Chapter Twelve— Fade Out

I woke up clutching something soft. I snuggled up to it and forced my eyes open. The blurriness went away after a few seconds and I sat up. I was in Nickolas’ room. I was in his bed.

Where the hell was he? I was in the middle of the bed, so I know he wasn’t sleeping next to me. Not that he would. He had to know I was here. Did I have a furious boy waiting for me somewhere in this house?

There was something black on the bed and I picked it up. A dress. It was pretty. Black and very simple. Why was this here? Stupid question. I was supposed to wear it. I was also draped in a hoodie I didn’t remember falling asleep with.

I got up and went to shower. I hurried, because I didn’t know when Nickolas was coming back. I got out and slipped the dress on, and it fit perfectly on me. It hit my knees and flowed loosely all around me.

I left the room and went looking for Nickolas and Dahlia. I smelled bacon and I followed that into the kitchen. He wasn’t in there, but Dahlia was. She sat at the table, eating scrambled eggs.

“Wow.” She smiled. “You look pretty, Posey.”

“Thank you.” I curtsied. “Um...” I moved closer and lowered my voice. “Is this your mommy’s dress?” She seemed a little tall for it, but that didn’t mean it wasn’t possible. Where else would Nickolas get a dress?

She finished chewing. “Nope. It’s Nicky’s mommy’s dress.”

My mouth dropped open. I was in his dead mother’s dress. Because he gave it to me to wear… I didn’t know what to do with that.

Nickolas came back into the room and he didn’t look at me as he went to the stove. He started cooking and I couldn’t even be sure he knew I was here. But Dahlia took care of that for me.

“Nicky, doesn’t Posey look pretty?” she asked.

He turned to look at me and I knew it was just for her. “Yes, very pretty.” He turned back around.

“Thanks.” I stood at the counter next to him. Say something… I tried to will it with my mind but I wasn’t getting anywhere.

“Scrambled or omelet?” he asked without looking at me.

“Nickolas,” I said.

“Scrambled, or omelet?” he asked again, colder than before.

“Am I wearing your mother’s dress?”

He set the spatula down and shut off the stove. Then he turned his head to me. “Yeah. Yeah you are. Do you want something else to wear?”

I shook my head. “No.”

His eyes softened. “I thought it would fit.”

The shorts fit. His shirt fit. He could have given me something other than this. He made this choice and I wanted to know why. But I wouldn’t ask.

“Well, it does.” Clever. “Thanks. I’ll get it back to you tomorrow at school. I can wash it first if you want.”

He shook his head and went back to cooking. “Keep it.”

My eyebrows shot up. “Huh?”

“You can keep it.”

“W-why? Why would you let me keep this?”

He looked to me again. “Either you wear it or it lives in a box. I’d rather you have it. At least that way, it can see the sun again.”

His heart was cold enough to freeze vodka on the very best of days, but he wasn’t naïve. He had to understand the gravity of this. I did.

“When are you supposed to go home, Posey?” Dahlia asked.

“Not too long.” I spoke to Nickolas. “I can get out of your hair soon. Thank you,” I paused. “For, everything.” I knew it was just for Dahlia, but still, it was kind of him.

“No problem, Cupcake,” he sighed and finished up an omelet.

The vibe was weird. Dahlia didn’t have a clue, but I was hyper aware of it. Nickolas sat beside me, and didn’t talk to me directly. He’d brush up against me when he walked, but he wouldn’t look at me. It wasn’t cold, as much as it was hesitant and sure at the same time.

Dahlia was down for her nap and Nickolas and I were alone in the living room. I was waiting on a text from Patton, telling me they were home. Shouldn’t be long now.

I twisted my ring as I sat on the other side of the couch, facing Nickolas. I didn’t know if we had things to talk about, but it felt like we did. Lots of stuff happened over this weekend. More than ever should have. I felt like I knew him a lot better now, and I wasn’t sure that was a good thing. My time here was short. I was scared that getting attached to people, to Dahlia, would only hurt in the end.

“Are we...” I paused. “Okay?”

