Chapter thirty one

Chapter thirty one


Heather

TABBY: Has anyone been able to reach Lisa?

HEATHER: No. @JJang @dallas_valencia?

JENNA: Haven't been able to contact her for a week now.
JENNA: I have a promotional shoot in Korea at the end of the week. I was going to drop by her house.

TABBY: Yes, please. I've called her multiple times for the past three days but she didn't answer or call back. I have a bad feeling.

A heavy lump wedged in my throat as I read Tabitha's text message. Lisa practically lives on her devices. There was no way she would ignore the group text messages for a week. Something was wrong.

HEATHER: I'm sure everything is fine. We'll keep calling her. Should we call her husband to find out what's wrong?

DALLAS: Just got off the phone with Dae-ho. He said she fell down the stairs and has a mild concussion. She's trying to limit her screen time. Her phone broke during the fall.

TABBY: Can we speak to her with his phone? I'm really worried.

JENNA: It's really late in Korea now. She's probably resting. We'll talk to her in the morning.

DALLAS: She's going to be fine. Dae said she's getting better and that we shouldn't worry.

HEATHER: That would be much easier to believe if we could actually see or talk to her.

I sat on the couch, my legs crossed, and sipped the fruit smoothie I just made. I'd slept over at Ethan's apartment last night only to wake up next to an empty bed. No notes, no reason to say why he'd left early. But I didn't need him to.

I had jumped on him yesterday like a lovesick idiot, and naturally, he had bailed the first chance he got. I wish I could blame it on the alcohol, but I wasn't even drunk in the slightest when I kissed him. It had all been sober, stupid me.

I had quickly packed my dirty, vomit stinky dress with every intention to leave his apartment before he came back. I had no idea where I'd go with no money and no phone, I just had to get away.

But fortunately, his doorbell had rang at that exact moment. The man at the door was the bartender who had found my purse. And he'd returned it with everything inside.

Maybe the universe didn't entirely hate me after all.

I made sure to give the bartender a huge tip and thanked him profusely. He'd thought I was been dramatic over a mere purse – he didn't say it, but I saw it in his eyes – if only he knew he'd just saved the rest of my dignity.

I had locked myself in my apartment after that and made a nice glass of smoothie and chatted with my friends.

I wasn't ready for the conversation that would come after our…hookup, and judging by the way he disappeared before I woke up, I was sure he wasn't either. Maybe it was for the best if we kept avoiding each other.

God, why was the day after taking a bad decision always worst?

But of course, I didn't get any response from the universe. I guess we were both still new to this whole frenemy thing. But since it'd save me, I made a promise that I was officially breaking up with alcohol. For good this time.

Nothing was going to make me go back. Not even the soft whispers of a new addiction.

My brain was immediately flooded with memories of last night, the feel of Ethan's hands on me, the way he kissed me, the…everything. I was sure I wouldn't be forgetting any of it soon.

It was bad enough that I had stayed celibate for so long, but to be introduced back to sex by my ex-boyfriend and neighbor, that was another level of complication.

I suddenly wasn't looking forward to the next time I'd see him. But I didn't want to sit in my apartment by myself, my thoughts consumed with him. I needed to do something. The only thing I did when I was stressed. Cook.

I stood up from the couch and headed for my bedroom. Fifteen minutes later, I was inside the elevator, heading for the lobby. I needed to get some groceries at the store. I didn't know what I was going to cook yet, but it was nice to get out of the apartment.

I was suddenly reminded of what transpired few hours ago when I had wanted to ‘get out of my apartment’.

Argh! Just fucking kill me already.

I decided to walk to the store instead of taking my car. Fresh air and all that.

The walk to the store was annoyingly long. I was bored and noticed every single thing I had no business noticing.

Like the couple making out by their car on the streets. It's a fucking hot Saturday for fuck's sake.

I tried not to scoff at them. They weren't responsible for my misery. There was no reason for me to be annoyed because of their happiness.

After what felt like forever but in reality was only ten minutes, I got to the store. I moved about the aisles, aimlessly picking up raw food and dropping them in my basket.

When I got to the medicine section, a single thought crossed my mind. Ethan and I had unprotected sex last night and he'd come inside me. I did a mental calculation of when my ovulation was, and of course, it was now.

I wasn't on birth control. There was no use when I didn't have sex regularly, and never had unprotected sex. Until last night.

I ighed and began looking for the plan B. I imagine he wouldn't be too happy if he got tied down after what was just supposed to be a one time.

My heart squeezed in my chest. That was what this was. A one-time thing. I found a plan B and reached for it when something tugged my dress.

I looked down to see the something was actually a little girl looking at me with wide cute eyes. She was holding a doll in one hand and tugging my dress with the other.

“I want.” She muttered.

I blinked in surprise and stared at the medicine I was reaching for. “What?” I blurted.

“Candy. I want the candy.” she said and continued pointing to it.

I quickly scanned the place for any adult who might be her parents but found none.

“This isn't candy. It's…” I paused.

How the hell was I supposed to explain this to a girl that couldn't be more than five years?

She stared at me expectantly. I sighed.
“You know that gross medicine your mum gives you when you're sick? The one that taste so bad you want to throw up?”

She scrunched her nose but nodded, not too eagerly.

“That's what this is. It tastes really gross.” I said.

“Why are you taking it? Are you sick?” She asked innocently.

If only she knew. I crouched down to her level and smiled.

“Yes, and that's why I'm taking the medicine.”

She moved closer to me and put her tiny hand in my hair, patting my head gently. My smile grew wider.

“Mommy says sorry when I'm sick and do this.” she said.

I didn't know why but a deep ache filled my chest as the little girl kept messing with my hair. She making it worse rather than better but I didn't stop her.

“What's your name, sweetie?”

“Ella.” she replied.

“You have a beautiful name, Ella. Where's your Mommy?”

Her eyes darted around as if she just realized she wasn't with her mom. She pointed down the empty aisle, indicating her mom was just there. Her eyes widened and I realized she was about to cry.

I cupped her cheeks gently.
“Don't worry, Ella. We're going to find your mum. She probably went to get you chocolate.”

She nodded and blinked back the tears. I grabbed the plan B and shoved it in my basket quickly. Then I took her hand and headed for the counter.

The twenty-something cashier glanced at me and popped her bubble gum. She began taking out what I bought. Her eyes narrowed on me as she took the plan B and then stared at the girl, clinging to my arm.

“She's not mine. I'm actually looking for her mother. She got lost.”

I didn't know why I was explaining myself to this husgy cashier, but I couldn't take back my words now.

She simply popped her gum again and reached for the intercom. But before she could announce anything, a woman squealed from a distance. Ella left my hand and ran to her.

“Oh my God! You got me so worried. I'm so sorry for leaving you, honey.” the woman said as she showered her daughter with kisses.

Ella hugged her mum with her tiny hands. I realized too late that I was staring at them, that ache seeming to grow deeper. The woman lifted her eyes to me.

“Thank you for finding her for me.” she said.

“No problem.”

They left soon after that. I took my shopping and paid. As I walked back to my apartment, my mind went back to the contraceptives I had just purchased. And for a split second, I contemplated not using it. Just…because.

I was so deep in thoughts that I didn't see it until it was too late. The sound, the too familiar eyes behind the wheels, my whole flashed before my eyes as a car sped towards me.