Chapter 111

“There is some good news to report,” Solaire could not even begin to recognise the man standing before him. His mind was in a daze, days after he’d last seen Mendora. All he could think was that tonight he’d publicly end the engagement.

“Speak it,” he could not raise his eyes from the glass of whisky he was twirling in his grip.

“While your club did initially take a hit with the ton’s slowing attendance, we’ve realised that our popularity has been reviving. Soon enough,” he inhaled excitedly,

“with the measures we’ve been putting in place to, there is little doubt that we can essentially run those swindlers out of business,” he was very pleased with himself.

“Disband it,” Solaire downed the drink, discarding the glass on the table. Pushing back on the chair and raising to his feet.

“What?” Trevor’s smile faltered. His entire face reflecting his confusion. They’d been working on plans and plans to get their club back on top and now that it was happening, he could not understand Solaire’s lack of interest. Especially when the news around town was that his fiancé had reappeared. The man should be happy and most of all refocused on his endeavours.

“Close it down by this week, I’ll reassign all the men to other projects.” He grabbed up his coat. He’d give her want she wanted. If it helped her feel better, then it was nothing to him.

“Have you misheard me, My Lord?” Trevor could not understand this lack of interest, “we can still be successful,”

“I heard you,” Solaire adjusted his jacket and exhaled. “Close it down. I won’t allow you or any of the men to suffer any losses so there take that from your mind,” Solaire responded. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have a party to plan.” He made way to speak to his housekeepers, ensuring that despite the sombre news that the guest could at least enjoy themselves.

***

“What is this about, dearest?” Lavinia walked into the parlour with her morning tea in hand to find Teresa, Finn and Tristan already seated. Mendora presiding over them, her eyes dark and sunken. Evidence that she’d not gotten much rest.

“I needed to speak to you,” she glanced around at everyone, “all of you.” She inhaled, “while we have all been invited to the Marquess’ party later tonight I must provide you with a heads up.” Her breath shuddered, but she must tell them so they might know how to compose themselves, after all the letter from Solaire had indicted his intentions for tonight’s soiree. “The Marquess and I will be announcing the end of our engagement,”

“He agreed?” Finn piped up, knowing what her plan was. To think that the Marquess had acquiesced was a shock in itself.

“It took some time but he now understands that it is the best decision for us both,” her mouth drying, her tongue heavy in her mouth.

“Dearest,” Lavinia did know what to say and could only muster giving her daughter a hug. It would be a talked about decision regardless and had long made up her mind to stand by her daughter.

“I am sorry to hear that, sister,” Tristan could not understand. Was the conversation he had with Finn fabricated? Finn had sworn up and down that the relationship he had with Mendora was innocent. Just friends, Finn had declared and that had led Tristan to think that Mendora would soon reconcile with the Marquess. It was clear there was some relationship between them, but for it to end so abruptly…Tristan found himself confused once more. “I’d thought you and the Marquess might have set aside any differences.”

“I am afraid they are irreconcilable,” Mendora swallowed hard. She’d had a lot of difficult decisions to make throughout her life and she could not understand how parting ways with Solaire easily ranked in the top three.

“You are making a mistake,” Teresa blurted out, drawing attention to herself. She’d learnt the hard way to trust Mendora’s instincts. Her sister had never led her astray but this was one decision she knew to be a terrible one.

“Teresa,” Lavinia interjected, shaking her head, “This is Mendora’s decision. Her happiness is at stake and we should offer our support as a family.”

“Thank you, mama,” Mendora turned to acknowledge Teresa, “In an ideal world all of us can attain some happiness or fulfilment through marriage and having a trusting partner. I have to accept that path is not for me. I’ve tired and I always come up short.” She explained to her sister but Teresa was not having it. Folding her arms at her chest, she leaned into the couch, aware that all eyes were on her. “I had lost focus on the things I was passionate about and now I realise that I should revisit those things and be a contributing member to society now that I do have some inheritance. I can put that money to good use,”

“I think that one stupid argument has caused you to be terrified to the point that you are blind to a man who is in love with you and I know for a fact that you love him,”

“I am not blind,” Mendora’s temper was baring its head. “And it was not a stupid argument.”

