Chapter 82 Chapter 82

Chapter 82 Chapter 82
Kimberley 

My legs feel like they’re about to give out beneath me, and I weave across the sidewalk like a midday drunk as I walk back toward campus.
I feel wrung out, numb almost, my mind in shock from bouncing so quickly between so many emotional extremes.

How did that happen?

It’s hard to even remember how this day started. Hard to believe that earlier today, I dropped off a resume to a man with greasy hands and ran into Ben outside that pizza joint. It feels like something that happened to another person in another lifetime. Even the original purpose of our break-in at the guys’ house seems fuzzy and unreal right now, as if it was a different Kimberley who helped Gemma crawl through the window into Darren’s room.

I know those things are all real, that they all happened to me, but none of them are as visceral as the feel of Caden that lingers everywhere on my body.
Inside my body.

My clit is so tender it’s almost painful, and even the slight amount of friction generated by walking makes jolts of sensation shoot through me, radiating through my limbs. Caden’s cum is slowly leaking out of me, mingling with my own wetness in my soaked panties.

My muscles are sore and exhausted from tensing and releasing so many times, and I can’t seem to catch my breath.
I have never, ever come like that—so hard and so many times in a row.

It was something beyond pleasure, beyond desire, an onslaught of sensation that’s left me feeling dazed and shaky.

It was fire.

It was pain.

It was need.

It was obsession.

My phone buzzes in my pocket, and I draw it out, half-dreading I’ll see Caden’s name pop up on the screen.

But it’s not him. It’s my partner in crime, the reason I ended up at the Icons’ house today in the first place.

GEMMA: Hey, chica. You okay?

No.

The thought is immediate. Nothing about me is okay right now, but I don’t even know how to articulate what’s wrong. And Gemma doesn’t need to know how broken I am inside.

She’s been helping me more than I deserve, and I worry if I lean on her too heavily, she’ll break just like I have.

So instead of typing out that single-word response, I write a different message.

ME: Yeah. I got out okay. I don’t think he knows you were there. You get anything useful?

GEMMA: Yup. Only got to go through Darren’s stuff though. We’ll have to go back for the other two.

My stomach clenches, and my thumbs fly across the screen as I tap out my response.

ME: No. It’s not worth it. If I go back again, they’ll get too suspicious. We’ll have to find another way.

I can’t go back to that house. I can’t risk running into Caden again, or the other two Icons either, for that matter. I meant what I told him before I left.
Never again.

But that’s the problem. I didn’t mean for it to happen this time. I don’t even think he did either. It’s like our bodies have decided to channel all the hatred between us into sexual chemistry, and the stronger our rage burns, the more insatiable we feel.

Because that’s how I felt with him today. Insatiable. Like I could tear myself apart trying to satisfy my craving for him, and it still wouldn’t be enough.
The rage would still burn.

The hatred would still consume me.
And I would still want him.

GEMMA: Okay, if you’re sure. There are other ways I can get most of what I need. It won’t be easy, and it wouldn’t be quite as much. But if that’s what you want…

ME: It is.

GEMMA: Your call. Where are you?

ME: On my way back. Sorry, I got held up.

GEMMA: No worries. Hurry tho! I’ve got something to show you.

I’m already stepping onto campus as I text her back telling her that I will. But instead of speeding up, my footsteps slow. I run my fingers through my wild hair to tame it, then press my palms to my cheeks, letting the late afternoon air cool the flush I can feel warming my skin.

All I really want is to shower and try to erase the memory of Caden from my skin. Then I can deal with Gemma and whatever she wants to show me. But I don’t want to show back up at the dorm looking freshly fucked.

What happened back at the Icons’ house doesn’t make any sense to me, so I can’t even imagine what it would seem like to an outsider.

I don’t want to try to explain how hate can turn into something else entirely, something just as visceral and violent.

As soon as I get back to the dorm, I mutter an excuse, grab a fresh set of clothes, and duck into the bathroom. Then I crank the faucet handle and let the hot water pour down over me as I wash my hair twice. Caden’s spicy ginger scent fades from my skin as I scrub at it with a fruity body wash, but it’s not enough. I can still feel him everywhere.

And even now, even worn out and exhausted as I am, heat flashes through me at the thought of him.
I turn the shower to ice-cold for a few seconds before I get out, hissing at the sting as freezing sheets of water cascade over me. That doesn’t help either.

But when I step out and wipe the condensation off the mirror, I at least look more put together.
When I step out of the bathroom, Gemma shoots me a curious look, and I shrug as I cross the room to sink down onto my bed.

“It was my first time breaking and entering. I guess I got a little freaked out. I’m not as good at it as you are.”

“I dunno. You did pretty good.” She grins at me. “You saved my butt, so thanks for that.”

“Yeah, of course. You’re only doing this for me. I can’t let you get busted for it.” My stomach twists itself into knots as I add, “But we really can’t go back there. If I get caught again, I don’t know what’ll happen.”

I mean that in so many more ways than she could ever guess, but Gemma doesn’t press me to explain. And to my surprise, she perks up immediately at my words.

“You won’t have to go back,” she says, walking over to me with a flier in her hand. Thankfully, it’s not a picture of Caden naked—I really don’t think I could fucking handle that right now. Instead, it’s an invitation to a holiday party. “They’re posting it all over campus. The party is tomorrow.”

I recognize the address immediately, and the knots in my stomach pull tighter. That’s the house I was just at. The Icons’ place. Why are they having a holiday party? Most likely, they’re just trying to throw shit in my face. If I had any hope that they didn’t know I’m still in Evergreen Bay, that hope is dashed now.