Chapter seventeen
Chapter seventeen
Heather
The apartment gods hated me.
I'd managed to avoid Ethan ever since the awkward run-in with him and a girl in the hallway the other day. I convinced myself it was because I didn't want too much familiarity between us, but honestly, I just didn't know how to face him. And a little bit because I was upset.
I had no right to be upset. I knew what I was signing up for when I walked away eight years ago. I wanted to him to fall in love again and be happy. I just never thought I would witnessed that happiness in such close range. And damn, does it fucking hurt.
You'd think the universe was done with me after that day, but no. Ethan had to step out of his apartment the same time as me.
I cursed under my breath. One week of avoiding him. One week of waiting till he leaves before I stepped out, or rushing back home before he came back, it had to end today.
Maybe I should just go back inside. I was going grocery shopping, but I could postpone it. It's not like I couldn't survive without food for a few hours. Right?
But it was too late anyway. He already saw me. Going back would prove I had been avoiding him. And I wasn't going to let him realize that.
Ethan flashed me a smile and turned towards me. We were waiting for the elevator to arrive.
“Hello, neighbor. How was your night?” he said a bit too cheerful.
I sucked in a sharp breath and debated whether to answer him or just ignore him. Maybe I should have just gone back inside and waited till he left.
“Fine.” I bit out.
The image of him and the girl flashed through my mind again. I hated that it was now permanently pasted in my brain. How they stood so close, his hands on her waist, the way she stared at him like her was her fucking savior.
Fuck them.
I pushed back the anger slowly brewing in me. I wasn't going to let him realize how much that day had bothered me. How I had questioned myself several times that night if I had made the right decision by walking away. How a small part of me has wished I was the one he held. How I just –
I cut my trail of thoughts. It wouldn't do me any good worrying about it anyway. I had other things to worry about. The renovation of the restaurant. The people after my friends because of me. And well, other important things that weren't about a certain dirty blond man.
But of course, he wouldn't let me rest.
“I had a great night too.” he said.
“I don't want hear about it.” I blurted out before I could stop myself.
Way to go, Heather. So much for not showing him how much his relationship affected me. The smirk on his face was enough evidence that he knew.
“I think you very much need to hear about it. The weather was amazing. So calm and relaxing. It's really nice up here, isn't it? We have easy access to the roof. Have you been there? It's quite nice actually. You should check it out.” he said.
Thankfully, the elevator arrived then. I quickly stepped inside. I groaned inwardly when he stepped in after me.
“So the roof?” he started.
“No.”
“Oh, that's not good. Have you gone on a tour of the complex yet?” he asked.
I sighed. I could choose to ignore him but we still had three minutes before we got to the ground floor.
“No.” I said again.
“Well, you should. There are so many cool places you need to see. The pool. The gum. The lounge area. Maybe I should take you on a tour sometime.”
“No, thank you.” Two more minutes. Fuck, it felt like eternity.
“Why? You just moved in. You're supposed to familiarize yourself with your environment.”
I've had enough of him. Couldn't he tell I was mad at him?
“Why are you so chatty? What do you want?” I snapped.
His eyes glistened with amusement, his lips hooked in a smirk.
“Look who can speak more than three words.”
“You were annoying me.” I seethed.
“You love it when I annoy you.” he smirked.
I blinked, his words taking me by surprise. My cheeks flushed red instantly.
“I…you…Argh!” I groaned. He laughed, the sound causing my heart to skip. I schooled my face and pretended to be annoyed.
“Stop flirting with me.” I scoffed.
God, why was the elevator so slow today? Why does it chose now of all times to be so fucking slow? I should have just taken the stairs. Sure, I'd probably not be able to feel my legs after climbing down fifteen floors, but at least I wouldn't be stuck in this tiny space with him.
“I'm not flirting. I was simply making conversation. Why would you assume that?” he blinked, looking as innocent as a newborn.
I wanted to smile but it wouldn't really help my case.
“Well, stop making conversation.”
“I’m sorry, I can't do that. We're neighbors and friends, friends chat.” he shrugged.
“I'm not your friend.” I snapped a little too harshly. I was tired of that title. I hated how much the friend zone bothered me. Not like I was ever going to tell him that.
“You said differently at the club the other day.” he pointed out.
“I was drunk. I said a lot of things that day.” I shrugged.
He sighed. “Yeah, I heard.”
I turned swiftly towards him. “Heard what?”
“The restaurant. News travel fast in the vortex, Millie.”
For sine reasons, I didn't feel the need to correct him for the name. Maybe because something else he said had caught my curiosity.
“The what now?” I asked.
“The vortex.” he said. I stared at him blankly.
“Seriously? You don't know what the vortex is? Does anybody even pay attention when I talk?” He groaned and rolled his eyes.
“I've literally never heard you say that before.”
“I say it every time, damnit!” he groaned. “That's the name of our group. The five of you and three of us. I named us at Dallas and Oliver's engagement lady year. Why does no one listen to me?” he scoffed, looking genuinely offended.
I couldn't refrain the laughter fast. His facial expression was so funny. When I started, it took a while to stop.
When I finally got a grip of myself, Ethan was staring at me, the corner of his lips hooked up in a soft smile.
“Why are you staring at me like that?” I asked.
“I've missed that.” He said suddenly.
The temperature in the elevator seems to drop, the air between us heated. I was suddenly very away of our proximity.
I should have kept quiet and turned the other way, but I couldn't help myself.
“What?” I asked in an almost whisper.
“Your laugh.” he said.
My breath caught. I stared at him, lips slightly parted. I didn't know who moved, just that now, we were just inches away from each other. I couldn't look away from him. I knew I had to, I knew what was on the line, but there was nothing I wanted more than this. I wanted him. I've always wanted him, and I always will.
It didn't matter how many years ago our relationship was. He was the first person who had ever made me feel alive, he made me feel I wasn't just an object to be ordered around, he made me feel…human.
His eyes searched mine, seeking approval. I didn't speak, didn't do anything except stare into his eyes. His hand caressed my hair. I sighed at how comforting it was. I'd missed it.
“God, I fucking miss you, Millie.” He breathed, his voice shaky as he spoke.
He cupped my cheeks gently, his thumb grazing my lower lip. I released a breath, my back arching towards him. I closed my eyes, expecting the touch of his lips on mine. Our noses grazed. I could feel the gentle caress of his breath on my face. But the kiss never came.
Instead, his breathing became frantic. Like he was holding himself back, or something was holding him back. I opened my eyes to see what was wrong.
His eyes was squeezed shut like he was in pain. He pulled away from me instantly and turned his face away. He punched a key in the control and the elevator doors slid open. That's when I realized we'd been on the ground floor for a while now.
“Ethan, what–?”
“Get out.” he cut in. His head was hung low, his face turned away from me.
“What happened? Are you okay?” I stepped towards him, my voice laced with concern.
I didn't understand what just happened. I grabbed his arm to make him face me but he shrugged me off.
“Get out!” He screamed and shoved me out of the elevator.
I stared in shock wondering what just happened. I didn't get a chance to ask before the elevator doors slid shut again.