Chapter 91 An Emotional Promise
Helena left but Arabella was uncertain. She demanded to leave William but when Helena actually suggested- She didn’t want to.
Maybe she was never strong enough to leave him. Not now, not before, nor will ever be.
She made so many attempts, tried to run, acted rebellious, made harsh comments to turn her heart stone-cold.
All futile.
But, in a secret, darkest corner of her heart, this question lingered.
‘Do you truly want to leave him, Arabella? Him? The one you always want? The one you choose over all?’
Thinking dejectedly, she was combing her hair when William entered, placing her tea on the table, acting affectionate.
“Here is your tea and I have folded all the laundry. I couldn’t find your black sweatshirt- Bella? Are you listening?”
Strangled by her own feelings, her gaze lowered, hands losing strength as the brush fell from her hand.
“Bella?” William called, holding her shoulder.
“Huh? What?”
“What happened? Where are you lost?” Stopping right before her, he shifted to his knees, gaze softened, “Are you still angry with me?”
“I am not angry, William, I am…” She paused, gripping her dress distressfully.
“You are…?”
“I am just disappointed,”
Sighing, her vision blurred with moistness.
“Disappointed that after proclaiming I am your most precious possession, you hurt me.”
Slowly placing her hand over his, their eyes met intensely that made William serious, listening to her complaint carefully.
“I am disappointed that there is nothing about me that you cherish,”
Holding her one hand with both hands, he kissed them desperately to display his veneration.
“Don’t say that, I cherish everything about you,”
“No you don’t, you don’t,”
Pulling back with quivering lips, wiping the lips he kissed forcefully, the way he possessed her, everything pierced her heart.
All her dreams began to shatter and impotent to carry the weight anymore, she ended up emitting a sob.
“You said I never noticed but it’s ‘you’ who never noticed. It’s you who neglected me always,”
For once, she wanted him to hear her properly and understand her miserable condition.
She had nowhere to go. William was all she had left.
“How can you say this? I was there when you needed support, whenever you were in trouble. I was always there still you went to Luke,”
Gripping her elbows rigidly, an unknown sting abruptly shook the unbreakable man.
One piercing complaint all it took to quaver his core as he growled.
“You were so desperate for love that you ignored mine and chose my brother over me. YOU never loved ME. You abandoned me,”
“If that’s the case….”
Upon finding his hopelessness, Arabella did what she considered right.
She pushed him to the ground and sat on top of him, digging her nail into his skin.
“Accept me now, William. What is stopping you?”
“What…?”
Grabbing his shirt, she pressed him harder into the cold floor, tears spilling uncontrollably from her eyes, sharing her heartbreak this time.
“ACCEPT ME, DAMMIT, LOVE ME!”
Holding her wrist, he yelled back, voice cracking, “I can’t! I am no longer capable of loving anyone anymore!”
Lowering her head with absolutely anguish, her ache grew immeasurable. Suffocated by her own feelings. Her soul was consumed by silence for a few seconds.
William thought she would relax but instead, an unforeseen cry left her lips.
“Why…?”
Incapable of controlling, Arabella broke into a deafening sobbing as all her life where he was never hers flashed and it hollowed her.
“WHY!?” Screaming wretchedly, Arabella rested her head on his shoulder, clasping her fingers helpless around him to not let him go.
Staggered at the cries, William shook her slightly, “Bella…?”
She was screaming, crying, cursing her fate. Sobbing from the bottom of her lungs, tears endlessly spilling that panicked the man.
He… didn’t mean to lead her to this point. He failed to understand- Why.
Though she wasn’t questioning William but her destiny.
‘Why did you give him to me when he can no longer love me?’
‘Why be together when he couldn’t be mine?’
‘Why give her the title of wife when she won’t be regarded as one?’
“WHY, WILLIAM!?” Yelling agonizingly, her wailing penetrated through William’s soul.
Breathless, agitated at her devastated condition, he quickly helped them to sit up and embraced her firmly.
“Bella! Hey! Arabella! Control yourself!”
Holding his wrists, she pressed him harder into her, sobbing violently, pleading with him to spare some mercy to her crazy in love heart.
“Don’t do this to me, William! Please! Don’t! I will die!”
Locking his large, warm hand on her cheek, he panicked, “Hey! What the fuck are you saying? I won’t let it happen!”
Tears began to form a screen in William’s eyes too, panting heavily at her grievous condition, uncertain what to do to eradicate this sting.
“Please, William! Please! Please!”
Hugging her tightly, the lump in his throat suffocated him as an unwanted sobbing liberated from his lips too.
“I am sorry, Bella! I am sorry, please!”
Turning his lock rigid, his lips pressed against her ear. Their heavy breaths collided as her mental breakdown due to her endless heartbreak turned her wild.
Her cries were frightening his soul.
The darkened layer of his heart was peeled off. Trembling in dread ferociously, William ended up crying as well.
“Snap out of it… I promise I will be good… I promise I won’t hurt you… Please, Please, Please,” He begged, rubbing her back.
His fingers caressing her like she is his porcelain doll and too much force would shatter her. Her cries muffled in his chest, shutting her eyes.
“Don’t do this to me, please, I am begging you, I won’t be able to endure it… I will die,” She whimpered weakly, declining to part her skin from him.
She prayed that one day her feelings would reach him.
That one day he understands her madness.
She was with him not because she was love deprived, but he was all she ever wanted.
“Hey, hey, stop saying ridiculous things. Nothing is going to happen to you nor will I let it,”
Murmuring in his gentlest tone, he held her fretfully, fearing if he released her, she would scatter- She would.
Shutting his eyes, his tears coated her skin too, kissing her neck, begging her, “Trust my heart, I mean no harm, I never did, never will.”
Sniffling to regain her lost senses, she lifted her red, puffy eyes, “How?”
Forcing a broken smile, he placed her hand over his heart, resting his forehead against hers senselessly.
“This heart is still William’s, the one you knew, the one I am now, the one who will desire you and only you still the end of his breaths.”
William kept her encased in his arm, stroking her body with his purest endearment, kissing her forehead, pouring all his efforts to soothe her.
“Trust the William who breathes with your existence, Arabella,”
Her lips parted to speak but drained of energy, exhausted of the agonizing events of their lives, she merely rested all her weight on him until she passed out.
But, Tonight confirmed one thing for Arabella, somewhere, in a buried corner of his heart- Her William was still alive.