Chapter 82 I've been in love with you for seven years
NOVA
I stayed up late speaking with Brion. It had been days since I last saw him, so he wanted to fill the void created during my absence. He was like a clingy kid who refused to let go. I held a glass of wine in hand as we watched the stars. It was a clear night, with beautiful stars glittering in the moonless sky. The soft breeze blowing from our garden gave the night a fragrant smell. I could even taste the smell of the flowers in the air. Sitting on the double swings and observing the sky, with glasses in our hands, gave me the most wholesome feeling ever.
"This has always been my dream," Brion muttered beside me, swinging slowly. "If only I could pause the moment and live in it forever."
I stopped scanning the sky and turned to glance at him, to see his expression. It was one of contentment. He looked as if he had gotten everything he ever wanted, and more.
He took a sip of his wine and turned to look at me. His beautiful green eyes sparkled, telling stories his lips couldn't.
"What are you talking about? Swinging at night?" I teased, loving the way his lips thinned into a frown. He didn't respond immediately. Instead, he took another sip of the drink and rocked on the swing.
"Brion?"
"You." His reply was a whisper, one I wouldn't have caught if I wasn't close to him.
Puzzled, I squinted at him, wondering what he was talking about. "What do you mean by that? Don't tell me your dream is to swing at night with me while sipping wine. You could have told me about it long ago. You know I would have done everything to fulfill it."
"Not just that." He returned his gaze to mine. "I have always wished to swing at night while gazing at the sky with someone I love."
My breath hitched in my throat at his words. Gulping, I looked up at him, not knowing how to react to his words. Hearing him say those words with a straight face struck a cord within me. I gulped the entire content in one go and placed the glass on the grass next to me, suddenly feeling self-conscious. I couldn't even tell how to act at the moment.
"Nova?"
I snapped my gaze up at him, only to lower it at the intensity of his stare. He looked like he might melt me with that look.
"I don't -"
"I'm not asking for you to reciprocate my feelings. I just need to let it all out," he breathed, returning his gaze to the star. "I just needed to let you know I love you. More than you can ever think possible."
Gulping, I watched him, not knowing what to say. A month ago, I would have jumped at his words, but at the moment, I couldn't. I felt it wasn't fair to him. I still had sufficient baggage and didn't wish to burden him with anything. Now that I was entangled with my ex while seeking my revenge, I couldn't afford to be with him.
Brion doesn't deserve this. He deserves someone better than me. Not someone with enough baggage to weigh him down. He deserves to be loved by someone, but I don't know if I could be that person. Though I wanted to be selfish about this. Having Brion's love would mean so many things to me, but I couldn't.
"Nova?"
I blinked at the call, realizing I had spaced out while speaking with him.
"I'm sorry. I was just lost in thoughts," I said, trying not to make it sound like I wasn't listening to him when I was. The last thing I needed was for him to think I ignored him when I did nothing of that
sort.
"It's okay." He downed the entire content of his wine and placed it on the grass like I did. "I just wanted to let it out of my chest. It has been weighing me down for a long time," he explained, smiling. His eyes didn't seem to share his mind. They seemed sad.
"How long have you been in love with me?" I asked before I could stop myself.
"Seven years."
"What??" I gasped in shock. "You must be joking. We only met five years ago. Have you forgotten how to do basic maths?"
We haven't been together for that long. Though it has been almost six years since I met him, I doubt it was up to seven.
"No, I haven't." Puffing out a breath, he turned to look at me, letting me see the sincerity in his gaze. "I have loved you since the first time I laid my eyes on you. That was way before you got married to Dashiell. I was mustering my courage to walk up to you and tell you how I felt about you, only to hear from the person you worked with that someone has snagged you up."
To say it shocked me would be the greatest overstatement of our time. I could only gape at him, wondering if he was pulling my legs or telling the truth. I couldn't recall meeting someone like him. I would have remembered if I did. Brion didn't have a common face. He was a damned handsome man. There was no way I wouldn't have recalled encountering him.
"Are you certain I was the one?" I asked, to know if he had his facts straight, to avoid any misunderstanding. It could be he was talking about another person.
He nodded with a smile, sighing as he fixed his gaze on the sky. "We didn't meet. I was the one who saw you. I was in love at first sight."
Hearing the raw emotions in his tone and seeing his expression, made me realize he was telling the truth. After all these years with him, I figured our first meeting was at the hospital. Though he told me he fell in love with my jewellery, he never spoke about how we met. I guessed it was either he saw a picture of mine or my designs.
"I didn't know," I whispered, mentally slapping myself at how tiny my tone was, wondering what was wrong with me. Instead of saying something meaningful, I ended up saying such an embarrassing
thing.
"Look, I'm not trying to force you to love me." This time, when he returned his gaze to me, he turned so he could fully see my face. "I just need you to know how much I feel, to know someone is willing
to go an extra length just to be with you." He took my hand in his and placed a kiss on the back. "I will always be here with you, darling. I will always have your back. I don't care about anyone else, but
you.