Nickolas looked from the floor to me. “What do you mean okay? Were we ever really okay?”

“Good point. I mean, well, things are a little different now.”

“How so?”

Was he playing dumb? “For starters, I let you get to second base, I saw you naked, saw you change into a wolf, and confirmed that I’m an immortal supernatural creature that doesn’t quite have a handle on her powers.”

He scratched the side of his head. “What are you asking me? If we’re friends? If we’re something else?”

“I guess so.”

His eyes went to the ceiling. “Well, you forced second base on me, by the way.” Damn skippy. And I have no regrets.

“I’m aware.”

“Not something to base a friendship on.”

I smiled. “We’re not really made to be friends.”

He nodded. “True. But we have an issue. One that’s asleep in her bedroom and probably dreaming about picnics with the three of us.”

“I know. How do we handle that?”

“She’ll be broken hearted if you don’t come by anymore.”

And how would you feel if I didn’t come by anymore? “What does that mean for us then?”

A knock on the door broke the conversation. It felt like we were drenched with ice water. I jumped and Nickolas tensed as he turned his body to the door. “Stay here,” he ordered me with protectiveness and possession.

He rose to get the door and I turned around. I sat up on my knees to watch what was probably just be a salesman getting yelled at. When he opened the door, I watched him go from tense to angry.

“Nick.” Nash smiled. “How are you?”

“I was doing fine until you came over.”

“Thank you for inviting me in,” he passed Nickolas and stepped into the house. “Oh.” His grin changed when he saw me. “Posey, didn’t think to see you here.”

“Long story.”

He looked sideways at Nickolas. “I didn’t know you were seeing each other. Have you been together long?”

Nickolas was quicker than a bullet. “We’re not together. I gave her a place to stay. She’s leaving soon.”

Nash still spoke to me. “Oh, if you needed a place, I would have let you stay in my hotel with me. I wish I’d known.”

Me too.

“You can leave, Nash,” Nickolas said with crossed arms. “The answer is, and always will be no. She’s mine and mine alone.”

He wasn’t talking about me. I knew that. So why did I wish he was?

“It would be better for her there,” Nash rebutted. “You know it. She belongs with her own kind. We can keep her safe.”

Nickolas looked back at me for a second. “Can you just go, please?”

“I can’t.”

I sat up straighter. “Care to fill me in, boys? Or are you just gonna start hitting each other with no context.”

Nickolas sighed and Nash stood by me at the couch. “Well, love, I’m the representative for my organization. And all we want is to keep young Dahlia safe from the horrors of this world. Nick refuses to let us.”

I tensed at his mention of Dahlia and Nickolas noticed. Her name in anyone else’s mouth was almost a threat. It made me ready to attack.

“What the fuck are you talking about?” I asked with a healthy dose of attitude.

“Have you accepted your fae status yet?”

I arched a brow. “Yeah. And I know what you are too. Thanks for not filling me in on the whole story by the way. I’ll send you the shrink bill.”

Nickolas smirked.

Nash kept his face cool. “Well, can’t go spilling all my secrets at once. I have to protect my menagerie.”

I sighed. “Okay, I’ll bite.”

He smiled and stepped closer to me. “It’s a community that Lucien’s live in. We all stay together, live together in a safe place.”

“And you run one?”

“I’m second in command,” his face had pride. “And all I want is for Dahlia to come home.”

“Hmm… I think she is home.”

Nickolas was at my side in an instant. “I agree.”

I held a hand up. “Why do you want her anyway? And how do you know about her?”

Nash eyed me. “You’re just full of questions, aren’t you?”

“Maybe I am.”

My words seemed to lighten him up. “I like when a little girl has a big attitude. So I’ll tell you. The menagerie I help run is the same one that Mr. Weaver came from. Dahlia is our family, and she belongs with us.”

I looked to a fuming Nickolas. “What about him,” I nodded to the boy. “Does he not belong there?”

Nash answered. “He’s nearly of age. He can make his own choices.”

“But not for his sister?”

Nash wasn’t bothered. “I just want her safe. As does the rest of the residents.”

