Chapter 30 The Relapse
Marcus stood in the master bedroom staring at his own reflection in the mirror, fists clenched so tightly the knuckles had turned white. Three days had passed since Elena insisted on starting medication next month, and the weight of it all had finally become too much. He had promised himself this morning that today would be different. No more lies. No more sneaking. He would be the husband Elena deserved and put an end to the madness with Lucy.
He repeated the vow under his breath like a mantra while Elena got ready for a full day of wedding vendor meetings. When she kissed him goodbye at the door, her eyes full of quiet hope for their future family, something inside him fractured. The moment her car disappeared down the street, the resolve he had built crumbled into dust.
He lasted exactly forty-seven minutes.
The house felt too quiet, too full of Elena’s presence. Every corner reminded him of her gentle smile, her tears after the negative tests, and the way she looked at him with complete trust. Marcus paced the living room like a caged animal, trying to fight the rising heat in his blood. He told himself he could resist. He told himself he was stronger than this addiction.
But his body remembered Lucy’s tight heat, the way she moaned his name, the filthy way she begged for him right after he had been inside his wife. His cock hardened painfully against his jeans at the mere thought.
He lasted another ten minutes before he gave up the fight.
He walked straight to Lucy’s room and pushed the door open without knocking. She was sitting on her bed scrolling through her phone, wearing nothing but an oversized t-shirt that barely covered her thighs. She looked up, and the moment their eyes met, she knew.
Marcus crossed the room in three strides and pulled her to her feet. There were no words this time, only raw need. He yanked the t-shirt over her head, spun her around, and bent her over the edge of the bed. His hands shook as he freed himself from his jeans and thrust into her in one brutal motion.
Lucy cried out sharply, gripping the sheets as he filled her completely. Marcus fucked her with savage intensity, hips slamming forward so hard the bedframe banged against the wall. This was not the careful lovemaking he gave Elena. This was pure, uncontrolled relapse.
“God damn you,” he growled through gritted teeth, one hand fisting her hair while the other gripped her hip hard enough to leave marks. “I tried to stop. I really fucking tried.”
Lucy pushed back against him, taking every violent thrust. “Then stop lying to yourself,” she gasped. “You don’t want to stop. You never did.”
He took her harder, the wet sounds of their bodies echoing through the room. The marital bed where he had tried to get Elena pregnant was only steps away down the hall, yet here he was, buried deep inside her daughter in broad daylight while Elena was out finalizing their future together.
The orgasm hit Marcus like a freight train. He buried himself to the hilt and came with a guttural groan, flooding Lucy with thick, hot pulses of release. The pleasure was so intense it bordered on pain. For a few blissful seconds the guilt disappeared, replaced by pure, blinding ecstasy.
Then reality crashed back in.
He pulled out slowly, watching his cum drip down Lucy’s thighs onto the carpet. The sight should have disgusted him. Instead it sent another unwanted jolt of arousal through his body. He staggered back a step, running both hands through his hair as shame flooded him.
“What the hell am I doing?” he whispered, voice cracking. “She’s out there planning our life, crying over negative tests, and I’m in here fucking you on the day I swore I would stop.”
Lucy turned to face him, flushed and breathing hard. “Because you can’t stop. Because deep down you don’t want a normal life with her. You want this. You want me.”
Marcus shook his head, but the denial felt hollow. The core struggle had reached a fever pitch. He loved Elena. He wanted to give her the baby she desperately craved. Yet every attempt to walk away from Lucy only dragged him back harder, deeper, more addicted than before. He was no longer in control. The relapse had been spectacular, and it had happened right on the marital bed while Elena was away.
Marcus cleaned himself up and tried to act normal for the rest of the afternoon. When Elena returned home that evening, she found him in the kitchen making dinner. She smiled tiredly and wrapped her arms around him from behind.
“You’re such a good man,” she murmured against his back. “I don’t know what I’d do without you.”
Her words should have warmed him. Instead they landed like ice. Because while she held him, he could still smell Lucy on his skin. While she kissed his neck, he could still feel the way Lucy’s body had clenched around him hours earlier.
Elena pulled back slightly, studying his face with a small frown. “You seem distracted again. Is everything okay? You’ve been so distant lately. Like your mind is somewhere else even when you’re right here with me.”
Marcus forced a smile and kissed her forehead, but the lie sat heavy on his tongue. Elena was beginning to sense that something was deeply wrong. She could not yet name it, but the cracks in his carefully constructed facade were starting to show.
The relapse had been complete. And now Elena was beginning to notice the shadow that had fallen over their marriage.