Ch158 Cracked

Now Sasa’s nights were filled with stealing food from the wolves in turn for Leo as she tried to keep him alive. Countless more nights marked only by her son thinning. One night she accidently killed a wolf prisoner who wouldn’t share his food and she ate him. Leo looked at her with worry, but she vowed he was in no danger. She tried to convince herself of that in her head. Some nights passed with her unable to move as she just stared at Leo. Those nights really made him uncomfortable. After the third time she did it, she tracked down Drakon.

“How close to the moon?” Sasa asked as she tossed Leo at him.

Drakon caught the boy and snarled, “This is the Would-Be-Man’s pup. Are we going to kill it?”

Sasa pulled Leo back away and snarled ferociously at Drakon, “This is my pup. Leo, son of Onisagira, daughter of Sköll. He is no longer safe with me. I was hoping he would be safe with you,”

Drakon huffed and sniffed Leo closer. “He does have your eyes. I will protect the son of my queen, lady Onisagira. However, what guarantee do we have he doesn’t still work for the Would-Be-Man?”

“Look at me and know he didn’t send my son until I fell this far,”

“You look sicker despite the fact you’ve groomed yourself. Are you not strong like Lady Eirwen?”

“I think I broke something when I freed my mate. I am more vampire than wolf now. I haven’t felt the pull of Luna for some time now,” Sasa admitted sadly as she turned to leave.

“Sasa, you’re not leaving me here alone with him, are you?” Leo asked worried.

“I don’t steal his food, and he is loyal to the Ice wolves. You are safe here; it is no longer safe with me. If I don’t eat you tonight, I just may tomorrow or the next. I couldn’t live with myself if I got you back just to kill you myself,” Sasa admitted with tears in her eyes.

Leo walked up and hugged her, “I know you wouldn’t hurt me Sasa,”

Drakon pulled Leo away from Sasa, “Leave it be boy. If she says you aren’t safe around her then you’re not safe. There is only one thing wolves protect fiercer than pups and that’s mates,”

Leo wasn’t happy, but he stayed with the dragon wolf. Sasa came back on nights she felt stronger, but the trips grew further and further apart until she stopped coming altogether. The time spent with the wolf Drakon was used to teach Leo how to fight like a wolf and what he could teach the boy without giving away secrets to the spying master mind behind their torment.

As Sasa sat alone in the dark she passed the time the only way she knew how, she drew by scratching on the wall, sang lightly to herself, or talked with her imaginary mate. So broken with heart ache for him at one point she etched a likeness of him into the wall. She had to find a box to stand on to get his full height. That really didn’t help the talking to herself. Eventually she drew her whole family to chat with. Some nights this worked as she pretended, she was home and safe, others when the pain of hunger was too great, she just balled up at Fenris’s feet and sobbed. She knew it only made things worse, but she couldn’t help it.

“My dearest Onisagira, hush now,” Dagrim’s voice called as Sasa imaged the arms of her father around her.

She sobbed harder as she clung to the arms and could even imagine the scent of her father. He always smelled of stone, a touch of sand and a hint of blood. Only because of her hunger the smell of blood was stronger, like when they hunt together. Oh, how she wished to hunt with her father again. In his old dragon speech, she cried, “Father, I miss you. I want to go home, I want Fenris, I want the puppies, I want everyone to pick at me. I want to see my son again but I fear if I do, I’ll eat him, his human blood drives me crazy,”

“Settle, my precious daughter,” Dagrim’s voice respond back in birth language. “May I ask why you’re using Mamukili?”

“Partly so I do not lose my mind entirely, the other so the man in white can’t readily understand me as he watches. I speak to everyone in the language they taught me. Even if I mess up because I know what I mean so it doesn’t matter,” Sasa admitted as she held on tighter. She must be sleeping, he felt so real in her arms.

