Chapter 18

He slammed the door and stormed out. I took a deep breath to calm myself down. I can not imagine that his geste

will only get worse now. I allowed

there was still hope for him to change. But what I see now is contrary to my anticipation. " I really do not understand him presently!" I said to myself. I gentled my son’s forepart and kissed her. I apologized for what his father did in front of her. still, I am sure it hurts her so important to be rejected by her own father, If only our son could understand. " Always flash back that mama loves you veritably much, baby," I said emotionally to my son as I carried her in my arms. A many moments latterly, I laid her down in her crib. She was sleeping soundly and I could not stop being emotional while watching herface.I can not be bothered staying for Ransom. " Always flash back that mama loves you veritably much, son," I emotionally said to my son as I carried her in my arms. " Why are you torturing me like this, Ransom? Why?" I asked myself. I did not realize that I fell asleep because I was tired. I woke up when I realized that I neglected my child because I fell asleep. I incontinently stood up and was surprised to see Beth next to baby Yumi's Crib. " I came by thenMa'am. I did not knock again because I suppose you fell asleep. I do not want to wake you up," Beth said with a smile. " Thank you, Beth. I am really sorry if I fell asleep. perhaps I was just too tired," I explained. " You do not need to explain,Ma'am. It's my obligation to take care of the baby because I am her sitter. I am paid to do my job well," Beth answered calmly. " I know, Beth. But as a mama , I prefer to take care of my child," I said. She smiled at what I said and I did the same to her. I was suddenly quiet when I flashed back Ransom. Beth could not avoid asking me about him. " Where is Sir Ransom? Did not he come home just now?" Beth asked. " Ahm, He's back to his work," I answered. Actually, it's not easy to lie, especially when I am not a fabricator. But I do not want Beth to know that my hubby and I aren't really okay. " Beth, can I ask a question?" I asked. " Of course,Ma'am. What's that?" I asked. " You suppose men do not want to have a son or a baby girl?" I asked. He was obviously surprised by my question and her face showed curiosity. “ Is this about Sir Ransom? Does he not like baby Yumi?" she asked directly. I could not answer her question right down. I swallowed slaver and tried to smile at her. " Ahm, no!" I answered in a fear. I heard Beth shriek in front of me. She obviously did not believe what I said. "Ma'am, it's not that I am snooping in your hubby and woman

's relationship. But it's egregious that you and Sir Ransom have a problem," she said seriously. " If the reason for this is the gender of your child. That shouldn't be anissue.However, he'll accept your child as much as his love for you," she added, If he loves you. I do not know what to answer her. She has no idea what really happed and I can not tell her. I tried to smile at what she said and thanked her because ever I could talk to someone. At least my heart felt better. " Thank you, Beth." I smiled thanks. " As long as I am then for you,Ma'am," she replied with a smile. I want to cry in front of her at those times. I want to release all the pain I feel. But I can not because I do not want to be weak in front of other people. I do not want them to say that I am so soft and so stupid. After our discussion, I ordered her to test the baby's milk downward because Yumi was crying. I couldn't give milk from my bone yet. " They say breastfeeding is better, Mom. Baby is healthier," Beth advised me. " I know that, Beth," I answered. I spent several nights watching over baby Yumi. Meanwhile, Ransom and I were together without saying a word. that is how we set it up. But I still don't lose stopgap that he'll change. Despite my frazzle, I still do my duty to serve him as awife.I prepare clothes for him indeed though he does not wear them. " This is what you wear," I said. " What right do you have to tamper with my effects?!" he said angrily. " I'm your woman

so I've the right to take care of you," I answered. " We're married only on paper. Flash back that!" he said forcefully. " No matter what you say, I am still your woman

!" I answered forcefully. This time I did not give up. I bravely answered him and stood up for beingMrs.Crosby. No matter what he does or says, I am still his woman

. " You know how to fight now! Are you proud of commodity?" he asked me angrily. His two eyebrows met while looking at me. The vexation on his face was apparent. But I did not budge and I had the courage to fight. " The only thing I am holding on to is our marriage. We are married so I've the right to what you do not want and what you want," I forcefully answered him. He heaved at what I said and his face was obviously shocked. He stormed out of the room and I just shook my head. I took a deep breath to calm myself down. I really do not know where that man's bad heart is coming from. How did he inherit it if his parents are so kind? I just concentrated my attention on other effects. I concentrated further attention on taking care of Baby Yumi. " Baby, forgive daddy if he is always angry, huh?" I said gently. " Let him be kind too. I guess he is always stressed at work," I added with a smile. I tried to smile in front of my child indeed though deep inside I was hurt. I was hurt by what was passing between me and Ransom. I was hurt by what he was showing me. " If it was not really because of you. I wouldn't put up with that man!" I said to myself while facing our son, Yumi. After a while, someone knocked on my bedroom door. " That is hereafter," I said. The door to my room sluggishly opened.