Chapter 294 COLD REMEMBRANCE
Edeline
I never really hated Percival before that. He had done some stuff, sure—but it never made me hate him. Not until that night. That night, I hated him more than anything. My wolf hated him too. My skin side—yeah, she wanted revenge just as bad.
But then the truth hit me.
Darius was the monster. Not Percival.
I spent all of yesterday lying around, trying to make sense of everything. Today, I thought maybe a walk would help me clear my head, so I came here. To the waterfall—the spot I loved the most.
And now, here I am. Staring at his grave.
Why here? Why did they bury him here of all places? Not in the pack’s graveyard, where the rest of them are. No—right here, beneath the tree that used to be ours.
Our spot.
My throat tightened, and the tears started before I could stop them. My heart felt like someone had tied a rope around it and was pulling it tighter and tighter. I reached out, tracing his name on the headstone with shaky fingers, as if touching the letters would make this real.
I glanced up at the old willow tree trunk and spotted the little carving we made years ago.
D and N
Bff&a 2008
We were just ten when we did that. Back when everything was simple.
"Why, Darius?" I whispered, my voice barely carrying over the wind. "Why did you do this?"
The tears came harder, and I let them. I sank to my knees, fists clenched so tight my knuckles hurt as I hit the cold ground.
"Why did you have to love me? Why did you have to be... so messed up in the head?!" My voice cracked as the sobs tore through me, ugly and loud.
"Why!" I yelled into the wind, feeling completely broken. There was nothing graceful about it. I wasn’t the strong, put-together person everyone thought I was. I didn’t feel like the badass Luna, the warrior they expected me to be.
And my wolf? She wasn’t much help either. All she cared about was losing a packmate. Nothing more. She didn’t understand the rest.
I took a shaky breath, trying to pull myself together. I had to pull myself together. I wasn’t allowed to fall apart. I had responsibilities now. People were counting on me. I was supposed to be Luna, right? That was what I wanted... wasn’t it?
I leaned against the headstone, tracing the letters again, slower this time. The cold granite felt smooth under my fingertips.
"I hated finding out the truth," I whispered, like he could hear me. "What you did... what you really were. It broke me, Darius." My voice dropped to a whisper, barely audible. "How could you do that to them? To your own mate?"
I closed my eyes for a moment, my fingers still resting on his name. Maybe he was out there somewhere, listening. Maybe he was watching me from the moon, or whatever place wolves go when they are gone.
"You were my best friend," I said quietly. "How did I not see it? How was I so blind?"
The tears welled up again, and I wiped my eyes on my sleeves. My head felt heavy, my heart even heavier. How was I supposed to move on from this? How was I supposed to make sense of the Darius I loved... and the Darius who did all those things?
I stayed there for a while, just sitting against the tombstone, trying to figure out how I felt. The cool wind kept blowing, and the old willow swayed above me, its branches whispering secrets I would never understand.
Think about your closest buddy—the one person across the whole world who’s always got your back, no matter what. Now, imagine finding out that person is living a double life. Messing around with someone from the other side, just for fun. Someone who was supposed to be there for you, only to find out they tossed aside their best friend—their moon-given gift—because they were mad.
Mad because keeping that friend close kept them from getting to you.
It left me feeling hollow when I thought about Darius. Blindsided. I couldn't see anything coming—just like him. Innocent, not the sharpest. That’s me, too. But knowing what I know now, I still feel cracked, like a broken mirror taped together on the outside, sharp edges hidden underneath. I told myself I’d toughen up. Fix what was left of me. But the truth is, Darius was still buried somewhere in my chest, scratching at the edges of my heart.
And then there was Percival. I’ve been thinking about him a lot. But Darius, though...
Darius, man.
The crunch of leaves snapped me out of my head. Someone was coming. I wiped my face, sniffed hard, and scanned the tree line. A figure moved between the shadows, wrapped up in the cold shade of gloomy clouds overhead.
“Hey, Edeline? That you?” A guy’s voice. Familiar, but older somehow.
“William?” I croaked, quickly wiping my face again. I pulled in a shaky breath as he stepped out from the trees. He looked... different.
He wasn’t the William I remembered. No more deep worry lines etched across his face. Just a regular wolf now—still strong, still broad-shouldered—but with the look of someone who’d finally let go of a burden. Like he could breathe again.
His sharp blue eyes caught the light, and for a second, they reminded me of Darius. It hit me right in the gut.
“I heard you were back.” William smiled softly as he came closer, sitting down next to me without hesitation. “You’ve changed... A lot.”
I shrugged, keeping my expression blank. “Yeah. I guess we all have to change at some point.”
He glanced at the tombstone in front of us—his son’s tombstone. His gaze lingered on the name carved into the stone, and something shifted in his eyes. A flicker of pain that had settled deep inside.
Percival told me just a few nights ago that he’d kicked William out of pack life. Said he’d sent him off to the old cabin by the lake, only letting him attend functions if he got a personal invite. But sitting here, William didn’t seem bothered. He looked... calm, like a man who’d made peace with something ugly.