“Onisagira, look at me, I am real,” Dagrim said, returning to English, as he lifted her head up to look at him. “Unfortunately, the man in white got away from me, again, but I killed everyone else. You’re free, I’ve come for you, my precious, beloved, Onisagira,”

Sasa opened her eyes and stared at him with disbelief. There was no way her father could have found her. It was a trick, an illusion. More tears fell from her eyes as she buried her face back into his chest, continuing to sob in Mamukili, “I wish it was so, daddy, but I know it’s just a dream. I’ll wake up from the hunger and be all alone again. I’m just glad it’s you this time. I almost wish I didn’t dream when it’s Fenris,”

“Why, what happened to your mate?” Dagrim asked gently as he stroked her head to settle her.

Sasa shook her head, “You know what happened. We had to free him so he didn’t die. He’s safe, that’s all that matters, he’s safe. I used to think we’d get out, but we can’t, not now, not with the puppy to protect,”

“Onisagira, Ragnar and Astrid are at home with Bernard and Idmu. I would never bring your children into danger,” Dagrim stated firmly, confused by what she was saying. He knew she was confused, but even so she should know that.

“No, not those puppies, the other one, the stolen one. We can’t forget about Leo. Drakon is protecting him. The lost puppy we need to keep safe. I can’t fail him again, not ever,” Sasa said almost frantically as she looked up at Dagrim pleadingly. “Promise, you won’t forget again, we can never forget,”

Dagrim held her close as he rubbed her back soothingly, “Hush, little one, hush. I won’t forget. Why not show me this Leo? I won’t let you hurt him,”

Sasa shook her head no. “I can’t. You know we can’t. Last time we barely heard a word he said, all we could hear was the blood. Why was I so stupid? Why did I not think it would damage me because I’m not on the outside?”

“What, what damaged you?” Dagrim asked as he looked her over for injury. There were cuts and tears on the green coat she was wearing, but he could see no physical wounds. Through one tear on her sleeve, he could see an old bit of gauze stained with her blood underneath, but that wound was also whole and old.

“When we freed Fenris. We had to give him our werewolf blood to shield his and drink that vampire to get the power we needed to control his blood. It was too close together, it made us more vampire, but still not complete. That is why we can’t sleep like Lykos, or die like we should,”

“Lykos is here?” Dagrim asked worried.

“Yes, he’s guarded by Namuh. I can’t feel Namuh anymore, I’m too far gone. But I wrote his name on the door, so when daddy comes maybe he’ll find him. I forgot to mark Drakon’s door, daddy can’t find Leo without a mark,” Sasa said as she tried to pull away.

Dagrim kept hold of her arm before she could dash off, “Who is Drakon? Who is Namuh?”

“Let go, I have to wake up. Maybe just one more time, just once, then never again. I have to mark the door, daddy won’t know,” Sasa pleaded as she tugged on her arm.

“My poor child, settle. Before you wonder off, let me give you some blood,” Dagrim said gently as he held out his other hand, wrist up.

Sasa shook her head, “Don’t work, just makes pain worse. No, I must go,”

Dagrim sighed sadly. Sasa still had the ability to talk and move, but he could tell she had broken at some point. He only hoped she hadn’t shattered beyond repair. “Onisagira, you are to bite me and that is an order,”

Sasa froze and looked at her father as her eyes exploded with her hunger. Ignoring his outstretched hand completely Sasa pushed her father over and sank her fangs greedily into his neck. Never in her life had blood tasted so good or felt so warm. It felt like she had never eaten before or lived as her body slowly began restoring and repairing itself. Once her mind started to quicken again and she felt the heat of blood drunkenness Sasa leapt off the body she was drinking from in fear. What if it was Leo she was drinking from, she killed Drakon and now was killing her son. It took a few seconds for her mind to believe her eyes, but she saw Dagrim laid out on the floor, starting to sit himself back up as he commanded his blood the heal the bite Sasa had left. New tears fell from her eyes as she fell back on her father, only this time they were of joy and happiness.