Chapter 14—The Spa

The spa was more luxurious than Susan had imagined. The decor was state of the art, and they offered every service imaginable. She felt pampered as she padded down the hall in a white terry cloth robe holding a cold bottle of water. The attendant led her to a small room that smelled of incense. Soft music played a chorus of Asian bells.

The attendant helped her up on the massage table, covered her with a white sheet, and left quietly. Two small candles burned on a stand. Susan closed her eyes and breathed in the calming incense.

Susan roused when Fran came in minutes later and asked, “Is this your first massage?”

“It’s my first massage in a spa. I had a massage at my chiropractor’s office, but they only did my neck and shoulders. I’m here because Bruce gave me a gift certificate for Christmas. I feel positively spoiled.”

Fran tucked Susan’s hand under the sheet and reached for her other hand. “What a thoughtful gift. Bruce gave you the deluxe package.”

“I know. I feel a little guilty. I’ll be here the entire day.”

“It’s time well spent,” Fran said. “A woman needs to take care of herself. Where do you feel the most tension?”

“My neck,” Susan said. “It’s always been my neck.”

Susan lay on her stomach with her head lowered, feeling too relaxed to talk, but Fran talked incessantly.

“I can feel the tightness in your neck,” Fran said, kneading her neck. “I never would have guessed you had a worry in the world. I didn’t know librarians had stress.”

Susan was tired but felt obligated to answer. “It wasn’t my job. It was a past relationship.” Susan might not have volunteered the information, but the massage was opening her up.

“I was in a bad relationship before I met Max. I lost my self-esteem, and I looked like death. It took a year of counseling before I got the guy out of my head. That’s what they do—they get in your head. They make you think that you’re nothing, and pretty soon, you begin to believe it.”

“How did you get him out of your head?” Susan asked, desperate for any information that might help her with past trauma.

“I did visualization exercises. Whenever my ex would come into my mind—I would replace the thought with a favorite memory. I love the ocean. I would imagine I was walking on the beach.”

“That’s all you did?”

“It wasn’t that simple. Right after I ended the relationship—I drank a pint of vodka a day. I had to go to AA. It was a process.”

Fran pressed her elbow into Susan’s lower back.

“Whoa,” Susan said.

Fran laughed. “Whoa? I haven’t heard that before. Where are you from?”

“Ohio.”

“Oh, I think Max told me you were from Ohio. Max says, you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to Derrick. He said you’re homespun and sew Derrick’s buttons on his shirt.”

Susan smiled, feeling comfortable and relaxed. “Homespun? Well, I’ve never been called homespun before. I’m from a small village in the countryside where quilting is considered an art form. I started sewing at a young age. My mother always checked for loose buttons on my father’s shirts, and I’ve done the same. It’s a habit. I love being at home with Derrick and the dog. I’m going to start quilting again.”

“I’m envious of your life,” Fran said as she made long sweeping motions on Susan’s back. “I made all of the wrong choices when I was younger—and got involved with the wrong people. I have regrets.”

“It isn’t too late, Fran,” Susan said sympathetically. “You’re going in the right direction now; you have a good job, you’re in a good relationship with Max.”

“When you’ve been at the top, it’s hard to settle for less,” Fran said ruefully. “I was a Rockette. Everyone always said I had the best legs of any of the Rockettes.”

“And you still have the best legs,” Susan said. “Your life just took a different turn.”

“And you?” Fran asked. “Did your life take a different turn?”

Susan grew quiet.

“I’m sorry if I’m nosy,” Fran said apologetically. “It’s just that I’m always searching for answers. And you seem to have it all together. You’re the kind of person I want for a friend.”

“You’re mistaken,” Susan said, wincing as Fran pushed her thumbs into her neck. “I don’t have it all together. I struggle every day with my past.”

“Well, whatever you’re doing must be working. You look fantastic.”

“I’ve always thought of myself as being very ordinary. Sometimes I wonder why Derrick wants me—a librarian from Ohio isn’t nearly as exciting as some of the glamorous women I see in the casino. And I’ve heard that Jenny was quite a businesswoman.”

“Turn over,” Fran said. “And I’ll massage your feet.”

When Susan turned over, she could see Fran’s expression. She looked sad.

“Jenny was my best friend. I suppose you know, you look just like Jenny, but you’re the complete opposite of her. Jenny liked to live on the edge—she gambled too much and drank too much. It was a bad combination, not that I judge her.” Fran sighed. “A woman doesn’t get through life without making mistakes.”

