CHAPTER 17

Tobias didn’t like the tone in Chris’ voice when he called him. Already he had sent some men ahead to meet him. He stayed behind to take on a much more dangerous mission. Tobias hesitated and stood around for a couple of seconds. The neighbors were noticing him, and his cowardice was now entertainment for a handful of people. Unable to take the silent judging anymore Tobias knocked on the door. Once it opened, he stepped in, he couldn’t wait for an invitation.

“Hey! I didn’t tell you, you could come in.” Jessie spat out.

“I just need to get out of that hallway. They looked like they were about to lynch me.” He shivered at the thought.

“It might be because of this, douche bag.” Jessie led him to her laptop and played the video.

Tobias gasped as he watched stunned. His publicist had managed to keep the questions about his missing wife to a minimum. But now his shame was online for everyone to watch. There were parts of that day that he hadn’t seen, but his infidelity was there, documented for everyone to see. He vaguely remembered what happened that day. He only had one image etched in his mind, the way Marietta looked at him when she left, “Who had this camera?”

“Sam,” she answered, “Marietta wanted to tape your genuine surprise. Apparently, you don’t have that many honest moments on tape. Surprise it’s you are on candid camera.”

“So, Sam leaked this.” Tobias tried to communicate with her while listening past the sarcasm.

“He called, apparently one of his flings took his camera for revenge. She found the tape and sold it to the highest bidder. I’m surprised you didn’t try to stop it.” Jessie smirked.

“I didn’t know about it.” Tobias peered into the laptop and saw a different video on the play list. “What’s this?”

“That’s a video of the day the ladder fell on Marietta.” When she saw him click on it, she tried to warn him, “I wouldn’t watch that if I were you.”

Tobias didn’t listen. He played the video and as soon as it was over, he felt as if someone had cut his legs from under him. “This isn’t what you described.” Sure, the ladder was there, but Jessie had failed to mention its enormity. He had seen her water break, how did Jessie describe it again- flood gates, but it seemed more like a river of blood seemed to pour out of her. Marietta didn’t just scream the sound that escaped her lips made his stomach churn and his heart shatter into millions of pieces.

“Why did you come here?” Jessie shut the laptop and redirected his attention. She could see all the color drain from his face, and she was sure he was going to pass out at any second.

“Chris called, there is trouble,” he managed to gasp out, “Pack your bags, we are going to Minnesota.”

“Why did you bring me here?” Marietta asked as she stepped out of the truck and stood before a huge log house.

“I thought we could get away for a while.”

“I don’t run.” She stared at him, square in the face and the strength in her eyes had him staggering.

“I know.” He feigned a smile. “Mama, could you please help Marietta inside.”

Chris stood back and watched as his mother help Marietta into the house. He wondered why Tobias hadn’t gotten back to him yet. He tried to call but his phone was off, Jessie’s too. He looked up at the blue skies and hoped that the man upstairs wasn’t going to forsake his friend.

Marietta lowered herself into a rocking chair. It was placed just in front of the windows. From where she sat, she could see the whole farm. The scenery was beautiful. It was like something that she could only make up in her mind and try to put down on paper. She laid her hand on her belly and rubbed in a circular motion as the baby began to kick. “Beautiful, don’t you think,” she said to the baby inside her.

Marietta was convinced that her baby could hear her. She felt this overwhelming connection with the life growing inside her. She wanted to protect her; this baby was her fresh start. She knew that Chris had been worried about her, so was she. Usually, she managed to restrain her demons but being here in Minnesota where it had all begun, she felt herself being dragged back into the void.

She missed Tobias and wished she could hear his voice. But she didn’t know how she would react to seeing him. Every emotion that had to do with him, she felt. But then being in this environment, those emotions seemed to take a back seat to the memories her hometown seemed to resurface. At times, she could feel everything, the pain, the fear, and the desperate need to disappear. She felt that now and having been face to face with her father the fear was what she felt the most. Chris was trying to be her anchor, but his knowledge only made him sink into the abyss with her. She needed Tobias, whose ignorance might just actually save her.

Marietta had told Chris that she didn’t run, but that was a lie. As soon as she was old enough and had the money for school she took off. There was a reason why her movies were always in faraway locations, she felt safer there. She had run away from Tobias and now all she wanted to do was to run away from here. But watching the birds and gazing at the clear blue sky seemed to have a calming effect on her.

She gazed at the scenery and for a second, she thought he was standing right in front of her. He was in his long trench coat, his ball cap lowered to just above his eyes. He had been watching her for the past two months. When she sat out on the porch, he was there just a few feet away, he stood outside her bedroom window and just watched. He was everywhere in her reality and in her imagination. Her father’s eyes looked right through her, demanding that she yield to him. Marietta closed her eyes thinking that if she didn’t look at him, he would disappear. The sound of Chris’ voice cut through her thoughts, she opened her eyes and was relieved to see just the green pastures.

She kicked at the window seat in front of her and noted that it sounded oddly hollow, “What’s this?”

“Don’t tell my mom, it’s where I keep my guns,” he said, “It’s purely for sport. I’m not some serial killer.”

