Chapter 113 Chapter 113: The Price of Truth
\[Lilia\]
The memories of what he did to me from the moment I first stepped into this place came rushing back with vivid, agonizing clarity. The paralyzing fear, the burning anger, and the intense animosity I once felt toward him surfaced all at once.
But as time had passed, those feelings had started to dissipate. I thought I saw a silver lining in his dark, beastly life. He had shown me a softer side, a glimpse of something human that gave me hope. I actually started to believe that I could survive the rest of my life in this godforsaken place. I thought I could reconcile my heart with the dangers he posed and open myself to him.
However, those were gambles I miserably lost.
Kael’s face blurred in my vision as words poured out of me endlessly, a dam breaking to release the lamentations that filled me to the brim.
“I started to care for you. I surrendered myself to you because you made a promise. You told me that causing me pain was the last thing you would ever do in this world. But I was a fool to believe that, and now I’m suffering the consequences of giving you a chance after everything you've done.”
I could barely breathe as I finished, the words fading into a ragged gasp. My tears ran continuously, like water from an open well spilling over the sides.
Kael remained motionless, maintaining his perpetually stony expression. I couldn’t read what was going on inside his head or catch even a flicker of emotion in his eyes. I, on the other hand, sobbed like a child abandoned by her parents.
I am still broken. As much as I want to appear alright, there is a void inside me that I cannot fill. No matter how hard I try, I can't find the missing piece. All I want is to be whole again. I was making progress—I could see it—but I knew something inevitable was coming to destroy me once more.
And the harbinger of that destruction was standing right in front of me: the man I hated, yet the man I always longed for.
I can deny it all I want, but at the end of the day, it’s his face that haunts me the moment I close my eyes. I crave to be in his arms, to have him again. But right now, I can’t risk my heart—not while I am still healing. If I must drive Kael away to mend myself, if I must resist him with everything I have, then so be it.
We stood there, staring at each other. I was bawling my eyes out, but to hell with it. I am human, and I am allowed to cry to my heart’s desire, but I will not bend again.
Kael inched a step closer, and I was too worn out to retreat. I held my ground without breaking his gaze. He stopped so close that my chin slightly brushed his chest. He lifted his hand to my face, tipping my head up.
His touch—it was melting me on the inside, but I remained rigid on the outside, clenching my teeth so hard my jaw ached.
“You don’t know how much it cost me, and what I have lost, Kukla,” he murmured softly. His thumb swiped across my tear-streaked face, and for the first time, I saw a genuine flicker of emotion flash in his eyes. “Everything that is happening to us.”
I looked at him with utter befuddlement as the words sank in. Was he talking about money right now? I truly could not believe this man.
I scoffed contemptuously and swiftly flicked his hand away as though his touch burned me to the bone. I backed away from his reach, giving him a sharp glare as the anger inside me boiled over.
“Oh, I’m sure your humongous treasure chest would suffice. I'm sure it's worth more than three times your expenses… Oh, great Russian mob fucking kingpin!” I over-exaggerated the last part, spitting each word venomously and tossing my hands into the air theatrically for emphasis.
Kael suddenly went stiff. His stare hardened, looking as though my words had caught him completely off guard.
“You knew,” he stated, though it sounded like a heavy realization.
“You think I am so daft that I wouldn't find things out?” I huffed, sniggling a remark.
Val had told me more than I was probably supposed to know. Thanks to him, I no longer feel like a lost child grappling to survive in a place packed with hungry wolves. At least now I understand the environment I walked into—not that I would tell Kael any of that. Nor would I tell him about the strange encounter I had with the De Luca.
“You don’t understand,” he trailed off, attempting to cross the space between us again, but I immediately held my hand up, stopping him in his tracks.
“Oh, please,” I sneered, mocking him with a grin. “Have the pleasure of enlightening me. What is it that I do not understand?”
Kael's jaw clenched at my words. He took a sharp breath, closing his eyes as he exhaled loudly. Then he peeled them open, staring at me intensely, as though he were looking directly at my soul.
“There are things that money cannot buy, and that is what it costs—more than anything in the world—to keep you.”
After saying that, Kael turned around and walked out of my room, leaving me standing there with my mouth hanging open, trying to decipher the weight of what he meant.
I was jolted awake the next morning by a succession of loud knocks. Sunlight instantly pierced my vision as I opened my eyes. The sun was already high in the sky, and a quick glance at the desk clock revealed it was nearly the middle of the afternoon. I didn’t even remember falling asleep last night; my mind had been entirely occupied by Kael’s parting words.
My head was still buzzing with grogginess as I slowly pushed myself up. At the same time, another knock sounded, followed by a familiar voice.
“Lilia? Are you awake yet?”
It was Aya, but I wondered why she was knocking.
“Yes,” I responded, a bit puzzled. “You know you don't have to knock...” I groused, shaking my head to chase the sleepiness from my system. I slid off the bed and toddled toward the door, only then realizing why she hadn't just walked in.
My door was locked.
I frowned, pressed the unlock button, and let Aya in. She seemed to have been waiting for a while; I must have slept like a rock.
“Did something happen last night? Your door was locked,” she pointed out, pushing the meal cart into the room.
I rubbed the side of my head, trying to remember if I had indeed locked the door before bed. Everything was a blur after the argument; my body had moved on autopilot while my mind remained blank. However, it seemed Kael’s swift hand had proven useful. He must have locked it when he stormed out of my room.
“No, nothing happened,” I said, following Aya to the lounge. I tried to clear my head as she set my brunch on the table. “I must have locked it without knowing. I was exhausted.”
She busied herself serving the meal, while I unconsciously rubbed my wrist, thinking of how to spend the day since I had no training. I didn't notice the hawkish stare Aya was shooting toward me until I saw the deep scowl on her face.
“I see the wound on your lip is healing nicely,” she began grumpily. She stood in front of me with her hands on her hips, looking as though she were about to castigate a child caught stealing.
“But do care to tell me why you have scratches on your wrists? I was told yesterday that you were at the firing range, practicing with guns. I wasn't informed that targets had claws.”