Thirty One

**Joel's POV**

I felt the warmth against my hand before I opened my eyes. My lashes fluttered, the condensation from the oxygen mask making them damp. I braced for a bright light, but it was dark, the only light coming from a partially obscured drip machine and heart monitor.

My fingers twitched beneath the warmth, and it stirred, the shadow moving before me.

"Joel?" Her sweet soft voice called to me, and I smiled. "Isaac, he's awake." I heard a noise from my right, where I knew Isaac had been perched for an unknown amount of time.

"Good morning, sleeping beauty." My best friend teased, his voice thick with sleep. But my eyes were too busy searching the figure before me to look that way.

"It's happening again." I mumbled, but he laughed.

"Nah, man. She's really here this time." What? I furrowed my brow, moving to sit up and wincing at the discomfort. I felt so damn heavy.

"Hey, don't push yourself." She clicked on the light above the hospital bed, illuminating the small space.

"Jen?" She was here. God, she was really here. My trembling hand flipped over, taking her fingers in mine. It really was her hand.

She let out a small giggle, her eyes pricking with tears.

"Hey."

"What-" I had so many questions, not sure where to begin. I wanted to ask her when she got here. Why she came in the first place. Why she was still smiling at me. "What time is it?"

She pulled out her phone, illuminating the black screen.

"Six am. Wednesday."

"Shit. It's been six days?" My eyes shot to Isaac, who was wearing the same clothes from the bar. He nodded tiredly, resting his head back against the headrest.

"How do you feel?" Jen asked, her thumb tracing mine.

"Confused." Fuck, my classes. I had missed two days. I looked at the beautiful woman who was still in control of my life. "Do I still have a job?" She cocked her head.

"They won't fire you for having a heart attack. I don't think that's legal." But I stared at her.

"I wasn't talking about that." It took her a second to understand what I was saying, and she furrowed her beautiful brow.

"Did you think I'd take your job from you?" She didn't sound angry or indignant, but hurt. No. I didn't want to hurt her. Not anymore.

"I need to talk to you about what happened." My voice sounded much weaker than I had intended, but that was what begging did to a person. I was desperate. She was here. I never wanted her to go.

"We don't need to do that now. I don't think that would help your condition." She argued, but in a soft tone. Okay. I could wait. Hell, I'd wait however long she wanted me to as long as she stayed beside me.

"Okay." Her eyes widened, taking me in with surprise clouding her face. "What?"

"I didn't expect you to agree so easily. Are you sure you didn't bump your head?" She giggled, the sound bringing a bright smile to my face.

"No. I can wait for you." I lifted her hand, so I could memorize the look of them together. "But there is one thing I have to say."

"Okay." She shifted anxiously in her seat, focusing her big brown eyes on me. God, I wanted to kiss her.

But I settled for lacing her small fingers in mine.

"I love you, Jennifer. I love you and I'm sorry. I'm so sorry for hurting you. I was selfish, and downright insane. There's no excuse for it. But I wanted you to know that I'm not going to hide how I feel anymore. To anyone."

Her hand tensed, and I felt it in my chest.

"But, Joel, your job-"

"Isn't as important." I could see her tears surfacing with her blinks, but I couldn't tell if she was happy or upset.

"Joel-"

Knock, knock.

"Mister Becker, how are you feeling this morning?" Damn it. Why didn't these doctors ever wait to be invited in? I bit back my disappointment at the interruption, turning to the door. There was an older man in a white coat, followed by three resident physicians.

"Better." I answered simply.

"Good. Is it okay if we talk about your healthcare in front of…" He eyed Jen, waiting for her statement of relation to me. I flinched, waiting for the word, 'student.'

"Girlfriend. I'm his girlfriend. Jen." What? My eyes shot to her, but she stared straight ahead with a kind smile.

"Lovely to meet you. Dr. Hutchinson. So can she stay?" I nodded, still too shocked to speak. Did she say girlfriend? Was she just saying that? I wanted to ask her what she meant by that. Damn it. I needed her alone. "Alright, great. Well, we've seen great improvement in your EKG results over the past few days. You are responding excellently to treatment. All this to say, I don't see any reason for us to keep you. I think it'd be a good idea to move you home. How does that sound?"

"Great." I replied honestly, missing the comfort of my own bed and decent food.

"Good. Will you be handling his at home care?" He directed to Jen.

"Uh-"

"Yes." My mouth clamped shut at her declaration. She looked damn determined, the sight sending a shiver down my spine. Did she realize what she just agreed to? Was she really planning on taking care of me?

