Chapter 295 A HAUNTING PAST
Edeline
I stared down at our hands, chewing on his words. He might have a point.
When I left and went to Conrad’s place, I told myself I was moving on. I threw myself into letting it all go—this life, these people, everything. But once I got some space, the wolves around me nudged me toward the truth. They made me confront my feelings about Percival, especially after I caught myself feeling jealous over him. He was just my friend, nothing more, but still... I had to deal with that.
But Darius? I buried that pain deep and left it to rot. Never talked about him, never thought about him for too long. I got stronger, yeah. But I didn’t heal. Not really.
And that’s why I’m still stuck.
I turned my head toward William, blinking back the sting in my eyes. “How am I supposed to feel about him?” My voice cracked, and I felt my throat tighten again. “Look at what he did.” I swallowed hard, trying to keep it together, but the words dragged me down, making my chest feel heavy. “How am I supposed to make sense of that?”
William closed his eyes for a moment, taking in a deep breath like he was preparing himself. When he opened them again, they looked older, like he was carrying more than just his own grief.
“The truth is, Edeline...” he said slowly, “I kept his crimes under wraps because I knew the pack would challenge him... and kill him.” His voice was low, almost apologetic. “I figured he deserved whatever came his way. It’s hard, being both a dad and an Alpha. But I also thought...” He paused, rubbing the back of his neck, searching for the right words. “I thought it would be easier for you this way. I knew that finding out what Darius had done would wreck you. And... it did.”
His confession hit me like a punch to the gut.
I stared up at William, confused, my dark hair whipping across my face in the breeze. He held my gaze, steady and calm.
“Don’t dwell on the bad stuff about him, Edeline. It’ll make you crazy.” His voice was quiet, as if speaking too loud would stir up old memories. He looked out toward the horizon, his expression distant. “Trust me, I get it. You gotta focus on the good—what you remember, the side of him that mattered to you. If you don’t, it’ll just hurt. And once you let those unanswered questions dig in too deep... you won’t be the same.” His voice dropped to a whisper at the end, like he was drawing from something buried deep—something about his own son.
Smart stuff.
I rocked a little where I stood, fingers twisting in my hair. Frustration boiled under my skin. “I just... I don’t know how to do that. All this stuff messes with my head.”
William gave me a small, almost sad smile. “Think about the good times. Talk to him if you need to. Don’t get stuck on who he was. Remember what he meant to you.”
His words hit me in the chest like a punch—and that’s when it clicked.
I hadn’t really let go of my grudge against Darius.
Even with him buried six feet underground right next to me, I still hadn’t let it go. Not fully. Not even close.
The moon, in its own strange way, was teaching me a thing or two about forgiveness. And maybe... about fixing the mess left behind by all these wolves.
Maybe I couldn’t go back to being the person I used to be. That girl was gone. But I could still find some peace in this—maybe even some closure with Darius.
I gave William a small grin, feeling a little lighter. “Thanks, William. I’ll... I’ll give it a shot.”
…
As I made my way back down the mountain, my boots crunched over sticks and leaves, each step bringing me closer to home—and stirring up a knot of nervousness in my stomach.
I’d spent way too long talking with William. The other wolves would be out and about soon, and I knew I couldn’t avoid the Luna role forever. But that was a problem for later. Right now, I just wanted to focus on my own stuff.
Like Darius.
Could I really do what William said? Just let go of the bad parts? Stop obsessing over the worst of it?
He killed someone he was supposed to care about—for me.
The thought made my skin crawl. I felt sick imagining those hands—those hands—touching me, knowing now what he had done to his mate. When had he touched me? Was it right after?
The idea made my insides twist, like I was going to be sick.
I took a breath and whispered a quiet plea to the moon, asking for the strength to forgive. I’d already let go of so much... maybe I could do this too.
Maybe.
Because if I wanted to be Luna—if I had to be Luna—that’s what it was supposed to be about, right? Forgiveness. Grace.
But just hearing that word—Luna—made my stomach churn all over again.
…
I still hadn’t talked to Percival since... well, since our little “reunion.” He’d been giving me space, which I appreciated, but the silence felt strange.
After that night—after all the chaos between us—I’d been knocked out for the whole next day. Barely managed to get moving again this morning.
I’d arrived back in town two nights ago. I hadn’t planned on staying, but one thing led to another... and I ended up at Percival’s place. We’d had fun—too much fun, really. And after crashing at his place, I’d slipped out before he woke up.
I knew I couldn’t hang around and deal with his concern—or the weirdness that always seemed to follow us.
The whole night had been intense, and after the mess we made tearing his room apart, I left him a note on his pillow. It was easier that way.