Fran pressed into the middle of Susan’s foot with her thumb, and Susan felt a wave of relaxation wash over her.

“I guess I have trouble understanding why Jenny would have an affair when she’s married to such a great guy.”

“Jenny thought Derrick was controlling. She was a free spirit and would spend hours at the casino. But Jenny was also a hard worker and sold the big multimillion-dollar homes. She hated that Derrick’s entourage was around so much because they knew what she was doing. Jenny told me that Max had overheard her on the phone with Daren, and that’s how Derrick found out about her affair. After Derrick found out—he clamped down on her, and she became rebellious. Nobody told Jenny what to do.”

It entered Susan’s mind that Derrick had been mildly controlling, but nothing like Blaine. Besides, she’d never given Derrick any reason to complain—a homebody who and rarely went anywhere. And she wouldn’t be there today if Bruce hadn’t bought her the gift certificate.

“What about Daren? Was he married, too?” Susan asked, so relaxed that she was unable to stifle a yawn.

“His wife died of cancer two years ago, and they never had children. He’s a Mormon. Very religious. We were all surprised when we found out Daren was having an affair with Jenny. Many women are attracted to Daren, but he only seemed to have an interest in Jenny. Jenny told me that Daren was her soulmate, and she was going to divorce Derrick and marry Daren. She was crazy in love with him.”

Susan sighed when Fran placed hot rocks on her back.

“This is wonderful. I don’t think I’ve ever felt so relaxed,” Susan murmured.

Fran’s voice grew mysterious. “The rocks are my special rocks from a canyon in Sedona, Arizona. Jenny loved these rocks.”

Susan tensed, wishing Fran hadn’t told her she had used them on Jenny. And then Fran said something that haunted her.

“It was odd the way Jenny died. She didn’t have a heart problem and died of a heart attack.”

Susan lay quietly, absorbing the heat from the rocks. Had Fran intentionally planted a seed to arouse suspicion. Millie had said that Fran suspected Derrick murdered Jenny.

Susan’s entire body was tingling, and she was glad when Fran put hot towels on her back and left the room. She was too relaxed to process the information. But alert enough to know that Fran was grasping at straws trying to figure it all out. And the rocks? Had Fran put them on her on purpose, hoping to stir something up with Jenny?

The attendant arrived to take Susan to the next treatment, and Susan pulled forty dollars out of the pocket of her robe to tip her.

“Oh no,” Fran said, pushing her hand away. “Bruce has already taken care of the gratuity, and he was very generous.”

Susan was thankful that the girl who gave her the facial didn’t want to chat. And the mud mask on her face made it impossible for her to talk. After the facial, they did her makeup. Next, a hairstylist gave her a blunt cut, a shampoo with a head massage that made her tingle, and a straight style that complimented her appearance. When she looked in the mirror, she hardly recognized herself.

Derrick called as she was heading to the next room to get a manicure and pedicure.

“Honey, I have an important meeting tonight. I’ll be home at nine. I’m sending Bruce over to meet you after you finish at the spa. He’ll take you to dinner.”

“No, I can eat leftovers,” Susan protested.

“My meeting is at The Ranch in a banquet room with some high rollers. They’ll serve dinner. I feel guilty; I don’t want you to be home alone eating leftovers.”

“Okay, but I wish I were going to dinner with you. It’s been a long day. I miss you.”

“I miss you, too. We’ll sleep in tomorrow and have breakfast in bed.”

Susan smiled. “That sounds wonderful.”

Bruce was waiting for her when she walked into the lobby of the spa. He gave a low whistle. “I didn’t think you could look any better, and maybe I’m using the wrong words, but you look polished…like a sparkling diamond. He paused. “I get to go to dinner with the best-looking girl in town. I love your hair.”

“Thank you,” Susan said, taking his arm. “You really shouldn’t have spent so much money. That was a pretty expensive Christmas gift.”

“It’s to show my appreciation for all the dinners you make—and the great Christmas party.”

“I love entertaining,” she said as they strolled by the pool, then went inside and took the elevator to the casino.

They went to an Italian restaurant and ordered spaghetti and drank red wine from large round goblets. Bruce told her about his childhood and how he wanted to be an FBI agent from a very early age.

“My mother wanted me to be a dentist like my father, and she was devastated when I went to the FBI Academy.”

Susan leaned in. “You have beautiful teeth. They’re very straight.”