"Good. I'll send his prescriptions in to his pharmacy upon discharge. The important thing is rest. He needs at least two solid weeks of avoiding strenuous activity, counting this week. That includes sexual intercourse." He raised a brow, and her cheeks flushed red. "We can schedule him to return at the end of next week for a stress test. If he clears it, he can go back to work. But not a day sooner. We'll also schedule a follow up appointment with a cardiologist for long term monitoring. Sound good?" He raised his thumb in question.

"Yea. I think I got it." She said with a nod. He opened his notebook, taking out a small stack of stapled papers and handing it to Jen. I knew I was on alot of heavy drugs, but it felt weird for him to address her instead of me.

"These are some of the more detailed post care instructions. Things to avoid and whatnot. You know, rules." He grinned, and she offered him a courtesy laugh.

"Okay. Thank you. I think I could get him to behave for a week." She joked, squeezing the hand she still had hold of. I would behave for her every damn day if she would be taking care of me. Fuck. The image of Jen in a slutty nurse outfit took over my mind. Okay, maybe it would be harder than I originally thought. I shifted, mentally cursing my cock into submission. I was not about to get horny in front of a doctor and three medical students.

"Good. I'll have the discharge paperwork drafted up for you, then you can be on your way." He nodded, and they all scurried out as fast as they entered. My eyes landed on Isaac, who was now unconscious in the chair. We could wait to wake him until they came back.

"Joel."

"Yes, baby?" I flinched. Oops. It slipped out. She pulled in her bottom lip, chewing on it while her eyes searched mine. Whatever she was looking for, I hoped she found it. Seemingly satisfied, she took a deep breath and spoke.

"When I left, I said that I didn't want you anymore." My stomach twisted, my gaze falling to the bed. Yea, I remembered it well. It had been playing in my head on repeat since she said it. "But," Wait. But? "I've done a lot of thinking over the past few days and… And I want to try again, but things have to change."

"I completely agree." I rushed out, removing the damn mask from my face and licking my dry lips. "Jen, I don't want to fight anymore. Things got way out of hand. That's not who I am, and I want to prove it. I want to show you how much I love you. Only you." Her breath caught, her tears spilling over. I loved how emotional she was. She always wore her heart on her sleeve. It was beautiful.

"No more shouting."

"No, baby."

"No more secrets."

"Not a single one. I need you, Jennifer. I wasn't lying. I'm not going to lose you again." She leaned forward, her trembling hands cupping my face.

"I love you. God, I love you." Hearing those words from her mouth tugged at my heart, and I lunged forward to catch her lips. She responded immediately, melting against my every movement.

This was exactly what I needed. Suddenly, nobody else mattered but her and me. She was my whole world and I loved her. My fingers brushed into her hair, and I wanted to deepen it, but the damn machine started blaring with my spiked pulse, pulling us out of our reunion with quiet laughter.

"We can continue this when we get home?" I smiled against her lips, but she tsked.

"No, sir. Strict bed rest for you. We can't have this." I hissed as her hand cupped my erection from atop the sheets.

"Yes, nurse." I teased.

"Good boy." She winked, pulling away and standing with a stretch. She had no clue what a damn temptress she was. She was so fucking sexy, even in her athletic shorts and t-shirt. She didn't have to try. No make up or fancy clothes required.

She crossed to wake Isaac, and they started talking about how they were going to get my car back to my house from the bar.

There was still so much to talk about, so much to decide, but I knew we'd get through it. I'd do anything for this woman.

Within a couple hours, we were back at my house. She had gone home to pick up some clothes for the week. It felt weird at first, having her back. Not like I deserved it. I knew I didn't.

Still, I knew we had to talk about Callie. She finally agreed to do it after supper, so I ordered us a pizza and made sure to include Dr. Pepper for her to ease her nerves. I was still a mess, but she deserved an explanation.

I told her everything. Not just about the kiss, but about our entire relationship. About the ring. About the promise I made to be better. It seemed stupid now. That I would carry a ring as a reminder of my failure, then proceed to fail all over again. But I couldn't change the past. I couldn't take it back.

I surrendered my ring to Jen that day, deciding that she would be my motivation to be better instead. I had no idea what she did with it, but honestly, I didn't give a fuck. She could have it incinerated for all I cared.

After a pizza, and half a box of tissues, she somehow forgave me. I was amazed. Absolutely floored by her grace, and I knew that I wouldn't forsake her ever again.

I was done with Callie for good.

At least, I thought I was.