As I got up the stairs, I heard muffled voices coming from the master bedroom. My informant had told me of my parents' absence so what voices was I hearing from their bedroom? Tiptoeing to the door, I slipped my hand around the doorknob ready to push it open and fly inside but something stopped me.
It was the voices, they grew louder and I could hear something hitting the ground. Their room had a noise cancellation effect on the door and walls but there'd been a way I could hear them argue about my behavior as a child at night when they thought I was sleeping.
They'd put the effect when as a child, I used to be frightened of their consistent loud argument during the night. In front of the media, everyone thought they were the ideal couple but that was only a facade.
My stepmother was always manipulating her decisions into becoming binding ones for the company and my dad always felt she was indirectly calling him incompetent. Dad had insecurity issues and my stepmother's witchery didn't help him gain any more confidence in himself than he'd gained before he married her. It'd puzzled me as to why Dad had chosen such a hot-headed woman when he obviously hated her guts.
I guess love made people do silly things.
Calmly, I felt the wall for the spot I'd usually put my ear as a kid to get their words out. I'd heard lots of details about the company, her demeaning attitude towards my dad and cruelty towards the staff and other low-income earners. She felt they deserved punishment for being lazy and reckless and she was the chosen one to mete out such punishments. Listening in had been a usual habit until I found books and completely forgot about the pleasure of getting details of everyone's lives.
Books took me into worlds I wanted to be in and then David came along but right now, I was re-enacting an old habit. Soon, I found the spot and coiled into my usual posture, edging my ear into the spot. Memories hit me like a ton of bricks but I steadied my breathing and began making out the words.
“You can't keep doing this, Alicia.” Dad pleaded, his tone brittle and I sighed deeply as pity seeped into my heart for him. He was really doing a stressful job, putting up with his overbearing wife and managing a large empire that had been passed down generations and which he didn't want to end with him. Poor, poor dad.
“Keep doing what?” My stepmother responded offhandedly and made a “tai” sound from the gum she was chewing noisily.
“I made a mistake! It had happened fucking 6 years ago! I can't even believe you still threaten me with it?” His tone held a mixture of disbelief and exasperation. He must have begged very many times. Tormentous witch!
“To me, it did yesterday and I can make it so. You have to keep compiling until I get enough respite for the sin you committed against me by bringing that girl into our lives. Our happy home, Derek!” Her tone gladiated between flat to aggressive and I could imagine her rage-twisted face.
“How long? How long will you torture me? Don't you love me anymore? Why do you like seeing me suffer?” Dad pleaded, sounding even weaker.
“Because I suffered! I was the woman whose husband couldn't keep his little penis in check. Who had to accept and raise a child born out of her husband's affair with another woman. You broke me, Derek, and I'll never forgive you.” She spoke venomously amidst panting and I struggled with my feeble heart not to feel her pain.
“Every day that child grew under my care, a part of me died to you and your touches and your smiles.” She continued. “What made it even much more painful was seeing her blossom beautifully in comparison to Audrey and watching you love her. I had to do something.” She stopped there and I could tell it was something known to them both.
I walked away from the wall, feeling every part of my body. Did she do anything to me? I worried anxiously until I heard muffled voices again and I got back in position. Curiosity quenched my despair.
“You'll disown her publicly like she did to Audrey.” She stated, apathetically and I knew she'd crossed her legs. I've seen her do that every time she took an unpleasant decision on behalf of someone. “Erase her from this history or else everyone in Rubenn and beyond will read about your fraudulent actions at the City Bank. I can change the date anytime and don't even try to do anything stupid or I end her life with yours.”
“The company is yours too. Your actions will bring it down too.” Dad rushed to say, trying to reason with her.
“Get smarter, Derek. I have myself and Audrey covered for life. You'll suffer the loss alone and I'll walk out of your life with everyone thinking I got tired of the drama.” I heard a clicking sound on the door and I darted away.
Seconds flew by and I found myself out on the streets, wandering. My shoes were off my feet and I just kept walking on. Memories rolled through my head and I was lost in another world, one more interesting than the one I had here. It didn't have a shitty stepmother or a blackmailed dad neither was there a cheating step-sister and mother fucker for a boyfriend.
It was peaceful. I was a girl again with blonde hair and bright eyes, I was inquisitive and touche, I was spoilt and indulged and most of it all, I was happy and 7. I didn't want to stop running through the garden with Audrey chasing me, I didn't want to stop chattering endlessly about my day in school at the dining table, I didn't want any of it to end.
But it did and that's when I turned 8 and stepmom burned all my dolls and Barbie houses. That's when Dad insisted I eat the vegetables and practice table manners. That's when Audrey was allowed to hit me, that's when I was locked in my bathroom in isolation for 4 days because I broke stepmom's vase. That's when…
That's when…
I had stopped walking I was on the sidewalk under the heavy downpour both from the sky and from my eyes. My body jerked and my eyes flew open as a hand tugged at my wrist. It was Damien and his warm palm around my wrist made me realize that I was freezing.
Without struggle, I got into the car. The tiredness on the driver's face could tell they'd been honking for a while. Damien didn't ask any questions or raised his voice as I settled into the seat close to him instead he offered to help me into the sweatshirt he was putting on.
That was when I noticed he wasn't in official clothes. Had he been out here looking for me? How had he found me anyway? I didn't know anywhere here. I let him pull off my drenched shirt and help me into his sweatshirt, obeying like a little girl and sniffling endlessly. He stretched a napkin towards me and as I reached for it, I realized I wasn't with my shoes anymore.
“My shoes.” I croaked, my lips trembling in cold. He nodded towards a wet heap close to his feet and I managed a smile.
“You'll be fine.” He assured me as he inched closer to try to get me warmer because I was still freezing.
My heart leaped. I was that little girl again.