…
Percival,
No worries, I didn’t bounce. Just went to my parents’ place. I figured I shouldn’t stay in your bed all day—didn’t want to stress them out.
And, yeah, I guess I was holding onto a bit of dignity... even though I’m pretty sure everyone heard us last night.
I’m still figuring out how to handle all these feelings. But I’m trying. We’ll talk soon.
I just need some time to heal first. I’ll swing by when I’m ready.
For sure,
Edeline
Everything feels so different for me now. My emotions are all over the place, like I have not really dealt with them yet. I have just been keeping them tucked away. I went through a lot when Tatiana was expecting, with all the back-and-forth drama between Percival and his dad wanting us apart. And then, Darius came at me. Watching him get killed right in front of me, while believing my friend was a monster, was a lot to process. I have to admit, my heart keeps breaking inside me, and honestly, I have not really faced it.
I listened to a thirty-eight-year-old widowed Alpha, trying to keep everything inside and avoid feeling that pain. I know it was a dumb move, but hey, it actually worked out. He totally gave me Dr. Phil vibes, but we did not get into anything too serious. It is not really about what I think of Percival or Darius. Looking back, Conor really was not in tune with his feelings at all, which is why he ended up rejecting the pup he raised as his own. I really have to get my thoughts together.
I guess I will chat with Percival. Sure thing! I am just feeling a bit nervous, I suppose. My heart started racing again when I was with him that night. The chat we had later on still lingers in my mind. Hearing those words really got to me, especially coming from someone who had been both kind and tough on me.
I have no idea how the pack thinks of me since I left.
That morning, I quietly slipped out of my old room and headed to my parents’ place. Everything felt just like it always did. I tried my best to shower, even though my legs were not cooperating. After that, I just chilled in bed for the rest of the day. I really did not feel like moving since my insides were pretty messed up, to be honest.
Mom popped in to check on me after catching a whiff of my scent around the house. She had this knowing smirk on her face that made me roll my eyes.
“Hey, it is totally normal for you and your partner to have a physical relationship. You are not a little pup anymore. You are mated and a Luna at such a young age, too. The youngest in history, right? But you will always be my pup. Even though you have only been a shifting wolf for a bit over a year, you are still a grown female. No need to hide the fact that you were with Percival last night.” She gave my leg a friendly pat, her smile warm and encouraging. “Here, drink this tea. It will help you out. Your dad and I had quite the memorable time, and I was on bed rest for a few days.” She sighed, a hint of nostalgia in her voice.
I used to freak out and turn red all at once, but this time I just smiled. It felt great to catch up with my family.
Mom laughed a little as I grabbed the mug from her hand, murmuring a thank you.
“Hey, you are a warrior now. Not so little anymore. But Edeline? Seriously, you should listen to Percival. Let him share more with you. He has been a bit wild without you around. Give him a shot. He has changed, and while I sometimes worry it is not for the best, I can see he is slowly improving. With you by his side, I truly believe you can help him heal.”
A frown creased my forehead. “What do you mean he got worse?”
Mom’s expression shifted, sympathy flashing across her face. “You do not know that part? Well, after he started training to keep his sanity, he kind of… snapped. No wolf could be around him because of all the aggression. He took out three challengers just for stepping up to him. He really intimidated the pack, but they are starting to respect him more and more. Having you here is just the cherry on top.” She smiled sadly, and I could sense the weight of her words.
I was totally confused by that. I heard about the challenges straight from Percival, but…
When I thought of Percival, it felt like a chill night wrapped in warmth and tension. It was just us, and my wolf was chatting with me, urging me to figure things out.
After Mom stepped out, I heard my dad come into the hallway, and they chatted for a bit. I felt super awkward when she mentioned I was with Percival last night and that I needed a day to chill. I wanted to scream that he should just chill and wait to see me. I just wanted my privacy, you know?
Ugh, I might be a lot of things, but feeling confident about my sex life around my parents and the people close to me? Not really. To me, a sexual relationship with your partner is something that is pretty personal.
I just chilled in bed all day, doing my own thing and trying to forget about everything else.
When this morning rolled around, I felt way better. I could walk around without looking like I had just been smashed into walls, a desk, and a mattress.
Those thoughts had me reminiscing about the good old days with Percival when everything was so different. He was unique. He did not seem so boyish anymore, even though it had only been six months. No, he was all grown up now—picking me up with confidence—and it made me feel a bit exposed, shy, and kind of tiny. Where was that warrior side of me when I really needed it?
As I hurried past the pack house on my way back to my parents’ place, I glanced around and noticed the lights on in the room where Percival was sleeping on the third floor. I really hoped he did not spot me. I told myself I would chat with him. Sure thing! But first, I had to hang out with my family for a bit. I still had not seen Nixx, and it was really bugging me.