Sapphire
“I legit thought we were going to have to send for the fire brigade! Like seriously, he looked as if smoke was going to come out of his ears any moment.” Stacey scarfed down a sandwich after the Monday debriefing committee session was over and there was only Monica, Stacey and me left in the room.
“Were they fighting over you?” Monica asked wide-eyed, as she reached for a soda.
“Don’t be so silly,” I muttered. “They are enemies from a long time ago.”
“I don’t know about you, but I think he’s still carrying a torch for you. I saw it in his eyes.”
I shrugged as I reached for another sandwich. “That torch is called hostility. He was incredibly angry with me. He thought I should have stood by him.”
Stacey opened her mouth and I raised a hand. “Look, I really don’t want to talk about Zade right now.”
“Got it.” Stacey grinned. “You have to admit that it was a great day, though. I see this fair as just the beginning of bigger and better projects we can take on for the school. I mean, this time around we’re renovating the computer lab. Next year we can take on something else and so on for the years to come.”
“Speaking of alum, Sapphire, how did we do with the profits and pledges? Did we reach our target?”
I sighed. I hated to be the bearer of bad news. After Saturday night, I had spent a good portion of Sunday calling the pledges I’d been given. Sad to say, many of them were not donating as much as I had anticipated. “We are twenty-seven percent away from our target.”
“What about Zade’s promise?”
I looked at Stacey sharply. I’d told her what Zade had pledged, but I was hoping that we could work with what we had and do a partial renovation and raise the rest of the funds another time to finish the project. I did not relish the idea of taking Zade up on his offer.
“What promise?” Monica raised her eyebrows curiously.
I felt as though I could throttle Stacey, but I was being childish. Of course, my feelings must take second place. “Zade offered to pick up whatever shortfall we have.”
Monica’s eyes became as round as saucers with excitement. “Whoa! That’s amazing. So, what’re we waiting for? We just need to tell him how much to make his check for? Right?”
I hesitated and she repeated herself. “Right?”
“I… um. I don’t think we should get all our hopes up just yet. Suppose his offer was not genuine? The shortfall is close to a hundred thousand dollars, you know.”
“A hundred thousand?” Monica scoffed. “If we’re talking about Zade Herron, the software genius, believe me, he won’t feel that.”
“True. But?”
“There’s no ‘but’, Sapphire. He offered. We need it.”
I turned to look at Stacey. Her eyes were focused on me and it gutted me to see the hope shining in them. I took a deep breath.
“Fine, but we’ll need Arthur to do the official figures and give us a detailed breakdown of what the renovation will cost in terms of equipment, material and labor, and how much of it we already have. I don’t want to approach him with incomplete figures. This way he will see that we are legitimate and we are not asking for more than we need.”
“How soon can Arthur do that report?” Monica shot back.
“As soon as I give him our final figures. Some pledges have asked for a few days to honor their commitment. So, hopefully the latest should be by Friday and I will have the final figures for Arthur. I should be able to approach Zade by next week. If he’s good for his word, I project we will have a brand-new lab ready for the new school year.” I smiled tremulously at the thought of the feat we had undertaken coming to fruition.
Monica stood and opened her arms to both of us. There were tears in her eyes. “We did it. We really and truly did it!”
It was as though the reality finally hit us and we all hugged tightly in a group hug. Then Monica had to run and Stacey and I were left alone.
“That was a sneaky move, you know,” I said quietly.
She shrugged “I love you, Sav, but whatever you and Zade have going on has no place in our renovation objective.”
“Zade and I have nothing going on,” I huffed.
“Of course not. Let me correct myself. Whatever you and Zade will have going on?”
“You’re still using the wrong tense, Stacey,” I rolled my eyes at her cheeky grin. “There is nothing going on between Zade and me, nor will there be.”
She gave me a funny look. “We’ll see what time has to say about that, won’t we.”
I narrowed my eyes on her. “Do you know something I don’t?”
“I know something is not right. I don’t believe he stole that money.”
“Er… news flash. He pleaded guilty.”
“Sometimes people make deals for a lesser sentence, you know?”
I shook my head with exasperation. I couldn’t discuss this with Stacey. She was just too naïve. “Look. I know you mean well and think the best of everyone, but in this case you’re wrong, okay?”
“No, you’re wrong,” she shot back passionately. “You should be Mrs. Herron with a couple of little Herron’s running around. I don’t take you to walk away from a man in trouble or to be the snobbish type to hold a guy’s prison record over his head. I saw how you looked at him. Hell, you were vibrating with need.”
“Stop being so dramatic. I wasn’t ‘vibrating with need’.”
“Well, whatever it was, fix it and get the hell on with being happy and in love again. I could eat some wedding cake.”
“So, go get married then.”
“No thanks. I’m far too picky. I’ll wait for yours.”
I crossed my arms over my chest. “You don’t stop, do you?”
“Nope. And I’m usually right on the money too. You and Zade were made for each other. You’ll get back together. You’ll see.”
“You finally got the tense right – were. There is no more Zade and me. All I want is to get the check, and call it a day.”
My tone brooked no further conversation on the matter and though she made a face, she said nothing else. We finished cleaning up in a matter of minutes.
The restof the week was taken up between classes and working on the final report to present to Zade. I half-hoped that he would be one of the cop-out pledges who called to say he could not honor his word after all. It would give me some more ammunition to fuel my anger at him as well as make it clear that he was no good. I had nothing to regret. But all week, no call nor email came from him. I turned the figures over to Arthur on Friday afternoon and he promised to have the official report ready by Monday.