“All those goals you speak of do you not know what he’d done to honour you while you’d disappeared without a word. And it comes even after he found out you were hiding from her.” Teresa leaned forward. Her mother had sworn her to secrecy. To not let any external matters cloud Mendora’s judgement, but she knew her sister and from the conversations they had, Mendora did not trust Solaire’s feelings for her.

“What are you saying?” Mendora stilled, never before seeing this side of her sister. Not sure how to feel for her advocating for Solaire.

“Your project he promised to fund for the orphans in the work houses had come full circle in your absence. He achieved his approvals and has been able to oversee dozens of children being moved from those deplorable conditions. He did it because he knew you were passionate about it. Hell, who in the ton also doesn’t know that he’d reconciled his relationship with his own mother as an indirect result of your engagement. Not to mention his efforts to search for you tirelessly to no avail. Having taken every letter, you sent home to us to analyse it for some clue on where you were.” Teresa watched as Mendora’s breathing elevated, signalled by the visible rising and falling of her chest. All of this was new information to her sister and Teresa knew it.

“And countless more,” her voice lowered, not sure her sister could take it but she needed to expose one final thing, “he even got full retribution from Sir Henry. The Marquess had exposed the man for his doings and he has fled England from the shame.”

“He searched for me?” Everything else was monumental indeed but the one thing that had been plaguing her mind for months was the fact that Solaire never seemed to care enough to miss her absence. That had been floating in her head, making her lose sleep and sanity.

“The night you disappeared he wanted to converse with you but we convinced him otherwise and when he found that you’d gone he went to our cousins to visit you but soon realised we fabricated the story of you being there. He was livid and more worried for your safety than anyone else.” Teresa explained, “I know something hurt you and I will never minimalize your feelings, but I do think that it’s something that can be worked past.” Teresa rose to her feet, touching Mendora on the shoulder before exiting the room.

“Dearest,” Lavinia intervened. “If you do not love him and cannot see yourself being happy with him then no amount of good will on his part can make you feel something you don’t” She advised, “it is your decision.” She gave her a kiss on the cheek, ready to also vacate the room, she called after the two men. Desperate to give Mendora some time to think.

Tristan obeyed, coming off from his seat immediately and following Lavinia. He’d come to respect her more than he thought in the time he knew her. Finn on the other had was slower to leave.

“What do you want?” he came up beside her, tipping her chin up so that she was looking at him.

“I thought I knew,” apart from her sister’s words, Lavinia’s final monologue had her thinking. She couldn’t even say the reason she wanted out was because she no longer loved him. She did. Desperately and painfully. But she’d failed to believe he could love her and now, with everything she knew, Mendora wondered if she was wrong.

“Teresa is right,” he looked at her with a sadness Mendora had never seen before, “I think you are running away.” He saw the tears pooling in her eyes and knew he was right, “You love him, Mendora and trust me when I say not everyone is fortunate enough to find love. Or have it reciprocated.” And Finn knew, in his very bones that the Marquess was in love with her. He knew because he too felt for her and he saw that look reflected in the Marquess’ eyes and actions.

***

Solaire was hauled up in his study, leaning back against his desk as she gazed out the window. His back to the door as he poured the last bit of whiskey from the bottle into his glass.

One drink had turned into five and after this last one, he’d have no further excuse to delay his appearance at his own party. No other excuse to delay what was to come.

“My Lord, we’ve packed the carriage and it is ready for your departure,” Williams peeked into the study to advise him and quickly disappeared.

“Departure?” the sound of her voice so unexpected that Solaire took a glance back to note that Mendora was now standing before the shut door. “Are you going somewhere?” she was staring at him expectantly, eyes wide and calm. No evidence of the hate he’d seen a few nights ago.

