Chapter 44 Out of Her Head.
Stephanie and Brooke are in Steph's room, getting her ready for her date with Luke. Steph had initially been super excited when Luke first asked her but now, she doesn't feel the same way. From Monday till now that it's Friday, she feels like all the excitement has been drained out of her. But yes, she's still happy she gets to go on a date with Luke. Sweet, nice, not a Playboy Luke.
You're wondering about the Playboy?
Well, Steph can't get her mind off what Chris told her five days ago. A part of her still believes it's some sort of prank. Things haven't been the same since then. Things between Steph and Chris have changed. To Stephanie, it seems like Chris is avoiding her at all costs. She thought that since he said they should forget that this whole thing happened, he'd pretend and act like it didn't happen.
But is it even possible to pretend that something as huge as that never happened?
No, she doesn't think so.
The few times that Chris couldn't manage to avoid her, he'd keep his face blank, expressionless, and mutters a 'Hey' to her. He wouldn't even call her Hazel like he used to and neither would he call her by her actual name. He also wouldn't give room for further chitchat, he'd disappear as soon as he gets the chance.
He no longer sits beside her during the classes that they have together. Even if Steph wanted to talk to him, with the way he's avoiding her like she has a very contagious terminal disease, she wouldn't have been able to.
And even though Steph doesn't want to admit it to anyone - not even herself - she misses him. She misses him and everything that comes with him. She hadn't realized how much he has rubbed off on her, how much his presence has influenced her. She even misses his cockiness. It's just really weird not having him around.
Well, he's around.....but distant. He's no longer there to disturb her during History class or comment during Maths. She didn't realize how much his being around - his presence - meant to her.
Sometimes, she'll find herself zoning out, thinking about how everything has changed. All these happened just because he ended up having feelings for her. If he didn't, things wouldn't have become complicated and she wouldn't find herself thinking about things she shouldn't think about. She wouldn't find herself realizing things she wouldn't have realized if all these didn't happen.
You know what they say, you never know what you have until you lose it.
That's her case. She didn't know how important Christopher Hayes was to her until all these happened.
She still remembers the exact words he said and the way he had said it.
"Perhaps it started the moment we first kissed during Spin the Bottle at Jason's party that I was so keen on finding out who you are......"
She didn't even think he could remember that she was the girl he kissed that night. When he'd said it, it had taken her by surprise. It had happened months ago and he didn't even know who she was then but somehow, he still remembers.
According to him, he started asking about her after that kiss. But there was nothing special about the kiss to him.
Could there have been?
To her, it was the best kiss she has had so far but she can't say the same about him. It would have been like any other kiss to him. He'd have had better, after all, he has kissed a whole truckload of girls in his lifetime. He'd have had a lot of practice so he'd know that she wasn't a professional. She probably seemed like a novice to someone as professional as he is.
So what was special about the kiss that made him yearn to find out who she was?
Could he have felt the same way she did?
Stephanie internally groans.
Those are the type of thoughts that has been running through her head all week and the fact that Chris is avoiding her only adds to it. Everything is messing with her head.
Or could he have told her that just to mess with her head?
Right now is an example of one of her zoning-out moments. As Brooke picked out an outfit for her, she zones out and now that Brooke is calling her name, she doesn't hear.
"Earth to Stephanie!" Brooke sings.
Steph finally zones back in and turns to see her best friend holding up one of the two dresses she bought for her at the mall on Tuesday.
Brooke raises a brow at Steph, watching her suspiciously. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing's wrong. What makes you think that?" Steph asks, avoiding Brooke's eyes.
"First of all, you zoned out and second, you've been off all week like something is bothering you. Do you think I didn't notice? You don't even seem as excited as you were for the date when Luke first asked you," Brooke points out.
Steph sighs, debating whether to tell Brooke that she's busy thinking about a guy who isn't the one she's about to go on a date with.
"I guess I'm a little nervous. I've liked Luke for a while now and now that I'm going on a date with him, I'm nervous. Where do you think he'll take me?"