I spent the weekend grading final assignments as we were heading into two weeks of end of year tests. I started working on my report cards as well.
We had another committee meeting on Monday for me to present the final report. As I had predicted, the shortfall came to approximately ninety-seven thousand dollars and some change. Everything was neatly put together and accompanied by the necessary pro forma invoices and other related documents. I promised, with a pounding heart, to call Zade the next day.
Tuesday afternoon after the last student left, I sat staring at the business card on my desk. The letters swam before my eyes as raw panic took hold of me. I felt like a giddy schoolgirl about to talk to her crush. No. Wrong analogy. I felt like a prisoner about to have an interview with her jailor about the possibility of early parole. I tapped the card a few times before picking up the phone and dialing. It started to ring.
“Hello?”
“Zade Herron?” I kicked myself mentally. It was his personal number and there was no need to ask if it was him. Stupid!
“Speaking.”
I could hear the amusement in his voice. I cleared my throat and rushed on. “This is Sapphire Stone from Faelicity Middle School.”
“I know it’s you, Sapphire. To what do I owe this call?”
“I would like to discuss the donation you promised for the lab.”
“What about it?”
“I did as you asked and have a figure for the shortfall.”
“Okay. You can come by my office so we can discuss it further.”
I almost swallowed my tongue. “I beg your pardon?”
“I said, come by my office so we can discuss the matter further.”
“But, why? You said you would fill the gap. I don’t think there’s anything further to be discussed that we can’t do over the phone.”
“But I would prefer to discuss it face to face.”
“So that’s it then. This is your way of backing out on your promise. Typical. You build up our hopes and when the time comes to back your word you come up with excuses.” I knew I sounded irrational, but the anxiety I was experiencing just thinking about having to interact with Zade again was flooding through my veins.
“I’m not making excuses,” he said, his voice deliberately patient, “nor am I being unreasonable to prefer to discuss financial matters in person. I don’t see what the big deal is.”
I continued to lash out. To be honest I was now almost hysterical and had no idea how to regain control of my emotions. “The big deal is how hard the committee has worked and how hard all our parents and children worked to make this a reality. And now you’re being a scrooge!”
“I’m being a scrooge because I want a face-to-face meeting? Or maybe you’re being selfish thinking of how you don’t want to face me and just want a check in the mail. You’re the one who’s not thinking about all those parents and students.”
I felt as though he had struck a nerve with how on point he was. “Go to hell, Zade!” I swore, seething with anger.
“I’ve been there. I didn’t really like it so I came back. I bet you didn’t expect me ever to be free again, huh?”
“I don’t give a damn what you do.”
“Clearly you didn’t and still don’t. But then again, this isn’t about us. This is simply about you getting off your high horse and out of your selfish desires to come to my office and discuss the terms of the donation.”
“It’s not a loan. What terms could there be to discuss?”
“I’m sure it’s not a few pennies we’re talking about. There will be documents you need to show me.”
“I can email them.”
“And they will need to be examined and discussed on the spot.”
“The accountant can do that. I can give you his number and you can both arrange a meeting at a mutually convenient time.” I knew I was grabbing for straws desperately, but I couldn’t help it.
“Stop being so cowardly, Sapphire. It doesn’t become you. Now are we meeting at my office or will you find another source of funding? I don’t have all day.”
I took a few deep breaths as I struggled to calm myself. I felt as though I was caught between a rock and a hard place. But I felt myself relenting when I thought about going back to the committee with a negative report. How could I explain to them that the donation fell through because I did not want to face my ex-boyfriend?
I took a deep breath, feeling as though I was about to walk the plank, step up to the gallows, face the firing squad, and every other life and death scenario that there could be. I swallowed hard.
“When?”
“Are you free now?”
“Now?” I squawked.
“I’m sure school is over for the day. I’m still at the office if you come by right now.”
At first I was going to negotiate to see him tomorrow, but I realized the quicker I got over this meeting the less anxiety I would have to put myself through by waiting another twenty-four hours. The thought comforted me. “I’ll come now,” I mumbled.
“Good. The address is on the card. I’ll see you in a few.”
Without another word, he disconnected the call.
I stared at my phone. Bastard. I allowed myself the luxury of sitting and taking deep relaxing breaths for a full five minutes. Then I got up, packed up my belongings and left. I headed to the parking lot and was soon on my way downtown. It was just before peak hours so traffic was still light enough for me to get there in twenty minutes. I groaned when I realized that this evening I would be going with the rush hour traffic. I saw myself sitting in the parking lot marking papers while waiting for traffic to ease. There was no way I was going to be sitting in bumper-to-bumper traffic for two plus hours. All these inconsequential thoughts passed my brain when what I was really afraid of was seeing him again in an enclosed space.
Would I be able to control those old feelings?
I parked in the visitor’s section in the parking garage, surprised to find that the security guard was expecting me. I followed his directions and quickly found the lobby. As I watched the elevator climb to the twenty-second floor, my heart began to race.
Get in, collect the check, get out.
That was all I needed to do.
Get in, collect the check, get out.
And then never see Zade Herron again.
I kept my fingers crossed, praying that it would be that easy, but somehow I could not shake the dreadful feeling in the pit of my stomach that I was about to face the challenge of a lifetime.