“I had braces,” he said. “And I hated those things.”

“Luckily, I didn’t have to have them.”

“Your teeth are perfect,” Bruce said. “You’re perfect.”

“Nobody’s perfect. I’m pretty nerdy. I line up my vitamins at night and take them in order.”

Bruce laughed. “You’re the only woman I know who brings attention to her faults. Most women try to hide them.”

“What about you?” Susan asked, her interest perked. “Are you nerdy?”

“I can’t go to sleep if I don’t floss,” Bruce confessed. “It’s hell when I’m spending the night with a beautiful woman, and I have to get up and go home because I have to floss. I blame it on my mother. She would ask me every night if I flossed.”

Susan laughed so hard she had tears in her eyes. When she stopped laughing, Bruce was gazing at her with a look of amusement.

“You seem so relaxed. You should go to the spa more often. How was it?”

“It was wonderful.” Susan sipped her wine. “Fran talked a lot. She went into great detail about Jenny. Was Jenny having an affair with Daren?”

“It looked that way. Derrick had a birthday party in one of the banquet rooms, and Jenny didn’t come home that night. Derrick was livid. He’d gone home early. She swore she drank too much and didn’t want to drive. She said that she got a room. But Derrick didn’t believe her. After that—it was downhill. They argued every day about trivial things. You could cut the tension in the house with a knife. It was bad.”

“Fran said there was a question about Jenny’s death because she didn’t have a heart problem.”

“Jenny was a heart attack waiting to happen. She was high-strung, and she would have a hissy fit when things didn’t go her way. I don’t know how many vases she broke in the house. I lost count.”

“That bad?” Susan asked, dipping a piece of warm bread in olive oil.

“Yes. When you walked into the house, it was like a breath of fresh air. Your laughter echoing throughout the house changed everyone’s mood. Derrick’s a lucky man.”

“I’m the lucky one,” she said with a big smile. “I’ve never been treated this way before. Derrick treats me like I’m important. When he goes to play golf, he calls me to see how my day is going. He tells me he loves me at least six times a day. I’ve never felt more loved.”

“I didn’t know how a relationship was supposed to be until I saw you and Derrick together. You genuinely like each other.”

“I had no idea I was capable of loving anyone the way I love Derrick. The chemistry between us is incredible. My heart skips a beat when he walks into the room.”

Bruce smiled. “Isn’t every relationship that way when you first meet? I call it the ‘honeymoon stage.’ It’s before you find out that your lover isn’t perfect.” He looked at her square in the eye. “Derrick has a lot of faults, just like every other man.”

“Like what?” Susan asked with a question in her eyes.

“I shouldn’t be the one to tell you; you’ll find out. “

“Give me an example,” Susan prodded.

“He’s a little obsessive-compulsive. He doesn’t like anything out of place. If he goes to the refrigerator to get a glass of milk—he wants the milk to be in the compartment on the right side. If it isn’t—all hell breaks loose.”

Susan nodded. She couldn’t help thinking that Blaine had that same trait. She’d attributed it to his military background.

“What are your imperfections?” Susan asked.

“I’m grumpy in the morning,” Bruce confessed. “And I don’t like waking up in the morning and seeing the woman I’d been intimate with next to me.”

Susan drew her brows together. “Why not?”

“By morning, her hair extensions are falling out, her mascara smeared, and her breath is bad. It doesn’t do a lot for my libido. If I see her at her worst—I never want to see her again. I carry that image in my mind.” Bruce shook his head. “Do you have any idea what a false eyelash looks like on a pillow in the middle of the night after you’ve had a few drinks?”

Susan laughed. “A spider?”

“Exactly. And then there was the lady with the exotic cat that I thought was a wildcat. When it jumped up on the bed, I ran like hell. Dating in this town is nightmarish.”

It was as if Susan was talking to her best friend—having fun and sharing secrets. She didn’t want the evening to end.

“Can we play the slots for a while,” she asked.

“Sure. We have forty-five minutes. Derrick won’t be home till nine.”

The slots were hot, and Susan didn’t want to leave. She’d won five hundred dollars before Bruce pulled her away.

Susan followed Bruce home in her car, and when she pulled up in the circular drive, she felt a wave of guilt, similar to the feelings she had when she was married to Blaine. She walked in the door, not knowing what to expect.

Derrick was in the living room reading the paper, and Ruffy was lying beside him. Susan exhaled. Everything looked normal. He looked up from his horned rimmed reading glasses, acknowledged her with a glance, then went back to reading the paper.

