Chapter 95 RIGHT CALL
WILLA’S POV
There had been times when my children’s questions had left me speechless. There had also been times when I simply didn’t know the answer.
This time, it was both, and it seemed like I had lost my voice as soon as Gillian threw her question.
But even if I could speak, I still wouldn’t know what to say anyway. Words were quickly slipping out of my mind, and those I could grasp didn’t weave into a coherent answer.
Because really… How did one explain something so complicated and so difficult to a pair of young children without confusing them or hurting them?
But I knew I had to give Gillian an answer, so I cleared my throat, hoping it would remind me how to make my voice box work again. Then, I spoke, regardless of the fact that my mind was still floundering for the right words to say.
“I think,” I started, but I ended up pausing, my tongue flicking out to wet my lips. “I think everything your Daddy has done to humans is very bad and… and difficult to forgive or look past.”
And as I said this, I tried not to get fazed by the intense gaze Gallahan had on the side of my face, or the way the comforting caress of his thumb on the back of my hand had completely halted.
“But you see, love, Mommy isn’t always wise and kind and loving. I was young back then, and…” I paused again, finding my mouth a little too dry for my liking as I mentally grappled with the words that were abandoning me at a faster rate now.
My chest began to flare with icy anxiety, and I longed to pull and twist my fingers, but my other hand remained in Gallahan’s hold.
So I ended up bouncing my left leg under the table as I powered through, saying, “It was difficult for me and your Daddy to see past the big difference between us. At that time, neither of us could see past the wall that divided us. So I thought leaving him was the right choice. I couldn’t stay with someone whose values and beliefs did not align with mine. And I still think it was the right choice, to be honest.”
A sad frown tugged at Calisto’s mildly pouting lips while he gazed at me searchingly with innocent eyes, as if he could pry more explanation out of me if he just looked at me hard enough.
Meanwhile, Gillian looked at me in a way that made her seem doubtful and confused in the same breath. “Really? But why?”
“Wars are violent, love. They’re cruel, and given how our families are fighting against each other, it wasn’t… it wasn’t a relationship that could work. It wasn’t a relationship that was safe and healthy. And when I learned I was having the two of you, I became more certain that my decision had been right. You were my priority, and I wouldn’t allow any of you to get in the crossfire. Both of the war and of the rocky relationship between me and your Daddy.”
“I would’ve stood by you, though,” Gallahan whispered.
I turned to look at him, squeezing his hand. “No. I don’t think you would’ve.”
A certain light glinted in his eyes, reminding me of the young Han I met that fateful night six years ago.
Fiery. Earnest. Disarming.
His mouth parted, ready to argue his opinion, but I gave him a weak smile and a subtle, almost imperceptible shake of my head.
“We were too young, too different and too involved in the war, Han. We would’ve fought more. Look at us even now… We still fought several times despite the years we had to mature. We wouldn’t have had the sensibility and the level-headedness to navigate parenthood together while we were enemies, while we were still so blinded by our own convictions.”
“But the war ended,” he said resolutely, as if that fact alone could change everything.
“Yes, and I’m glad that it did,” I replied easily, giving his hand another squeeze. “Even then, the aftermath was ugly. You know this. A lot of people were still angry, Han. They’ve lost a lot in the war, after all. Not just their lands, their home and their freedom. But their loved ones too. Riots broke out more than all of us could count. There were even attempts to kill you, the Alpha King and my Grandpa because of their displeasure about the agreed terms on the treaty.”
Gallahan’s jaw ticked, and his nostrils slightly flared, making it obvious that he knew he was losing the argument. Still, he said, “And yet, all three of us are still here. None of those attempts succeeded.”
“I know. But imagine if… Imagine that those angry people knew about the twins.”
This left Gallahan quiet. He looked away, fixing his stare on the smooth surface of the dining table, a pensive look settling on his face.
At the lack of response, I returned my attention back to Calisto and Gillian, who had remained quiet throughout my exchange with Gallahan. “I wanted a quiet and safe life for the two of you. I wanted to make sure of that. And given who your Daddy is, it was hard for me not to worry about the two of you, especially whenever you go outside.”
“But it’s fine now, isn’t it, Mommy? You are not fighting anymore. There’s no more war.”
“That’s right, Cal.”
The hope shining in Calisto’s eyes intensified, and it was heartbreaking to dim it down with our reality. “Does that mean I’m also right that what Daddy did before doesn’t matter anymore?”
“It still matters, Cal,” I refuted gently. “Because there are things that aren’t for us to forgive and forget. So to the people who had been affected by what he did, it will always matter.”
Calisto’s shoulders drooped, and tears sprung on his eyes, making them glisten.
Beside him, Gillian didn’t fare that differently. She had a crushed expression on her face, which she valiantly tried to erase as she asked in a wobbly voice, “So… So what does that mean for our us?”
I snuck a glance at Gallahan, who hadn’t said a word for a little while now. He was still staring at the table, but he was now harshly gritting his teeth as if he was preparing for a hard painful blow to land on his face.
Even his grip on my hand had grown stiff and tense, seemingly afraid I would slip through his fingers and out of his life in the same manner I did before.
My ribcage felt like caving in at the thought of it.
He really wanted to stay with us…
So to save him from the fear of getting booted out of this house and out of our lives—a fear which I was sure was niggling in every crevice of his mind—I said, “It means we just have to put in an extra effort to keep our family together. Because within this family, we actually have the luxury to move past what had happened six years ago. And just like what Cal had said, we can teach your Daddy to like humans and to always choose kindness from now on. Yes?”
But even as I said so with a small sure smile and a firm, even voice, I was mentally praying to the moon goddess that I had made the right call.