Chapter 203
Chapter 203
James:
“It was just as you described.” I said quietly.
“What was?” She blinked, then turned to me.
“The Moon Goddess.”
“You saw her?” Her eyes widened in surprise and for a second I’m reminded of Mattie’s surprised look this morning.
“During the ceremony, when the witch split my hand open, the goddess appeared.” The memory gripped my chest and I took a steadying breath. I’ve told no-one, not even Travis, what fully happened before they burst through that door. It felt like if I said it out loud then it would be real. Saying it now felt like dragging a blade across something barely healed. After seven months, I finally felt like I could accept it. It was shitty I didn’t have my wolf, but I was still alive right? After my encounter with Mattie I really felt like there was a reason for everything. I knew her name now and that small bit of hope I thought I lost returned.
“I think she saved my life.” I admitted.
Rue let out a breath, slow and quiet, on the tail end of a chuckle, “It’s hard to tell with her, isn’t it?”
Her eyes flicked to the commotion on the porch. A sweet smile graced her lips when Reece cheered about something.
“She called em her favorite.” I pushed, :Then flipped the blood curse somehow.”
Rue turned toward me, eyes locking in. she’s listening now, really listening to only me. I licked my dry lips before I continued, “I don’t understand everything she did but I think taking Beau away was her way of protecting me. Or saving me somehow.”
“The Moon Goddess does what she thinks is best.” Rue rocked the hammock into motion again. “We don’t always understand her line of thinking or her decisions.”
I glanced back up at the deck. Reese is waving his hands animatedly as he talks. Travis laughed that low, proud dad-laugh while he gives his son all his attention. The previous conversation I had with Reece creeped back into my mind.
“Speaking of what is best,” I started, careful with my words, “I think you should send Reece to the West Coast for his alpha training.”
Rue planted her heels into the ground, stopping the hammock instantly.
“He hasn’t shifted yet but will soon.” I nudged her elbow. Her head turned with that same fire I’ve known since we were kids.
Her sharp scowl stabbed right through me, “So you’re the one who planted that idea into my son’s head.”
I shrugged, moving my arms down in case she tried to break my nose again. “I just said it was an option.”
“The west coast is too far away.” She snapped, “What if he needs help?”
“Then I’ll be there, like I’ve always been there for you two.” I said and something flashes in her eyes. It looked raw and bitter and I didn’t like what I saw. I tried to backtrack but Rue looked away with venom in her expression.
“No. He needs to be close to his home.” She firmly stated. Rue stood and the hammock folds in on me like it’s agreeing with her. But what do they know? In alpha tradition, all heirs are sent away to train to be stronger. Reece would be weak if he stayed and Rue continued to baby him. If she couldn’t understand, Travis would.
“What does Travis think?” I tilt my head, my tone sharpened. “You’re his Luna, babes. Travis has final say of his pack.” I narrowed my eyes to drive in my point, “That includes decisions about his heir.”
“It doesn’t matter what he thinks! My son needs to stay near me!” Rue nearly shouted. Her whole body tensed and I braced for a punch. I hear the clatter of the patio chair signaling Travis stood up. I had to get Rue to understand before my cousin got the wrong idea and kicked my ass.
“He’s Reece’s father.” I said, trying to sound calm, “Travis gets final say in what his heir does.”
When she doesn’t respond and just stared at me with ice, I sighed, “I’ll talk to Travis about the opportunity and he can set you straight.”
“Set me straight?” Rue glared at me, “You know, every time I think that you’re making progress towards being a somewhat decent human being you say something so fucking stupid.”
“That’s the problem though,” I smirked with self-pity, bitterness curing in my gut. “I’m not human.”
“With or without your wolf you sound exactly like your father when you say shit like that.” Rue snapped. Then she stormed off. When her bare feet hit the bottom of the stairs that lead to the deck she shouts out, “Limped noodled asshole!”
“Swear jar!” Reece yelled. Travis gave me a hard look before he moved to intercept Rue. The words hung in the air like smoke, curling in my lungs and making my throat tighten. I laid frozen in the hammock. I’m not like him. I was nothing like my father. I wasn’t weak. But the words hit too deep, and the part of me that still bleed from childhood feels too open now. No matter what she said out of anger I couldn’t be like that man. I wouldn’t be like him. I forced myself out of the hammock and make a straight line for my car. As her words repeated I gulped down the emotions that clogged my throat and stung my eyes. I wouldn’t stay here tonight. I needed distance and distractions because Rue’s words hit harder than her punches do. I needed to not feel like this. First bar, club or sketchy dive I see would be it. It would be my church, salvation, and therapy all in one. It didn’t matter. I’ll drown this conversation in noise, whiskey or maybe some pussy that doesn’t make me feel this way. I’m not weak. I’m not a sadistic elitist asshole that tortures and manipulates everyone around him. I wasn’t anything like any of them.