Chapter 32 - Axel

My head was full of things. If it wasn't enough to deal with the daily problems I had to face, I still had to break up a fight between Dorian and Carbon. Then I had to watch Dorian smoke and question him about it. Now I have information that I can't tell Amelie or EVE because it would be a shock for them to know that Dorian was in trouble again. Besides, seeing Carbon and EVE in bed made me start to question how enough I must not be for her.

EVE had rejected me so many times that I already felt insecure about some things. At the beginning of it all, from the moment she appeared, I had already taken a personal interest in her, and it took a long time for her to give me a break from her. It took a long time for her to allow me to touch her. I fell more and more in love, but I wasn't serious about her. All I was to EVE was someone she could have great sex with. Now, with Carbon taking to the clouds, I was afraid of being discarded since her interest in me was purely sexual.

"Did you get through to her? Is she all right?" I called Dorian, asking about Amelie. I was completely relieved when she answered the call herself. "Wait, why do you have Dorian's cell phone?" I asked, already suspecting something. After seeing EVE get up to mischief, I was pretty shaken up. In fact, I'd barely slept, but I couldn't lie around depressed like a teenager. I was past that stage.

"Because he's here," she replied suspiciously. "Axel, what are you implying?" she asked, questioning me. I always forgot that Amelie wasn't naive. She was just different from EVE.

"It's nothing, I just…" I said, trying to find a way to justify myself to her, but already failing. I really needed to get over this horrible feeling and get on with my life.

"Axel, I know what happened. Dorian has already told me everything, and I'm sorry," she said. I wanted to throttle Dorian for telling her. Of course, she would find out somehow, but it didn't have to be so fast. "I know it wasn't me, and I also know it's not my fault, since Dorian's insisting on it, but I can't help feeling responsible. So excuse me, in fact, excuse EVE," she asked. Amelie seemed to care a lot more about EVE than EVE cared about her.

"I've already talked to EVE, and she doesn't care, Amelie," I started to say. I wouldn't defend her just because I liked her. I really didn't. "Actually, I think you should be careful with her, Amelie. She didn't care about me at all, let alone you. If everything was painful for her, I can only imagine how it must be for you," I said, worried. "Are you really all right?".

There was a certain silence. "Well, I'll get better," she said slowly. "Don't worry about it, Axel. It's no big deal. At the moment, I'm more worried about you two," she said. Occasionally, I wondered why I had never been interested in Amelie. She was great, loving, cute, and she cared about me. Perhaps the fact that I'd never allowed myself to be there because he'd always liked Dorian. In my mind, maybe she would never look at me. At that moment, I fell in love with her.

"You're not coming to work, are you?" I asked, still worried. "Amelie, if you come to work in this state, I swear I'll swear at you. And if Dorian lets you come, you can tell him I'll beat him up for being irresponsible," I said, slightly angry. Knowing Amelie, she was probably thinking of showing up at Lowe's.

"I want to see you try," Dorian said on the other end of the line. Amelie had probably put him through it at just the right moment. She was clever. "We're going, see you," he said, and then he hung up.

I stayed in the store, tidying up and serving customers. My mind was still spinning with the scene from Carbon, but what bothered me most was EVE's attitude towards me. She had been so rude and uninterested that I felt our connection might actually be in danger. What if it was? Was it worth investing in someone who made it clear she wasn't interested? Did I really deserve to keep running after someone who didn't want me? I wanted a family, or at least I was at the stage of wanting one. I deserved one.

In the afternoon, Dorian arrived with Amelie. I thought she would at least stay at the store, but her plan was to actually work. She had already changed out of her uniform, and Dorian did the same. "Are you serious?" I asked Amelie, as I waited outside the fitting room. "You're going to work with that pain? You own the store, you don't have to clock in," I said, in case she had forgotten. Anyone else in her place would never have gone to work.

"I have nothing to do at home, Axel," she replied from inside the fitting room. "I can't just sit around doing nothing, especially since EVE is a fragment of my life. I'm not going to let her wrong attitudes get the better of me," she said. Normally, Amelie pretended to be strong in situations with EVE, but at that moment, she seemed to mean it. "Besides, I won't stay all the time. I heard one of her messages, and I got a therapy appointment today. Dorian's taking me," she said.

"I can take you if you like," I replied, intending to help and stop worrying. "You can spend more time with your friends too, you know," I said. Then she came out of the fitting room and faced me.

"What do you want, Axel?" she asked me, already wearing her uniform. I couldn't blame her for being suspicious of me. "Are you trying to get out of work?" she said wryly.

"I think I just need a break. Besides, he always takes you, so it's nice to do something a bit different," I said, trying to convince her to let me take her. "By the way, what's to say you'll get into the session? Maybe you'll change your mind and run into Dorian's arms," I said, emphasizing that I knew what had happened last time. She laughed and punched my shoulder lightly, asking if EVE had told me. I confirmed it. In the end, she allowed me to take her, and then she told Dorian, who, to my surprise, didn't mind looking after the store. I found it suspicious but concluded that possibly he wanted to smoke a bit. I wondered how long it would take for Amelie to find out, or for him to tell her. Perhaps I will tell her myself at some point.

We worked for about two hours before Amelie called it a night and went to change. "You're going to smoke, aren't you?" I asked Dorian, while Amelie was away. "Or is there another reason you're letting me take you?" I asked, curious. Living in a gossipy environment made us gossip. The same applied to Dorian himself.

"I didn't let you take her, Axel. She's the one who chose you to take her. Besides, you're no threat to me," he said, convinced of himself. Sometimes Dorian could be irritating.

"How do you know? I could be falling in love with her," I said, lying, although part of me was afraid it was true. Dorian stared at me, and I could have sworn he felt threatened, but he'd given a much better answer.

"Even if that happened. It would still be me," he replied. The worst part was that he was right. Then Amelie showed up, and we left.