“I really loved Darius,” William said after a moment. His voice was quiet. “I know you did too. And even with all the crazy things he went through... he loved you, Edeline. I need you to know that.” His eyes locked on mine, soft but heavy with meaning. “If I’d known what he was capable of, I would never have let him get close to you. But Darius...” William exhaled slowly, rubbing the back of his neck. “He wouldn’t have hurt you. You were the only one he could be himself around. Normal, even. Except for that one night he got poisoned—did he ever scare you? Like, really freak you out?”
I stared at the bold lettering on the stone, my throat tightening. “No,” I whispered. “He never gave me any reason to worry. That’s the part that messes me up the most... How did I not see it? How did I not know who he really was?” My voice cracked, and I winced, like the words tasted bitter on my tongue.
William let out a long, tired sigh. “Edeline... Darius was sick. But maybe he seemed like a good wolf to you because you were the reason he got better.”
I blinked, stunned. “Better? He had a shrine for me, William! He killed and assaulted his own mate! How does that make him better?” My voice was low but sharp, cutting through the cold air between us.
William pressed his lips together, giving me a knowing look. “Trust me, Edeline. I know how it feels to discover that someone you care about isn’t who you thought they were.” The distant look in his eyes told me he wasn’t just talking about Darius anymore.
He shifted, glancing back at the stone. “Look, I know it’s hard—what he did. What you’ve found out. But you can’t let it eat at you, Edeline. You’ll never be the same if you do.” He paused, like he was choosing his next words carefully. “I’ve learned the hard way that you have to move forward. You can’t dwell on this stuff. It’ll ruin you if you let it.”
I clenched my fists, feeling the weight of his words press down on me. But how the hell do you just stop thinking about something like that? How do you let it go?
“I can’t stop,” I whispered, my voice cracking under the pressure. “Every time I think of him, it’s like the memories come rushing back. The things he did, the things I didn’t see... It all just comes back.”
William stayed silent for a moment, letting the weight of my words hang between us. I stared at the name carved in stone, feeling that familiar ache claw its way back into my chest.
I thought I’d buried it deep enough, but here it was again, creeping up when I least expected it.
"Edeline." His hand closed around mine, steadying the tremor in my fingers. His grip was firm, but not tight—just enough to hold me in place. "I get that Percival had a huge part in why you left... and the pain you went through. But, honestly, would you have left if Darius wasn’t dealing with his own mess?"
I bit down on my bottom lip, mulling it over. The question hit me harder than I expected.
Yeah. I would’ve left because of Percival. Him and Tatiana—they were too much. I wanted to leave. I really did. But the thought of saving Darius? That’s what tipped me over the edge. What really threw me was how William kept skating past the fact that Darius had been poisoned. Like that wasn’t a big part of why he lost control that night. And then it clicked—William knew something else. Something about Darius that I hadn’t found out yet.
If Darius hadn’t been in such deep trouble... Honestly, I still would’ve left eventually. But I wouldn’t have gone the way I did. I wouldn’t have disappeared into the night like that, leaving things messy.
“Yeah,” I admitted, my voice low. “I would’ve still left. Just... not that night.” I glanced down at my jeans, tracing the frayed edge of a tear with my thumb. “Percival really messed me up. My wolf was ready to take out his pup, William. I couldn’t let that happen. I had to get out of there.” I exhaled sharply, feeling the weight of those memories pressing in. “But if Darius hadn’t been in trouble... I think I would’ve reached out for help. Maybe from my parents. Maybe even you.”
I dragged a hand through my hair, frustration bubbling up in my chest. “My wolf scared me, yeah, but Darius? He scared me more. I hated leaving the way I did, but... I was so freaked out.” A bitter laugh slipped out, and I shook my head. “It’s messed up, but I was more worried about Darius than what my wolf might’ve done to that kid.” Shame prickled under my skin, making my stomach churn. “If Darius had been okay, I wouldn’t have left like that. And Percival...” I hesitated, my throat tightening. “He wouldn’t have killed Darius. He wouldn’t have lost his mind over losing his dog, his partner. And he wouldn’t have tried to take his own life.”
The words sat heavy between us, like stones sinking into the earth. I let out a shaky breath.
“But,” I continued quietly, “he also wouldn’t have become the wolf he is now. He wouldn’t be the top dog.”
And Darius... Darius would still be gone. No way around that. What he did was unforgivable. Percival would never have let him slide.
The moon always seems to have a reason for the things it throws our way. Doesn’t make it any easier, though.
William gave my hand a gentle squeeze, rubbing slow circles over my knuckles with his thumb. “See? You really cared about Darius. And he cared about you too, Edeline.” His voice softened, carrying the weight of old wounds. “That’s why I laid him to rest here. He loved this place. He used to tell me how much it meant to him because of you.” William glanced at the tree standing tall nearby, its branches swaying gently under the gray sky. “I think the reason you haven’t healed yet... is because you haven’t really dealt with what happened between you and Darius. Not Percival.” He tilted his head slightly, studying me. “I think you’ve already made up your mind about Percival. But Darius? You haven’t faced that yet.”