Tension filled the air. Susan turned on her heel to leave the room.

“Don’t ever be late again,” he said gruffly.

“I’m sorry,” she said, her voice shaky. “I asked Bruce if we could play the slots for a while, and I lost track of time.”

Derrick was holding his head slightly above the newspaper. “I know the story. I’ve heard it a thousand times.”

Susan thought Derrick looked intimidating in the horn-rimmed glasses. It was a side of him she’d never seen before. Every nerve in her body was standing on end.

“I’m going to bed,” she said, turning to leave.

Derrick threw the newspaper down and closed the distance between them. He grabbed her by the shoulder and held her at arm’s length. “You’re not going anywhere until we finish our conversation.”

“Don’t talk to me like that. I’m only a few minutes late.”

His dark eyes scanned her from head to toe. “You look fantastic. New hairdo—beautiful nails—looks like you had the works.”

Susan could feel the heat rising in her body. He knew where she’d been all day, and he had asked Bruce to take her to dinner. Anger seeped up her neck. She’d had to account for every minute of her day with Blaine. It was all too much. Susan wrests out of his grip.

Suddenly Bruce was standing at the doorway.

“I couldn’t help but overhear. It’s my fault. Susan wanted to gamble after dinner and was winning. I’m sure you’ve been there, Derrick.”

Derrick crossed his arms. His dark eyes bore into Bruce. “Don’t downplay it. I trusted you to bring Susan home after dinner. Maybe you were having too much fun.”

Bruce’s expression was one of exasperation. “You know I would never hit on Susan.”

Derrick’s neck grew red. “A man thinks about a lot of things when waiting for his best friend and his fiancé to come home. I thought about all the nights I waited for Jenny to come home. And some nights, I laid awake all night, and she didn’t come home.” His expression was one of disgust. “I don’t need another Jenny.”

Susan was taken aback. “Jenny? Do you think I’m like Jenny? Well, I’m tired of hearing about Jenny. And I’m tired of all the stares I get in the casino.” Her gray eyes flashed.

“Jenny, Jenny, Jenny…it’s as if she never died. Why can’t you let Jenny die? Everyone thinks I’m Jenny, and now you do, too.”

“That’s not true, Susan,” Bruce said, his voice firm. “You’re nothing like Jenny. This whole thing has been blown out of proportion.” Then he turned to Derrick and said, “Nothing happened. We’re just a little late. Everyone needs to calm down.”

Derrick looked pensive. “Go to bed, Susan. We’ll talk about it in the morning.”

“Oh, no, I’m not going to bed,” Susan lashed out. “I’m wide awake, and I see a side of you that I don’t like.” She pointed her finger at Derrick. “You and Blaine have a lot of similarities. I always had to account for every minute with Blaine, and I won’t do it again. I’m leaving. I can’t stay here another minute.”

Susan dashed out the door and jumped in the SUV. She ignored Derrick standing in the driveway, pleading for her to come back, and sped off, not knowing where she was going. But the car seemed to know—because she drove straight to The Ranch.

She strode to the slot machine where she’d won earlier, but a heavy-set woman, wearing tight blue jeans and blowing smoke into the air, was sitting there. The woman’s hands flew over the buttons. Susan sat down at the slot machine opposite the woman and watched her play. Three of a kind was coming up more than any of the others. She wasn’t getting good cards. Susan watched as the woman played her last credit. The woman got up and stretched, and Susan slid onto the warm seat.

“Good luck,” the woman said. “I just lost eight hundred dollars in that machine.”

“I’m sorry,” Susan said with a sympathetic look. Better luck.”

“Sure,” the woman said bitterly.

Susan took out a hundred-dollar bill that she’d won earlier in the day and slipped it into the slot. The machine grabbed it like a hungry lion, and her name came up on the small screen—Hello Susan. Welcome to The Ranch. Good Luck! The machine was like an old friend. She couldn’t believe it when she got the deuces on her second hand. Five hundred dollars, and she had only been there five minutes. She celebrated by ordering a rum toddy. Feeling generous, she tipped the server five dollars. Then she sat back looked at the cards trying to decide which cards to hold. Every time a negative thought came into her mind, she would have another toddy and concentrate on the cards. She got a royal flush—and when the waitress saw her big win—she came over and congratulated her, and Susan ordered another drink. Her mind was swimming as she watched the attendant pay her five thousand dollars in hundreds. Susan tipped the attendant twenty dollars. She smiled and wished her good luck.