Brooke lets out a breath as she rolls her eyes. She goes to sit beside Steph on the edge of the bed.
"You don't have to be nervous. You shouldn't be nervous, girl. It's Luke, the same sweet guy you've been friends with for more than a month now. All you have to do is let loose, be yourself, and have fun."
Steph nods. "I'll try."
"Who knows? You might have your first kiss with him after the date tonight," Brooke says, wiggling her eyebrows suggestively.
Steph blushes. "Stop." She covers her blushing cheeks with her hands and groans.
She wonders if the kiss will be better than the one she had with Chris.
"Now that that's out of the way," Brooke drawls, standing to her feet. " I think you should wear this."
She holds up one of the dresses and Steph shakes her head in disagreement.
"No. If I must wear a dress, I'll wear the other one. It's more simple," Steph states.
Brooke rolls her eyes. "Fine."
Maybe the date would help her get her mind off Chris.
After Luke meets her parents properly and has a talk with her father, they leave the house together.
Steph pulls her jacket closer to her body because of the cold air as they near his car.
He opens the door for her and she thanks him before getting in.
"So, where are we going?" Steph asks as soon as he enters the car too. She buckles her seatbelt and Luke does too. He turns on the ignition before answering her.
"I was thinking we could go see a movie and after that, we'd have dinner."
"That's okay by me."
Luke smiles and slowly pulls out of the driveway before heading down the road.
A few minutes later, Steph notices how familiar the parking lot that they're parked in is. Then she realizes that they're at the exact same movie theater Chris had brought her on Halloween night. When they had left the party and came here to watch horror movies which she enjoyed very much. Though she didn't tell and probably won't ever tell him -- she had fun that night. And she had thought it was really sweet of Chris to leave the party and take her to the movies.
"Steph?" Luke's voice snaps her out of her head.
"Yeah?" She glances at him.
"If you don't want us to go, we can go somewhere else," Luke says softly as if he's afraid to upset her. He noticed that she hasn't made a move to get out of the car since he killed the engine. She seemed lost in thought actually, like she left some part of her back home.
"No, no. It's fine. I just remembered something. I'm okay with us seeing a movie," Steph tries to assure him with a small smile.
'Luke's here worrying about you and you're thinking about your time with Chris here? You're impossible! Isn't that all you've done this week? Think about Chris?' Her subconscious chides her.
"Thank God," Luke sighs. "Let's head in, shall we?"
Steph nods. "Yes, we shall."
Minutes later, they're on their seats with popcorn and soda that Luke had paid for. They're watching the romance movie they're showing and Steph wishes Luke has asked her what genre she likes to watch. If he did, they wouldn't be watching this.
As the movie progresses, all Steph feels is boredom because the movie isn't just romantic, but there's nothing funny about it. She'll have tried to enjoy a romantic comedy because she does love to laugh but there's nothing humourous about the movie they're watching. She finds all the things the female lead does very stupid and annoying. Since there's nothing she can do, she sucks her annoyance up and sits through the movie. When the credits finally roll, she's even more upset about the ending because the female lead ended up with her best friend even though the other guy risked his life for her and obviously loves her more than her best friend.
She can't help but think about how she left with a grin the last time she was here but now, she has a frown etched on her face.
"So how was the movie? What would you rate it?" Luke asks once they're out.
"Three out of ten," Steph deadpans.
"It's that bad?"
"To me, yes. I can never recommend it to anyone."
"Wow."
"I'd have preferred watching a scary movie I've already seen than that crap," Steph says.
"You watch scary movies?" Luke inquires, surprise evident in his tone.
"I don't just watch them -- I love them."
"I didn't know," Luke replies.
"We don't know a lot of things about each other," Steph realizes.
"Well," Luke smiles. " That's what we're gonna do at dinner. Get to know each other better."
Steph smiles. "Sure." Just as they reach Luke's car.
After the movies, Luke drove them to an Italian restaurant. And now they're seated, looking through the menu for something to order. The restaurant isn't too classy or anything over the top so Stephanie loves it.