Nickolas stepped between us. “This is over. She’s not going anywhere. I can take care of her just fine. I don’t see your little place as any different than a colony. Just because your people have a little more freedom doesn’t mean it’s any better.”

“It’s not the same and you know it. We don’t force people to stay. You know that. Both of your parents left their menageries and it was left at that.”

“If it was left at that, then why are you here?”

“We look out for our own.”

The men were getting hostile in an eerily polite way. Like they were both trying to be the last one to start yelling. There was no budging. Nothing would change the fact that Dahlia was Nickolas’. Nash had no real say in this.

Nickolas was right in Nash’s face. “This is my home. My sister is sleeping in the other room. What do I have to do to get it through your head that you can’t have her?”

“She’s already ours. Her blood is linked to us. Just because your father left doesn’t mean that is no longer true.”

“It does. Leave. I don’t want to see you again.”

Nash sighed. “This is what’s best for her. Do the selfless thing for once, Nick.”

Nickolas looked at me with weariness. “I never let myself do the selfish thing. So, would you kindly fuck off out of my house?”

Nash turned to me with a sigh. “Until next time, love.” He kissed my forehead and walked out of the house.

My eyes were wide but I wasn’t seeing anything. The next thing that came into focus was Nickolas. He was staring at the door like he was hoping it would combust. His hands were fists at his sides and I understood the rage. Nash was trying to get his sister. That could set anyone off.

I moved off of the couch and tried calming him down. I put my hand on his shoulder and affectionately scratched at him. “Nickolas.” His stance changed at my voice, so I spoke again. “Can I do anything for you?”

He looked like he wanted to say something, but he thought better of it. He took my hand and tugged me into his room. He let go of me the second we were in.

“I should practice,” he said in a distant voice.

“Practice what—”

Dammit. He picked up his guitar and the sheet music and brought it to his bed. The bed that I might be naked in, in about thirty seconds.

“This,” he held up the music.

“Ah.” I swallowed air. Maybe I could distract myself with something. “I can start on our essay. Can I use your computer?”

He pulled it off his nightstand and set it on the bed, as if I was supposed to sit beside him. He sat down and started reading the music.

I got in bed next to him and shivered. It was kind of freezing in the room and I was in a short dress.

Nickolas handed me his hoodie. “Put it on.”

I did. Still cold. “Can I get under the covers?”

“Sure.” He started trying to tune the guitar while I buried myself in his blankets. I pulled them up to my chest and put the computer on my lap.

I hit a few buttons and a lock screen came up. “Can you enter your password?”

He set the guitar on his lap and leaned over me. His fingers found the keys and he quickly typed them in, then hit Enter.

I smiled. “Your password is Chewie’s home planet?”

He smirked at his guitar. “Nice catch.”

I opened a Word document and started in on the stupid essay, ignoring Nickolas as he strummed. He was trying to fix the tuning but something was just off and he knew it.

“It’s the E chord,” I told him.

His brow furrowed and he tweaked it. Then he tested it. Still off. I moved the laptop from me and stole his guitar, laying it over me. I turned the tuning peg and plucked the chord. Then I strummed the thing. Even unplugged I loved the sound. Then Nickolas plugged it into the mini amp he kept beside his bed. It came to life and I almost whimpered, then I strummed it again.

“You know all the chords?” he asked.

I nodded. “Yup. I can put one of these things together and take it apart, but I’ve held one twice in my life.”

“That means little. You should try and play.”

I scoffed. “I’d be awful.”

“You don’t know till you try. Here.” He grabbed me by the hips and sat me between his legs. No warning at all. He pulled my back against his chest and put my hands where they needed to be on the guitar. “Try the first part of the song.”

I looked at the chords I needed to know and I practiced. It hurt my fingers and I played until I almost cut myself. “Jeez.” I looked at my fingers.

“Takes a while to get these.” Nickolas put his hand in front of me, palm up. His fingers had calluses on every tip. I touched them with my own fingertips. He reacted reflexively and his fingers bent. Then he relaxed his hand, but I stopped.