“Good to know.” She chuckled.

“What do you think?” Chris asked as he came up behind her.

“I think I need to go back home,” she said in an almost whisper.

“Why?” She heard the panic in his voice, and she knew something wasn’t right.

“You need to get back to living your own life. You can’t babysit me forever.” She mumbled, “I have a husband I need to talk to, a job I need to get back to.”

“I thought we could spend Christmas here,” he lied.

“Christmas? What month are we in?” She asked in a daze. Had she started losing track of time already? This wasn’t a good sign.

“We are in December. Christmas is two weeks away.” Chris moved and crouched in front of her, “The year is also two thousand and twelve and Obama is the president.”

Marietta laughed. The concern in his eyes was obvious, but she appreciated that he was trying to take her out of her panic. “My first Christmas without my family.”

“Hey and what am I, chopped liver. I know the Hardens have grand Christmas parties, but no one can make a mean barbeque like I do.” He chuckled.

“My peach cobblers are also going to be earth shattering.” Marietta turned around to see Mrs. Bennet standing behind her. The old woman had a heart of gold that was where Chris got his good nature from.

“I guess my in-laws will have to settle for a phone call this holiday.” She laughed when Chris did his happy dance. “You better make the best barbeque of your life; the baby and I will settle for nothing less.”

“Tough crowd.” Marietta giggled when he lowered his mouth to her belly and kissed her. “When you get out of there, I will give you the meanest steak you will ever taste.”

Marietta sighed as guilt overcame her. Here Chris was talking to her belly, and she couldn’t help but feel like she had denied Tobias the same opportunity, “I should really call Toby.”

“That’s a good idea.” Chris dialed Tobias’ number and tried to act as discreet as possible. And when he heard the message tone that was when an idea came to him. He wasn’t sure that Marietta would communicate her feelings or go back into her shell. She seemed to be opening to him, and he was almost sure that she would tell him her true feelings. He was going to record the message and send it to Tobias. That way they cut through the red tape and went straight to the source. It bugged him that he was helping the man who cheated on his best friend, but Chris had a plan of settling the score his own way. Now all he needed was to get Marietta emotionally exposed to her husband.

“If he were here, what would you say to him?”

“What?” her brow furrowed in confusion.

“If I was Tobias and you wanted to communicate your emotions to me, what would you say?” He sat on the window seat in front of her and pulled her rocking chair closer to him. “He’s obviously not as handsome as I am. But imagine that I am a Caucasian, short, almost cute man with girly lips.”

“Kiss me lips.” Marietta corrected as she smiled. From the way she looked at him, Chris knew that she was thinking about it, in fact she looked like she had already made up her mind.

“Sometimes I sit, just like this, my arms around my baby and staring into space. I can feel her kick, I feel her hiccups and when she’s moving around. Then out of nowhere I see him, my little boy. He would have his father’s lips and his beautiful brown eyes would be covered by curls of hair from his head. He would have my nose, but his laughter would be his own.” She chuckled as Chris noticed she was looking past him and into something that only she could see, “He would be sitting at my feet, his toys littered everywhere in the room. His laughter would fill the room and his little voice-,” Marietta closed her eyes just as a tear rolled down her check. Chris couldn’t look into her eyes but the smile on her face was so infectious he had to smile. Closing his own eyes, he let Marietta take him into her perfect life, “Then Toby would pick him up, turn him upside down and tickle his belly. I can almost hear his giggles and my heart would jump out to catch them. Then he and Toby would come and sit next to me, and then he would lay his little head on my belly. He and his sister would already be so close, just like David and I.”

Chris opened his eyes at the mention of his best friend’s name. He stared at Marietta as the smile was long gone and a blank expression had replaced it. And just like that he saw panic on her face, but Marietta didn’t open her eyes, instead she went on. But the dream soon took a turn, and it was back to the nightmare that started almost twenty-three years ago.

“But he was there. Every time I managed to be happy, he would show up and take it all away from me.” Her eyes flew open and the emotion in them had Chris staggering back, “I love my husband but sometimes I can’t feel it because Robert has possessed me. But it was getting better because Toby filled my every thought, each void in my heart and mind and his love was soon overtaking the darkness. For the past three years, the fear was there but Robert wasn’t because Toby was. But after I found him in bed with Sarah, I knew it was because of what Robert did to me. He stripped everything that is good in me and left me with his ugliness and disgust. Toby will never be able to love me, not truly because I don’t feel like I’m worthy of such love. If he decides to leave me for Sarah, I’ll let him go.”

“But he loves you.” Chris urged her.

“You don’t hurt the people you love.” The tone in her voice sliced at his heart.

When she closed her eyes and eased back into the chair, Chris stopped the recording. He didn’t know if he should send it to Tobias. He felt like he would be betraying her, but he wasn’t out to hurt her. He knew that Tobias, although unknowingly, was the only one who managed to keep Marietta out of the darkness. Tobias had a right to know. He walked away from her, and after seconds of a battle between his heart and mind Chris sent the voice file. The second Tobias landed he would find his message and the voice file.

Somehow this was going to get better, he didn’t know how but it would.