It's night time, that much I can tell.
I haven't really been out of my room, due to me crawling onto bed and falling asleep as tears freely fell down my face.
None bothered me which gives me relief, especially with Keith not seeing me like this, proving that I expected way too much from this marriage then we'd pretty much discussed. Well, I hope he didn't come in.
I'm still in the same clothes I was in from morning and now , more then ever with this exhaustion, I'm in need of a long shower. Not wasting time , I get up from the bed, switch on the bed side lamp and head to the bathroom.
Divorce.
The word alone crashes in mind , reminding me of why I was in this state hours ago. I'm in love with him yet till now he hasn't ever noticed nor gave thought to us working out. Shaking my head , I undress and step into the shower and once the water hits me, everything seems to fade away and I'm just surrounded by numbness.
Stepping out after what feels like a while, I wrap a towel around my body and my hair, wanting it to dry. Stepping back into my room, my eyes snap to the envelope on my bed and once again, a swirl of emotions come at me, in full force.
Sadness, disappointment, heartbreak and anger?.
What? I don't think I've ever really felt anger towards him, but now I do. The feeling of having wasted two years of my life washes over me, 6 months should have been just that, 6months and then I carry on with my life, now here I am. 2 years down the line, crying over someone who has not even given me the time of day, gosh I feel stupid now.
The anger I feel now fills me with some sort of confidence, confidence in hurriedly taking out the papers and signing them without even giving time to read them. The minute I sign the lines, my heart though feeling heavy, the anger dissipates but relief washes over me.
I believe it is the relief in knowing I really did it and even if the road ahead might be long and hurtful, in knowing what I'd longed for , for years will come to an end once he signs it.
I will no longer be a wife but a single and free woman.
Placing the papers back in the envelope, I carry on with what I was doing, putting lotion on and dressing up for bed, though I doubt I'll manage to sleep tonight.
A sigh takes over as I make way out of my room and down the stairs, upon waiting for Keith because I'm pretty sure he's tied up at work or he's with - ..
I don't even want to finish the sentence or thought.
My hunger jolts awake and soon I hear the grumbling of my stomach. Gosh, I last ate in the morning, that's why. I change route and go to the kitchen, where there's a note from Sarah, informing me about our dinner in the microwave.
Placing the documents on the counter, I warm up my food and soon I'm devouring my food, just taking in the last of the silence which the mansion would provide every night, I waited up for Keith.
I'm halfway into my dinner when I hear footsteps in the house. Keith's back already? Well that's early, it's only 7:30.
The appearance of Keith through the doorway pulls me out of my thoughts, my eyes trail up his frame to his face, where he's already looking at me, standing and not moving.
I notice that he's still in the same clothes from morning, nothing is amiss. Woah...was he here the whole time?
" yes I was." He says.
' oh gosh I said that out loud , didn't I?'
" yes you did." He responds, clearly to my thinking out loud.
' okay I need to stop' I mentally scold myself.
'" please don't, it's quite entertaining." Or not.
I blush in embarrassment, looking away to gather myself when I hear moving about. Looking at him again, I see him take out a glass and pouring himself water." Foods in the microwave. I can heat it up for you."
I might have been upset and a bit angry, doesn't mean I won't attend to him now.
" no, you sit and I'll do it" I nod, looking down at my food so as to continue, but I find that I've instantly lost my appetite.
He soon joins me, sitting at my right. Just when his eyes move from my unfinished food to me, I rise to my feet and throw away the remains, washing up my plate gives me reason to avoid him for even a minute or so.
" You signed." The statement pulls me out of my thoughts and I glance over my shoulder at him.
" What?"
" The papers, you signed them."
" Yes I did," I nod , turning back and continuing with what I was doing.
Once finished, I wipe my wet hands and walk over to the fridge, pouring myself a glass of milk and taking a few Oreo biscuits to add to the deliciousness. The whole time I could feel his eyes on me, till I sit back down in my place, ignoring him. Which is hard to do, I must say.
" You didn't go through them did you?" He questions, pausing my mid chew.
I look at him." No I didn't."
" Why not?" Why is he interested, he should just be happy that I didn't drag anything.
" I've done my part, all it needs now is for you to sign and it is done." I say, rising to my feet, taking my glass of milk and plate of Oreos with me.
" Akiandra..." I stop mid step. My back to him.
" You never answered my question." I feel my eyes moisten but I hold the tears back, taking a much needed breath and putting on a fake smile, before glancing over my shoulders.
"I trust you" I shrug before walking off and out of the kitchen, my shoulders slumping in defeat, feet drag me back to my room, with the first tear coming out and decorating my cheek.