Chapter 28 Chapter 28
Audrey
What had I done?
What the hell had I done?
“Arms up my love.” Gabriel’s voice broke through my thoughts and I shook myself. Staring around the room like I was just realising that we were home.
Not my home.
His.
I was perched on the edge of his bed. My legs swinging like a child and my arms hung limp at my sides.
“When did we get-“ even my voice sounded strange. Like it didn’t belong to me. Letting out a groan I rubbed the heel of my hands against my face hard, hard enough that lights exploded in my vision.
“Home?” Gabriel answered softly. He was pacing. The tips of his giant feathered wings brushing the rug with every step. I watched him for a second before dropping my head into my hands.
“You shouldn’t be alone tonight.” He said finally coming to a stop in front of me. “You shouldn’t be alone ever again.” Shrugging off the wings he let the drop to the floor with a low thud.
My head snapped up to stare into his eyes. His were intense. The blue seemed well- too blue. Unnatural almost.
I looked away.
“Don’t,” he caught my chin with warm fingers and turned me back to him. “Don’t look away from me Audrey. Don’t pull away.”
Taking a shaky breath I forced myself to relax. “I just don’t know what is happening.” I admitted. “I don’t know why I said the things I said to my friends earlier.” My voice shook. “You knew Johnny was there and you-“
“Yes.” I wouldn’t lie to her now. “Yes I made sure he saw. He needed to Audrey because otherwise he would live his life thinking he had a chance.”
“He might have if you had left me alone:”
Falling to his knees in front of me, Gabriel took both of my hands. “No he wouldn’t have. You might have let him take you out, maybe you would have let him touch you but it would have been fake.”
I remained silent because he was right. Johnny was a great guy. Sweet and innocent and everything that Gabriel was not but my heart didn’t speed up when he was near.
It had taken my stalker to go away to realise I was crazy about him.
Or maybe I was just crazy.
It was hard to know the difference anymore.
“You don’t -“
Hands on my cheeks he drew our face together. Our noses touched. Well my face and his mask.
“Yes I do know that Audrey. And so do you. This is more than attraction. It’s a connection that goes beyond the physical. I know you felt it as well. When our eyes first met all those years ago.”
I closed my eyes. “I did. And I know-“
“You know that for me it’s always been you. Since that moment. I was so broken.” A mirthless laugh escaped his lips. “So absolutely shattered that death was really the only option for me. Can you imagine being seventeen and not wanting to live.”
“I know. I read your diaries.” I whispered and was sure he smiled under the mask.
“I know you did Audrey. That’s why I left them for you.” He chuckled. “I needed you to know that you are the one that saved me. You dragged me back, with nothing but your smile. Every time I feel myself falling it’s you that pulls me back from the abyss.”
“You’ve killed people.”
“Bad people yes. The kind of people hurt children. The kind of men who would hurt you.”
I swallowed hard. “You kill men like the man who hurt you. Did you kill him as well.”
He didn’t even hesitate. “Yes.”
“How old was you?”
He shrugged. “Sixteen or seventeen, I’m not sure. That time of my life is all a blur, the only thing I remember clearly is the pain,” he closed his eyes for a second before snapping them open. “The pain and you. I survived it because of you.”
I reached for him before I could help myself, my fingertips slipped up his throat and traced the rubber seam against his jawline.
He caught my fingers before I could slide them underneath and shook his head.
“You were strong, you would have got through it on your own. Your soul is-“
“I don’t have a soul Audrey.” He chuckled.
“Of course you do,” again I tried to touch him and again his hands caught my wrists.
“I don’t. That man ,he ripped my soul out and shredded it when he broke my body and made me into a monster. But I have you. I share your soul Audrey. The beautiful light of it keeps my monster at bay because - because hell Audrey. Don’t you see? I am nothing without you. Just darkness blowing away in the wind. You keep me grounded. Your soul keeps my blackness at bay. Your smile-“
“Am I ever going to see your smile?”
He blinked once in surprise. “I don’t have a smile,”
“Yes you do. Sometimes.” Again I reached for his mask and this time he let me run my fingertips under it. “Sometimes I can see you smiling because of your eyes.”
‘My eyes?” He looked confused and I couldn’t help it. I laughed.
“Yes Gabriel, your eyes. And I’ve felt your lips because when you kissed me earlier-“ A blush crept up my cheeks. “Well-“
“Did you like me kissing you?”
“Yes.” I didn’t even hesitate.
“Then-“ his chest rumbled as he took a deep breath. “Kiss me.”
I blinked at him in shock. “I can lift your mask?”
Silently he nodded. “Up to my nose. No further Audrey.” Gabriel’s hands loosened around my hands and then dropped to my lap.
Slowly , tentatively I lifted the rubber from his face. His hands clenched into fists against my legs and shook.
“It’s ok.” Why was it so important to me to make sure he knew that. No matter what I saw, it would t change anything.
The scars I had felt on the left of his neck and jaw continued upwards, marring the lower half of his cheek and pulling one side of his lip upwards in a smile that seemed almost joker like but not quite.
My gut twisted.
Bad, the scars were bad. Like half of his skin had begun to melt.
“You’re disgusted.”
Was I? Was I disgusted? Instead of meeting his eyes I stared at his lips.
They were perfect. Full, but not too full. His cupids bow was pronounced.
In fact I had never seen lips as perfect as his. They were almost pouty and they looked so soft that I wanted to-
Surging forward I pressed mine against his.
Gabriel tensed for just a second before his arms wrapped around me and crushed me to his chest.
It lasted no more than five seconds before we pulled apart. Panting I leant my forehead against his.
“You are beatiful.” I whispered against his mouth. “Like an angel.”
He didn’t say a word just shook his head. “You don’t mean that.”
Capturing his face between my hands, I forced him to look at me. “You are beautiful.” I said again more forcefully. “And when you are ready to show me the rest of your face I will still think you are beautiful.”
His lips curved up in a smile. “You mean that don’t you?”
“I don’t know why you would doubt me. I just lost-“ I froze. “Jesus I just gave up all of my friends.” Groaning, I shook my head. “Bethan is never going to forgive me.”
“So?” Standing up, he pulled me up with him. “So what if she doesn’t. You don’t need them Audrey. You have me.” With firm hands he turned me, and began working on the satin ribbons that held the corset together. “We don’t need anyone else. Not ever.”
“Not ever?” Twisting I looked over my shoulder at him. “Gabriel we need-“
Two warm firm hands slid up my spine. “No we don’t. You don’t need anyone but me Audrey.”