I tried the chords again and I held the guitar closer to my body. Nickolas rested his hand on my thigh and I don’t know why I let him. Maybe I was too distracted to care.

“Like this,” he said, using his other hand to play.

I looked up at him since I was pressed against him. “You can play with one hand?”

He shrugged. “I’m a man of many talents.”

He kept playing and it sent my lady parts all aflutter. I was practically on his lap as he played. That was far more than I needed to get all hot and bothered. I didn’t know how I wasn’t on top of him in that moment.

Nickolas’ other hand started moving up, and I almost didn’t notice. It was so slow the entire time. His fingertips brushed the inside of my thigh and somehow, he kept playing without a pause or a hint that he was doing something else.

He was messing with me, that was what he did. He liked upsetting me because my reactions were entertaining. So when he touched the front of my underwear, I knew I had to stop this. Still, I hesitated because the sensation was… beyond words.

“I’m sure you can play a lot better without me here.” I laughed it off and moved back to the spot I was in. His face gave nothing away as he moved the guitar to his lap, taking my spot.

I went back to doing out homework and because I was forcing myself to focus on that instead of the guitar playing that was causing parts of me to burn, I got four pages done in an hour. Almost halfway there. I still didn’t have a clue what the visual was, but it was a problem for another day.

My phone vibrated and I picked it up from the nightstand on my side of the bed. It was from Patton.

“Your boyfriend texting you?” Nickolas asked a little too casually.

“Who’s my boyfriend?”

He glared at my phone, then me. “Nash. Last time it came up, you were contemplating screwing him in a parking lot.”

Ah, that was true. “He doesn’t have my number. My foster father wants to know if I want to go to dinner with them. They’ll be home in a half hour.”

I thought he relaxed a little. “Do you need a ride back?”

I guess I did. “Yeah.”

“Do you mind waiting till Dahlia wakes up?”

“I wouldn’t want to leave without saying goodbye to her.”

He went back to playing and I went back to our homework. I got another page done before there was a knock on the door. “Nicky, can I come in?”

He put the sheet music away and opened the door for her. He picked her up and set her on the bed. “We have to take Posey home now.”

She frowned. “We should just keep her.”

My lips turned up. “I think Nicky wants to have his house back, sweetheart.”

Dahlia shook her head. “He wants to keep you too, right?” She looked up at him.

Nickolas was silent and it answered every single question that I had. We were not friends. We were not more than friends. We were nothing. I was just a girl that his sister liked. That was the only thing that was keeping him civil with me now.

“We should go,” he told me, ignoring her question.

“Do I need shoes?”

“No.” He smiled.

“Can we all get ice cream?”

“No.”

“Please?”

He looked at me for help, so I gave it to him. Sort of. “I have to hurry to get home. Maybe he can take you after.” He seemed happy with that, making it clear that he just didn’t want more time with me.

We got in the car and Nickolas started driving. He was quiet as he let the music fill the silence. It was an eighties mix, the same one he was playing the last time we were all in the car. I waited for him to say something and it just didn’t happen.

When we stopped in front of the house, I didn’t want to get out of the car. I couldn’t pinpoint why, but my body made me hesitate when I was opening the door.

“Goodbye, Posey,” Dahlia said with tears. “I’ll miss you.”

I hurried out of the car and opened her door. I bent down to hug her. “I’ll miss you too, sweetheart. I love you.” I kissed her cheek and held back my own tears. She gave me those words for the first time, and I gave them right back for the first time.

Her little hands went around me. “You have to come see me and Nicky.”

I sighed. “I’ll see you soon.” I hoped it was the truth. I closed her door and went back to the passenger one.

I started unzipping the hoodie I was in so I could give it back to Nickolas. When I handed it to him, he didn’t take it. “It’s yours.”

“Why?”

He was quiet for too long. “Just keep it.”

I grabbed my backpack. “Thank you for this weekend. All of it.”

“You’re welcome,” he said, sounding cold.

I waved to Dahlia again and closed the door. The car was gone five seconds later. It made me feel a little lost. I just went inside the house and tried to find what I lost.