“I’ve planned everything,” he took one glance at her and averted his gaze. Not at all questioning why she’d snuck into his study while all the guest was already arriving.

“I won’t mock up our announcement if that’s why you are here,” he drawled, taking another sip of his whiskey. He forced himself not to look at her because he knew it would only deepen the agony twisting in his chest. A large part of him was ready to grab her up and beg for another chance, but he could not force her into a life she didn’t want.

“Where are you going, Solaire?” Her voice was more insistent. Not at all interested in his plans for tonight’s announcement.

“France,” he swallowed the remainder of his drink and set the glass down. Finally leaning off the desk and walking around it. He gazed at her then.

Fuck, she was radiant and it took every bit of self-control he possessed not to pull her into his arms. “Figured it was time for a new scenery.” He shrugged, “shall we?” he motioned for the door.

“You’re leaving?” she ignored his offer to leave. “Why? For how long?” she could not think of never seeing him or crossing paths with him. “Everyone you care about is here.” Her heart was hammering.

“What does it matter to you? Hmm?” he stepped closer, his eyes dark. “I am doing this for you,” his voice lowered and he exhaled. “The sooner I am gone, the sooner any gossip that erupts will fade away. You can have a fresh start.” He advised her and it was then she noted his sunken eyes and stubble. He’d not been caring for himself these past days and it showed.

“I do not want one,” she swallowed hard. Mendora had not known exactly how she was supposed to approach this topic but time was of the essence, especially since he was ready to leave the country. It was time she stopped running. Her sister was right. She had been so used to forgiving and being submissive that when she finally set boundaries for herself. Finally promised herself that she’d not allow herself to suffer any disrespect, she ran at the sight of the slightest inconvenience. There was no balance and because of it she ran, because it was easier than dealing with difficult emotions and trauma.

“What do you mean?” he wanted to be angry at her, to show not one ounce of care but it was impossible. Even in this moment, one characterising the end of their relationship, he valued the time he had in her presence.

“I do not want you to leave,” she looked down at her shoes, “at least not without me.” Her fingers were trembling and she laced them together for support. Solaire was speechless, unaware of what exactly was happening. “You were right the other night when you said everything I did since I came back was to capture your attention and you were right that I was doing it because I love you.”

He parted his lips to speak, but she silenced him with a raise of her hand, “I was selfish in disregarding your confession to me and treating it as if it didn’t matter.” She took his hands in hers, “because it did. I waited so long, dreamed so hard to hear those words echoed in your voice. I was prideful, spiteful and hateful and it almost made me give up the one thing I absolutely want and that is a life with you.” Her lips were quivering as she said the words, as she realised the gravity of what she would have allowed to happen. Tears dripping down her cheeks as she stared at him. “I am sorry, Solaire, and I—”

“Shh,” he pulled her into his arms, her emotions getting the better of her. Stroking her hair and feeling immensely less weighted he spoke, “All was forgiven and forgotten from the moment you confessed your true feelings,” the words whispered against her hair. “I hurt you, don’t apologise for how you chose to deal with it. I am sorry I wasn’t able to reassure you of my feelings sooner.” He held no grudge or hate. He loved her and knowing she felt the same was enough.

“So you’re not leaving?” her voice was muffled, her arms tightly wrapped around him.

“No, little one.” He calmed her, “There is the issue of our party though,” he moved so he could look at her. Eyes soaked with tears, he wiped them away with his thumbs. “Should we announce a wedding date instead of a dissolution?” he offered, pressing his forehead against hers.

Mendora gave a half smile and nodded, “I’d like that.”

“Me too,” he pressed a kiss to her forehead, leaning lower to claim her lips with the knowledge that she was finally his.

THE END.

PS: An epilogue is in the works. Let me know what ya'll would like to see happen to our couples <3