi siya matigil sa pagtingin sa kanyang anak sa rear view mirror. She keep on glancing at him. He’s silently crying while looking outside the window. Her heart broke for him. She couldn’t afford to see her son cry. Specially that’s not like Galen. He doesn’t cry. She never seen him cry, except when he was a baby.

Si Gina na ang gumawa ng paraan para magkaroon ng leave sa trabaho si Galen. Hinanap naman siya agad ng kaibigan nitong si David.

“Mag-usap tayo, Zaldien,” seryosong sabi ni Tamizen.

“Attorney, I don’t think it’s the right time. He’s still grieving for his wife---”

“Nahihibang ka na ba, Galen?” May sakit sa tono ni David nang itanong niya iyon kay Galen na nakayuko lang habang nakaupo sa mahabang sofa sa kanilang bahay. Nasa pinto pa lang ay umaalingawngaw na ang boses ng kaibigan niya. “May nakakita sa ‘yo, ikaw iyong sumira ng gulong ng sasakyan nila Vhallerine?”

Galen looked up at him. Nanghahamon ang tingin niya sa kanyang kaibigan. “Eh ano ngayon?” He asked, like he has nothing to lose.

Kinwelyuhan siya ni David, dahilan para mapatayo siya.

“Ano ba sa tingin mo ang ginagawa mo, ha? Sino ba ‘yung Vhallerine na ‘yon? Iyon ba ‘yung babaeng sinasabi mo---”

“Oo! Iyon ‘yung babaeng sinasabi ko! Asawa ko ‘yon!” He started crying again, feeling helpless.

“David anak…” Sinubukan ni Gina na pakalmahin ito.

David slowly loosened it up. He sighed.

“Nag-aalala lang ako sa ‘yo, pre,” napahawak siya sa kanyang ulo. “Hindi lang dahil nasa firm kita, pero dahil bilang kaibigan mo. May nakakakita sa ‘yo na gumawa no’n. Binayaran ko na lang kasi alam kong mabuti ang gusto mong gawin. Kilala kita, eh. Kaso mali ‘yung ginawa mo. Paano na pag nahuli ka?”

Galen didn’t speak. David licked his lips.

“I’m sorry,” agad na sabi nito.

Galen just nodded, didn’t stop crying. Lumapit si Gina para yakapin ang anak at pakalmahin. He didn’t make a sound like before. He’s just silently crying.

Umupo si David sa tabi niya. “Sorry, pre. Condolence. Nag-aalala lang talaga ako. Sorry…” Hinagod nito ang likod ng kanyang kaibigan. “I’m really sorry, Galen. Now I understand. It’s okay… You can cry.”

Binitawan ni Gina si Galen para makayakap sa kaibigan.

All of his life, Galen was told not to cry by his dad because they said it’s not for ‘boys’. But now, he doesn’t care. He wants to cry. He wants to grieve. He wants his wife back.