Chapter 193
I wrapped my arm around Zenon, feeling his strong muscles underneath my grip. He seemed so strong to me. How could this be taken away from him?
"Nothing's happened yet," I told him, "If you want to play, you can still play. We'll take care of your-"
I stopped myself in my tracks. My fingers lifted from around his shoulders and I breathed out, "You aren't taking care of yourself, are you?"
I began to piece together the last time we came here together. This was hard for me to say, "You brought me here once and told me to pretend to be your mom so you can sign some papers."
Because he wasn't following doctor's orders and he'd been trying to cover that up.
Did anyone else know? Who was supporting him with this bad decision?
Playing basketball at the highest level would destroy him physically, wouldn't it? Doctors' orders are to rest, and he isn't resting. Coach, his father, the competition... no one was letting him rest.
"That's why it's been difficult," he said, "And why I struggled to tell you."
Finally, it was making sense. It felt like I'd decoded a cryptic message.
"It's wrong what you're doing," I said.
"I know," he answered, pulling me into his arms and resting his head onto my shoulder, "Do I want a minute of knowing I made it or a lifetime of knowing what could have been?"
I turned my head to face him, to look him in his blue eyes and to ask, "You'll risk a lifetime for a minute?"
"Depends how long a minute can last."
60 seconds, Zenon.
That's what a minute is.
I didn't feel like now was the time to say it. It wasn't the point he was trying to make, but still.
We spent time in silence, studying each other's faces. He held onto me as if I was a support system of some kind.
He had told me his story.
He'd shared his burden. This clinic was somewhere he first came as a scared boy, and now it was a reminder of the risks he faces every time he decides to play the game.
I kissed his lips and said, "You really know how to pick a date spot."
He opened the car door for me, and we walked towards a food truck that overlooked a pasture. There was a small collection of trucks that people had gathered around, pinned against a backdrop of the setting sun.
"I've never been here before," I told Zenon.
This was far away from our town and in the opposite direction of the beach. Zenon wasn't a fancy restaurant kind of guy and I wasn't a fancy restaurant kind of girl. In a way, this was an ideal date for the two of us.
"You like tacos, right?" he asked me, zipping my jacket up for me.
It was getting cold as the day faded into evening. We had spent the first part of our date at a rehab clinic and now for the... date part. His hands released from the metal zipper on my jacket, and he brushed his thumb softly against my cheek.
Then Zenon opened the trunk of his car and pulled out a thick blanket.
He nodded towards the grass. And that's when a thought - a random thought - came into my head as quickly as it disappeared:
I'll remember tonight.
I don't know why I thought that. I felt happy in this moment. This memory would stay with me long after we left high school.
So many things in life kept moving, kept changing, but this night felt very still. His hand clasped onto mine and our fingers entwined.
We were away from home, about an hour away from school, but it felt like another world. A world where no one knew us. No one here was whispering about us, or wondering why Zenon Albert was dating me, Candace.
He was just Zenon here.
The blanket wrapped around our bodies and my legs draped over his. Our empty taco plates lay to one side on the grass nearby.
"You have a little..." his thumb reached out and gently pressed under my lip.
He rubbed the sauce off my chin and kissed my lips. I smiled through the kiss and his hand rested against the back of my head, his fingers sliding into my hair. The blanket tumbled from around our shoulders and lay on the grass. He deepened our kiss, leaning me back until my back felt the grass.
"You have a little there too," I pressed my thumb against his cheek where he had absolutely no sauce there.
It was an excuse to touch him.
He turned his head and kissed my hand as it lingered on his cheek. He trailed further up my arm until he reached my shoulder and kissed my neck.
I closed my eyes to feel him. His hair ruffled against my skin as he sucked on my neck. His forehead rested against my skin and I heard him sigh.
He pulled back and confessed, "You surprised me, Candy."
"What do you mean?" I asked, trying to see his expression.
"Before you came and crushed all my laptops, I was sure I knew how senior year would end," he said, holding onto me. "I never expected you."
Oh the laptops - I almost forgot about that.
Before this summer, I only knew Zenon by name... and by watching him from my bedroom window. I used to think everything came easy to him, but the real Zenon was much more disciplined than I imagined. He works hard. He trains hard.
It's funny how the things people say about someone settle into one's subconscious. I felt like I knew Zenon before I even met him - because of what people say, not because of what I saw.