151. Kissed him

151. Kissed him
ALLISON.

"She must have taken it while he was asleep. And Mason… the reckless bastard… he let it happen."
I saw the rage flicker in his eyes, but beneath it, there was something else. Pain.
"Mason promised he’d retrieve it again. But that didn’t change the fact that every second counted. Noelle was dying."
A lump formed in my throat.
"A week passed. He still hadn’t gotten it back. And by then… Noelle was already taking her last breath.” River’s voice became almost hollow.
Silence stretched between us. I watched him, my heart breaking at the way his expression, as if he was trying to keep himself together.
"I held her as she died, Allison. I watched the light fade from her eyes." His voice was barely above a whisper now.
My heart hurt for him. No one deserved to lose their mate that way.
"And then, hours later, Mason showed up. With the fragment. But it was too late. She was gone"
River let out a bitter laugh, but there was no humor in it. "I tried to use it on her anyway. But it didn’t work. The Dragon’s Heart Fragment couldn’t bring back the dead."
I closed my eyes briefly, trying to imagine how that must have felt. The helplessness. The devastation.
"I hated him after that. Hated how careless he was. How he let a fucking vampire walk away with the only thing that could’ve saved her. I couldn’t even look at his damn face without feeling that rage all over again,” River admitted.
I was speechless.
"For years, I tormented him. Made his life hell whenever I had the chance and he let me. Maybe because deep down, he knew he was to blame, too."
He fell silent for a moment. And then, his voice dropped lower.
"But everything changed when I put you in danger."
I stiffened.
"I ordered you to spy on Mason because I knew he had feelings for you. Maybe the same way I did. I thought it would be the perfect way to get under his skin."
His fingers brushed against my cheek, his dark eyes filled with something I couldn’t quite name.
"But then you got hurt. Badly. And it was because of me."
I could hear the guilt in his voice.
"That was when I realized… I was no better than Mason. I had let my hatred blind me. And because of it, I almost lost you, too."
“River…”
His hand cupped my face gently, his thumb stroking my cheek.
"I haven’t properly apologized for that, Allison. I’m sorry. I’m sorry for being a prick. I’m sorry for using you as bait. I’m sorry for putting my grudge over your safety—"
I didn’t let him finish. I kissed him. His breath hitched against my lips before he melted into it, his grip tightening as if I might disappear. When I pulled away, I rested my forehead against his as I tried to catch my breath.
"We all get hurt at some point in our lives. Sometimes, it makes us better, but sometimes, it brings out the worse in us. I'm not in the position to judge how you deal with grief, but one thing I'm sure of is that, you're not a bad person, River. Sure, I initially thought that you were a bit arrogant for my taste but I know that you love as much as you hate. Maybe more. You loved Noelle and you did everything to save her but you still lost her.” I smiled at him, stroking his lower lip with my thumb. “I know that it's painful to lose a mate. I know that it must have broken you all these years. But you know what's amazing? That even after all the pain, even with all the brokenness, you still find a new reason to care and love again. And if putting me in danger that time was the reason you realized all that, then I’m not angry. In fact, I’m willing to go through all of that again if it meant that the broken man who was filled with bitterness and grudge would learn how to live again.”
River sucked in a sharp breath, shutting his eyes tightly.
"Damn it, Allison," he murmured. "Why do you have to be so…"
His words trailed off. He gritted his teeth as he swallowed hard. Then, he reached for me. His hands were firm yet trembling slightly as they cupped my face, his fingertips brushing over my skin with a tenderness that sent a shiver down my spine. For a moment, he just held me there, his breath warm and uneven against my lips.
Then, he pulled me in.
His lips crashed onto mine in a kiss that stole the air from my lungs. It was desperate, unyielding, filled with every unsaid word, every lingering pain, every ounce of regret and longing he had buried inside him for years. He kissed me like he was drowning, like I was the only thing keeping him afloat.
I welcomed all of that. I craved all of that. My hands found their way to his chest, gripping onto the fabric of his shirt as if I could steady the storm raging inside him. He groaned softly against my lips, deepening the kiss. His fingers threaded into my hair as he tilted my head back, taking more, demanding more. When he pulled away, I was a panting a mess.
“Noelle’s death had scarred me, break me little by little throughout the years. But if I lose you, then there’s no salvation left for him,” he murmured against my lips.
“I’m not going anywhere, River.” I stroked his jaw.
“Good. Because you hold the last shred of my sanity. And I plan to fight for you until the end.”
Hours later, as the final preparations were made, I stood on the veranda with my five Alphas—Liam, Mason, Wesley, Daniel, and River. They were watching everyone prepare for the inevitable war. Daniel cradled Amaris in his arms, rocking her slightly.
“You alright? You haven’t slept in hours.” Wesley turned to me.
I exhaled. “I feel like I just downed a whole liter of coffee.”
Mason gave me a thoughtful look.
“Earlier, you said they did a ritual to awaken your dragon blood, right?” he asked.
I nodded.
“So… does that mean you can control fire now?” He crossed his arms.
I let out a frustrated breath.
“I don’t know. I mean, I set one of the vampires who was trying to attack me on fire earlier, but… I don’t know how to do it again,” I confessed.
River took my hand, stroking my fingers. His brows furrowed like he was seeing something in my hands that I couldn’t.