Chapter 22

The sky was bright and the sun was laying warm kisses upon my skin as I sat swinging upon our old childhood tree swing ...I enjoyed these quiet peaceful moments and truly cherished them because I enjoyed being one with my own thoughts. For they gave me time to really relfect and attempt to understand myself, my emotions. Still slightly confused by what had transpired recently It was all too much to wrap my head around truthfully and I was still struggling to make sense of it all. My mom was able to explain the situation a little more to me but just a few details it seemed to me. She said I had gone to a different place while we were all in the carriage is how she described it. One moment they were all talking and I was sitting quietly then suddenly I was in tears, hyperventilating, and gripping onto my mothers arm which frightened not just her but everyone else. Nobody had any idea what to do and it all happened so quickly they had not noticed that we had already arrived at the Sinclairs. The Sinclairs soon became suspicious as they were aware our carriage had arrived but still awaited us to join them to which they all came out and one of them had brought it upon themselves and had carried me inside supposedly, my mother had not told me who it was that did...

*** Helena had an unbeleivable grip on my arm, her mannerisms and sudden outburst frightened me but also pained me to watch as I had no idea how I could help my daughter, I had no clue what was going on with her either. My full focus on her I was completely frozen until the carriage door opened... Charles Sinclair swung the door open his eyes locked immediatly on my Helena, I have never seen a man with a look like that in his eyes. All of our eyes on him but he did not waste anytime to take control of the situation. He did not need to analyze the situation any further, with one swift movement he had removed helenas grip from my arm and she was carried away in his arms. Helenas father and I looked at each other asking each other with shared looks if we both witnessed what just happened in front of us. Not wasting anymore time we flew out of the carriage to follow charles closely into the home.

" call for a doctor. "

His orders sent chills down everyones spine, he was so calm but so demanding. Nobody questioned him we all just followed. Nothing else around him seemed to have mattered as his parents and brothers were calling for Helena and demanding an explanation, his chin remained up and his eyes never met anyone elses. As a mother I was still so afraid, so scared for what had just happened but I also came to a realization all in the same moment. How silly of us all along we could not set up what was already destined to happen...*

" Ms. Helena, a caller "

Braelia and I shifted our attention to the doorman that ripped me from my thoughts. Without a question I rose from my position and began to make my way inside our home with Braelia following suit. It truly did not matter to me who was calling upon me if I was being honest, my mind had been elsewhere and I just wanted to get the interaction over with. My thoughts on the whole idea of marriage had changed once more it felt like, and I was now contemplating once more what it was that I truly desired. I had just come to terms with making up my mind on Theo and I but now...

" Helena... "

Theo stood in the drawing room holding a pot of..well... they were certainly flowers. My mom stood behind him at a distance with a clearly fake smile she had forced herself to wear as she watched my every move with Theo as if I would not notice. Baltantly ignoring her I turned my focus back to Theo, I did a low courtsey to greet him before I accepted his flowers and passed them to Braelia. I felt a finger grace itself upon my hand, I flinched back at the unexpected touch that instantly made my skin feel like it had been scorned. Looking up at Theo his eyes looked taken aback by my reaction to his touch but he quickly wiped it away and cleared his throat as he looked down upon his shoes before he finally spoke once more.

" I have been concerned and wanted to check on you myself "

His eyes looked back up at me and he gave a pause, a window for me to respond. I have had no real desire to speak anymore so I did not do so when I did not want to. Instead I looked down at my hands as he continued.

" seeing you so limp in my brothers arms made me feel so sick, so guilty...it should have been me that saved you Helena "

Saved me? Overlooking that I just assumed it was him that had carried me into their home that day but clearly not, possibly James? I looked over to my mother who had conveniently shifted her attention elsewhere at the mention of it.

" I am so sorry Helena"

I held onto the chair that was closest to me and my focus remained on anything other than Theo. I could not form any kind of thought or any sentence to respond to him. The last time I had thought about us my entire body had rejected the thought alone of us being together. I wanted for this entire interaction to end and I had no desire to discuss anything with Theo so I just stood silently fiddling with my fingers that rested ontop of the chair.

" Another caller for Ms. Helena- "

all of our heads darted into the direction of the entrance, my mom bringing it upon herself to break the silence

" I think Helena has had enough excitement for the day may we ask whom is calling upon her ? "

My mother clearly did not want to overwhelm me and especially not with all of these unexpected visitors bust she as well seemed to have been exhausted from the awkward social hour..

" Charles Sinclair my lady "