"So what are you ordering?" Luke asks, looking at her over the menu.
"I think I'll go for Lasagna. Yeah." Steph replies, closing the menu.
A waitress comes over to take their order and Steph notices how beautiful she is and how her eyes stay on Luke the moment she sees him. But unlike the bimbo that was flirting with Chris when he dragged her to that cafe, there's nothing flirty about her gaze. She just seems awestruck or fascinated by him. She's looking at him like she has never seen anyone like him before.
Steph begins to feel self-conscious. She feels like the waitress looks far better than her in her uniform.
Luke who seems undecided on what to order finally looks up and the waitress immediately diverts her gaze.
She clears her throat. "Can I take your order please?"
"Mushroom risotto for me and Lasagna for her," Luke informs her. He looks back at his menu, not bothered by the waitress' beauty.
The waitress jots it down and asks. "What would you like to drink?"
Luke gives Stephanie a questioning look and she shrugs. "I'm okay with water."
"Okay, water for her and ...."
"Water for me too," Luke completes the sentence.
"Your order will be served in a few minutes," the waitress says before walking away.
Silence envelopes them for a few minutes as they both look around to take in the restaurant's look.
"So...." Luke breaks the silence.
"Yeah?"
"Let's start."
"Start what?" Steph questions bemusedly.
"Getting to know each other," Luke muses.
"Oh, that. What do you want to know about me?"
"Anything and everything," Luke quips.
Steph bites her bottom lip and looks away.
"I don't know what to say," she admits.
She doesn't think anything is interesting or extraordinary about her that'll interest Luke.
"Say anything. Your likes, your dislikes. Just tell me things about yourself."
"Um... I like watching scary movies." Luke smiles at that.
"I have an older brother. His name is Brody and he's in college. I live with my parents. I love reading novels and my favorite genre is mystery/thriller. I don't enjoy reading horror though. It's funny to watch but not exactly when reading. And oh, I hate parties."
"Brody, huh? His name sounds familiar. Did he go to our school too?"
"Yes, he graduated two years ago," Steph answers.
"Wow," Luke says just as their order arrives.
After thanking the waitress, Steph takes a sip of her glass of water.
"And I understand you," Luke states. "Parties. There's nothing special about them. It's just an excuse for teenagers to get drunk and do crazy things. I think there's one tonight."
"There's always one party or the other, even on weekdays." Steph shakes her head with a smile.
"True. Let's dig in."
They begin to eat and as they eat, they keep talking. Luke tells Steph more about himself and they ask each other questions. Steph can't help it, she finds herself comparing every of his answer to Chris' own. His likes, dislikes, and favorite things.
Like when Luke says his date of birth is on January 4, Steph says in her head, 'Oh Chris' own is December.'
The more words that come out of Luke's mouth, the more she thinks about Chris and can't stop comparing them to each other.
And she doesn't think it's healthy in any way.
As she stares at Luke's blue eyes, she compares them to Chris' green ones and decides she prefers the latter.
By the time they're done with their food, Steph realizes that something is wrong.
Why does it feel like she can't get Chris out of her head?
Why has he been living rent-free in her head since Monday?
She's here on a date with Luke -- the guy she has always admired -- and she still can't get her mind off Chris.
Wait, does she......could she......no, no, it's not possible.
She can't like a player.
No, she does not.
When Luke asks her if she wants dessert, she stares at him for a while before answering.
She lies.
"I'm suddenly not feelin
g too well. Is it okay if we leave?"
Concern takes over Luke's features at her answer. "Oh, I'm so sorry. It's okay. Let me settle the bill and I'll take you home."
Steph smiles slightly. "Thanks."
She can't believe she just lied to Luke, of all people. He doesn't deserve it but she thinks she'll go insane if she stays any longer.
What she needs to do right now, is to talk to Chris.
She has to talk to Chris.
She might go crazy if she doesn't talk to Christopher very soon.