" Come on, you have to do it sometime today." I say, palm against my cheek.
" Urgh I can't." He throws his hand up in defeat, slumping against his chair and glaring at the piece of vanilla cake in front of him.
I bet he wasn't exaggerating when he said, it makes him uncomfortable and takes him back to that time.
" You know you'll never conquer your fears if you don't try," I say.
" It's just staring at me." He shudders." You know what, I've got this." He suddenly perks up, taking the small plate in hand.
I sit up straight, hoping that he's about to take at least a bite, only for him to change direction and throw the cake away.
" What are you doing?" I ask in disbelief.
" I couldn't do it, it had to go." He says, sighing in relief.
"O.kay, would you like chocolate cake then?" I pull out the piece of gooey chocolate cake out of the fridge, placing it on the table.
" Now you're talking, " he mumbles, grabbing the plate and a teaspoon before devouring it.
" Thank you would be nice." I mumble.
" Thank you." He says with the cake in his mouth, his words now sounding funny.
I roll my eyes at him, while cutting myself a big piece.
So I woke up with nothing to do and not wanting to be bored, I decided to bake myself a chocolate cake. I might have overdone it on the cream because I love anything sweet.
I invited London over since we both share the crazy love for cake and he was the only available person. James had a meeting with someone while Theresa has classes, London on the other hand has a day off and what way to spend it, then keep me company.
" Damn Kea, this is really good, you should open up a bakery. "
" Thanks but no, I'd rather do this on my spare time. " I say.
"Mhm," he nods, carrying on eating.
I switch on the TV and right then, the celebrity entertainment news comes on.
Nothing of the ordinary shows, besides a cheating scandal, a bar fight, a couple's argument and the worst and best dressed in a music award show.
I release a breath, one I didn't know I was holding when the highlights were shown.
I thought I'd see him again with her , roaming around the streets, in a mall, hotel, something but no. Nothing concerning him showed and I can't help but be relieved. It's been a few days since I left and as calm and content I was the first day after, the days following were all about him. I spent 80 percent just thinking about him and thank God today was different.
London came by and for a while my attention and thoughts were diverted elsewhere, now I'm not so sure. With how relieved I am to just not see him on TV, with her. I'm a fool for love. Really, ridiculous.
" You were holding on to your breath, hoping to not see or hear anything about him right? " London asks.
How does he do that? Say exactly what's in my mind.
I look away, not able to admit it.
" You know what I think?" I look at him again.
" I think you'll be truly free once your divorce has been finalised." My eyes can't look away, taking in his words and digesting them.
Maybe he's right, maybe once everything has been finalised and I walk out of that courtroom as a single woman, my heart will be convinced to let go, start living and I won't have to look back at all things Keith.
******
I'm alone again and I can't sleep. I'm so used to waiting up for Keith. It's obvious I miss him yet his horrible words, keep replaying in mind, throwing me back into the same pattern of losing myself in Keith's world. He's consumed me and made a big place for himself in my heart.
Ugh , why can't he just leave me be? Oh I know, I've given him reign over my every being.
He's everything perfect in my dreams, well my fantasies but realistically, he is the opposite. Why can't any of my fantasies come to light, where he's showing me a sense of vulnerability, being sweet, caring and heart?
Or walk through that door and be my knight. Okay, I sound ridiculous.
" That'll never happen." I snort at my dumb thoughts.
I hear a knock on the door. Who could that be?
I rise to my feet and walk over to open the door, my jaw dropping to the floor in the process." Keith?"
" Hello Akiandra, may I come in?" What is he doing here?
Why is he looking so hot? With his ' I just woke up' bed haired, dark jeans with a cream white sweater. So casual and un Keith like.
"I don't think that's such a good idea." I say, avoiding his eyes.
" Please." My head snaps up at that, eyes widening a bit.
"Uh okay." I step aside, opening the door wider for him to enter.
Once he's in, I close the door and take a much needed breath, preparing myself for just about anything. I hope I didn't just make a mistake.
I slowly turn around to face him, remaining glued against the door.
A tense moment of silence passes with us sneaking occasional glances at each other, before moving our eyes else where.
Say something. I tell myself.
" Would you like anything to drink. Tea, coffee, water?"
" No I'm fine thank you." I nod, moving my eyes around, feeling awkward.
"Would you like to sit down?" I ask.
" No I'm alright." I nod.
" Well I'm pretty tired, so I'll sit." I push off the door and walk past him, feeling him follow me to the living room.
Settling down on the couch, I switch off the TV and give him my undivided attention.
" So why are you here Keith?" I finally ask, not being able to handle this awkward silence anymore.
" I want to talk, and by talk I mean me, all you have to do is listen."
I nod my head slowly, frowning at him.
I watch him take out something from his back pocket, gasping when he shows me. It's my wedding ring.
I open my mouth to speak but he shoots me a warning look, so I close my mouth. His eyes focus on the ring with his fingers playing with it.
He reaches again to his back pocket, pulling out his own wedding band that he'd long last worn. What is he up to?
"These, " he holds up the rings. "Are symbols of our two year marriage, an in those years up until now, I've never done this." He gets down on his knees.
" Keith?!" I gasp, attempting to get off the couch but again I'm warned to stay put.
"I'm sorry." He says, eyes cast on the floor.
Wait, what did he just say?
My heart skips a beat for a second.
He raises his head to look me in the eyes." I'm sorry." He repeats.
I blink back threatening tears, still in disbelief of what's happening right now.
" Akiandra I treated you unfairly, made you feel small and unworthy when you are above that. What I said to you at the park and that night at the house, those are words a husband should never utter to his wife. Never."
A tear slips from my eyes and there after, more follow.
"And I deserved that slap you gave me and more." I shake my head in protest.
" No you did the right thing. I deserved it and I accept it. Akiandra I've not been the best husband, we both know that. But even then you treated me far better then most, without wanting anything in return. I'm bad at this." He mumbles the last part, degrading himself.
" No you're doing great, keep going." I quickly say, not wanting him to stop now.
He chuckles at that and I blush, looking everywhere but him." Please look at me." I do.
" I should have never been so cruel and mean to you, especially you. Not you. You are one of a kind Akiandra, a special kind. A rare gem and hopefully my friend."
He wants me to be his friend?
He places the rings on the coffee table, looking at them." These I want aside, " he looks back at me.
" We are married yes, but I want us to put everything aside, block out the fact that we are and let's focus on the two people who are present. Us." He releases a breath before continuing.
" I'm here as Keith Salvatore, down on my knees before you, asking you Akiandra Thompson Salvatore, for your forgiveness and your friendship. " He says.
With my tear stained face and jumping heart, I slowly get off the couch and onto my knees, right in front of him.
" Don't you ever do to me, what you did back there, " I say, sniffling and pointing at his chest.
I probably look like a mess right now.
" Never." He shakes his head.
" Good, cause next time I'll punch you so hard, you'll lose all your teeth." I threaten.
" Does this mean I'm forgiven? " I nod. " I need to hear you say it." He breathes out.
" Yes I forgive you and I'll be your friend, in fact I'll be your best friend." I declare, wiping away my tears.
Shy smiles we send to each other and my heart is literally singing right now.
" Uh is it okay if I hug you?" I ask shyly.
"Yes." I don't have to be told twice when I launch myself to him, taking him by surprise.
He chuckles, wrapping his arms around me, having me tense up for a second before relaxing into his arms.
" It is more then okay."