52-1

There's something grounding about the ocean. As I wake up, limbs so laden with sleep that I feel like I've sunken into the bed, I can hear the soft lull of waves outside, and it's so soothing. Knowing that the land ends, opening up into this vast body of unknown waters that, when you try to look as far as you can, only leads into oblivion. Despite always being logical—wanting to know how things work and seeing the end of a problem—being faced with something like the ocean gives me a sense of peace I can't put my finger on. Finally, I will my eyes to stop looking up at the wood-planked ceiling and to turn my gaze to the side. Our night was uneventful yesterday, we were tired from travelling and hit the sack fairly early. Jaewook insisted on pushing all three mattresses together to fill up the small upstairs sleeping quarters. At first, he just laid on his back, thinking as he has been a lot lately. I was hesitant to touch him, so I turned to the side and closed my eyes. At one point of the night though, I felt his warmth fit against my back, his arms wrapped around my body and I immediately felt calm, like I had let out a breath I had been holding the whole time. But as I wake up, I notice he isn't laying down. When I lift my head I see him sitting on the edge of the middle mattress, a notebook on his lap and a pencil in hand. The light from the big windows facing the beds pours in through gaps in the blinds. It lights up a streak of his head, making his dark hair look more chestnut than anything. It also dances over his forearm as it moves, carrying his hand along the page. He's drawing something. "Jaewook," I simply say. He turns his head immediately, eyes holding that familiar wide, doe shape. "Noona, you're awake. C—" He shifts on the mattress now, looking at the window. "Can I open the curtains? The sun is rising." I nod and he stands to draw the curtains. He also cranks open the big window, which allows for that soothing sound of waves to hit my eardrums more clean and crisp. He sits back down, looking out at the peach coloured ocean as the rising sun washes it with watercolours. He begins to draw again. "What do you want to do today?" I lay on my side and hold my face up with a hand. "I don't know." Well first, we need to eat. "We should go to a market to buy some food." "Sure," he mutters while still focused on his sketch. Not content with just watching him anymore, I push the thin sheet off of me and crawl over to him. On my knees, I peek over his shoulder to see what I was expecting, a sketch of the ocean and sun. Despite being all done in pencil, the shading allows for the imagination to pick up on all the different colours. I run my hands down his arms and kiss the side of his neck. "That looks amazing," I compliment. He grimaces in embarrassment, not knowing how to accept the honest remark. "Thanks," he merely says. I sit beside him and lean my head on his shoulder, just wanting to be close in any way. I close my eyes and listen to the water dance outside, feeling the soft sun touch my skin. "I love you," I simply say to him. He stops moving his hand and turns his head slightly to look down at me. "Destiny, I love you too. A lot." My eyes open, my head turning up to see the sincerity on his face. After the weird behaviour he has been showing the past while, hearing this sets something off inside me. I have to look down quickly before he catches any tears form in my eyes. I scold myself under my breath. "Noona? What's wrong." His hand drops his pencil onto the bed to hold onto my jaw, lifting it up. "Nothing, my period must be coming or something, it's nothing." I brush it off, eternally embarrassed to uncharacteristically start crying like this. I try to take my jaw away but his grip hardens. His eyes bore into both of mine. "I don't say it enough. That's why. I'm sorry. I love you, I love you, I love you." "Shit," I whisper when more tears suddenly burst from his words because it's true, I feel like I'm always telling him how I feel, but not as often do I hear the same in return, especially lately. "I'm sorry," he whispers, his breath minty as it hits my lips. He must have been awake for quite a while. I sniffle against my will and wipe away the few tears in annoyance. His hands move to hold my cheeks, his nose touching mine as he repeats the words again. "I'm sorry I don't say it enough. But I feel it, always." "Dammit Jaewook, just shut up! You're making me—" I can't help but laugh as I yell at him, tears just leaving my ducts everytime he speaks. He smiles at me, that smile I feel like I haven't seen in forever. He quickly kisses me once. Then twice. "Come on, let's go explore." A smile effortlessly forms on my lips as I nod. . . . We walk to a small market. While the walk was a bit of a hike, over many hills, it was still enjoyable to be immersed in a world so different from home; no fast-paced lives. We buy whatever food we think will last us for our short trip and haul it back. After we make a quick meal, we head out the back doors, eager to get closer to the blue water surrounding us. Jaewook lights up as soon as our feet touch the sand. He throws his shirt off hastily, smile wide as he starts running towards the waves. I myself make sure to grab his flying shirt and put it in a neat pile with my own clothes on a large rock. The sand feels like it's burning my feet, making every time I lift one foot off of it feel like short bliss. Eventually I have to lift them up quicker, eventually jogging to the cool freedom of the water. "Ouch," I hiss before the water drags across the wet sand to cover my feet. "Ahh," I sigh in bliss. Jaewook, already fully submerged in the water, squints his eyes at me, gesturing for me to go into the water. But now, as I take step by step, I'm alarmed by how cold it is. If it's not one it's the other. "Noona," he calls out, seemingly impatient. "I'm taking my time," I wave my hand at him, dismissing him. But he stands up and heads over to me at great speed. Before I can comprehend what's going to happen, he's grabbed me and flung me over his shoulder. "Get me off! You rascal, what are you doing!" I hit his back with my fists but he just laughs. He drops me down into bridal position and I immediately lift my legs up from the water. "It's too cold! I need to ease into it!" "That's not how it works, you need to just jump right in."