Susan cashed out one thousand seven hundred and eight dollars. She tucked the money away in a compartment of her purse, next to her Glock. She had to pee, but she’d had too much to drink and wasn’t sure she could stand. The room began to spin when she swiveled the chair around to stand. Familiar faces sat opposite her.

“Are you having fun yet?” Derrick asked, unsmiling.

“Well, I was, but the room is spinning, and I’m not sure I can make it to the ladies’ room.”

“We’ve all been there,” Bruce said, extending his hand.

Susan handed Bruce her purse. “Watch my purse. There’s a lot of money in it,” Susan said as she grabbed onto Bruce’s arm. She was swaying as Derrick took her other arm. They helped her to the bathroom. She barely made it to the commode and vomited after she peed. Derrick splashed cold water on her face, and she felt better. But she knew it wasn’t over.

Susan felt embarrassed as Derrick helped her into his SUV. Bruce followed them in her car. Susan leaned back into the leather seat and closed her eyes. Neither said a word. After they got home, she went straight upstairs to the bathroom and vomited again. Then she took a shower and put on a silk nightgown.

She was thirsty for something carbonated and remembered there was ginger ale in the bar. Derrick was in bed with his arms crossed over his face. There was a dim light from the bedside lamp. She didn’t think he was asleep. She put on her robe and padded across the room, trying to be quiet.

“Where are you going?” he asked. The first words he’d spoken since The Ranch.

" I need a ginger-ale.”

“Get in bed. I’ll get it,” Derrick said, sounding grumpy.

Susan bunched the pillows and climbed into the luxurious king-size bed. It felt heavenly.

Derrick was back in minutes with a glass of ginger-ale and ice.

She took a swallow. “I’m sorry,” she said. “I don’t know what came over me…I….”

“Don’t talk about it. You’ll just make it worse. I think it would be best if you made an appointment with Jack for some counseling.”

Susan looked at him with furrowed brows. Then she took a long drink of the ginger-ale. It was quenching her thirst, and her stomach didn’t feel as queasy.

“Okay,” she said, feeling terrible for letting him down. She told herself tomorrow would be better. She would make it all up to him. She finished off the ginger-ale and put the glass on the nightstand.

Derrick switched off the light.

Susan turned her back away from Derrick and stared into the darkness. She was exhausted but wide awake.

“Still sick?” Derrick asked.

Her voice was curt. “Yes.”

“That’s too bad because you look hot.”

She felt him put his hand on her shoulder. His voice turned gentle. “I’m sorry, I guess, I had a fit of jealousy. You walked in with Bruce looking like a million dollars.” He kissed the back of her neck. “Damned—you look fantastic.”

“Thank you,” she murmured, wishing he would stop trying to make conversation and too sick to care about his apology.

“That was quite a jackpot you won tonight. How are you going to spend your money?”

Susan’s stomach churned. All she wanted to do was go to sleep, and he was dead set on engaging her in conversation. She was short with him. “Why do you always ask me that? I don’t know. I don’t need anything.”

She tensed when she felt Derrick’s hand on her shoulder. There was no way.

“I hope you aren’t thinking of going to Alaska,” he teased.

If you don’t stop talking, I’m going to go to the guest room,” Susan said. She yawned, turned over, and fell into a deep sleep.

Maybe it was a culmination of events that brought up Susan’s worst fear. She dreamed that she was in an elevator with Blaine. He had pinned her against the wall of the elevator and held a gun to her head. The sound of a gunshot echoed in her ears. She screamed a blood-curdling scream.

Derrick was shaking her hard, trying to wake her.

There was a loud knock.

“What the hell’s going on?” Bruce yelled.

“She had a bad dream,” Derrick said. “She’s okay.”

“Are you okay, Susan?” Bruce asked in a loud voice.

“It wasn’t a dream. It was a nightmare,” Susan said in a choked voice. “Blaine was in the elevator holding a gun to my head. He was going to kill me.”

“No one is going to hurt you,” Bruce said. “You’re fine. It’s never going to happen, okay? It’s never going to happen.”

“Sure,” Susan said, her voice full of doubt. “You know as well as I do that he’ll come for me.”

Derrick pulled her into him. “Go to sleep. Everything is okay.”

Susan snuggled close, feeling safe in his arms. “What about us? Are we okay?”

“We’re going to be,” Derrick said.