Chapter 80 After the Almost
Luna’s POV
“So… we’re just going to pretend that didn’t happen?” I shouldn’t have said it.
The moment the words left my mouth, I knew it. Because Kai didn’t answer immediately, and somehow, that silence said everything, that we were still standing too close, too aware, and too something.
His hand hadn’t moved far from my face. Like he didn’t fully trust himself to let go. Or like I didn’t.
“Do you want to pretend?” he asked finally.
My breath caught. No. But saying that out loud felt like stepping off a cliff. “I don’t know,” I admitted. Because that was safer. Half-truths usually were. But his gaze didn’t leave mine.
“You always know,” he said quietly.
I let out a small breath. “That’s not true.”
“It is when it matters.” He said.
That hit harder than it should have. Because he wasn’t wrong, and we both knew it.
I looked away first. Not because I wanted to….but because I had to. Because if I didn’t, I might say something reckless, or something real. And I wasn’t sure I was ready for that.
Not after everything.
Not when things could fall apart again just as quickly as they came together.
“This is complicated,” I said, folding my arms slightly, and creating space where there wasn’t any before.
“Everything about us is complicated,” he replied.
I almost smiled. “Not helping,” I said.
“Wasn’t trying to.” He replied.
A beat of silence passed between us. But lighter this time, but still there, and still loaded.
I leaned back against the lockers, exhaling slowly. “I mean it, Kai. This… us… whatever this is….it’s not simple.”
“I didn’t say it was.” He replied.
“You didn’t say anything.” I shot back.
“That’s because I’m waiting for you to decide what you want.” He said.
I blinked. “That’s not fair.”
His eyebrow lifted slightly. “Why not?”
“Because you’re part of this too,” I said.
“I am.” He replied.
“Then say something,” I muttered.
He studied me for a second. Really studied me. Like he was weighing his words carefully.
Then…..“I want you,” he said simply.
My heart skipped with no hesitation, no jokes, and no deflection.
Just… that.
My throat went dry. “Kai….”
“I’m not done,” he added quietly.
I closed my mouth and waited.
“I want you,” he repeated, softer this time. “But not like this.”
My chest tightened. “What does that mean?”
“It means I don’t want it to be because we almost died,” he said. “Or because something tried to take me over and you were the only thing keeping me here.”
“That’s not….”
“It’s part of it,” he cut in gently. “You can’t deny that.”
I couldn’t. Because he was right. That moment….
That kiss….
It came from something intense. Something emotional. Something fragile.
“And what if it’s not just that?” I asked quietly.
His eyes softened slightly. “Then I’m still here.”
That did it. That one sentence. It was simple. But steady.
Not pushing and not demanding. It was just… there.
I swallowed. “You’re really patient, you know that?”
“I have to be,” he said. “You’re stubborn.”
I let out a soft laugh. “Excuse me?”
“Did I stutter?” He asked.
I shook my head slightly, smiling despite myself. “No.”
“Good.” He said, and he paused. But this time….
It wasn’t heavy. It wasn’t suffocating. It felt… alive. Like something was building instead of breaking.
“I don’t regret it,” I said again, more firmly this time.
“I know.” He said.
“But I’m scared,” I added.
That one was harder to say. It sat heavier in my chest and more real. He didn’t hesitate this time.
“Of me?”
“No,” I replied.
“Good,” he said lightly. “That would’ve been awkward.”
I nudged him slightly. “I’m serious.”
“So am I.” He said.
I exhaled. “Of this,” I clarified. “Of… what happens next.”
He nodded slowly. “That’s fair.”
“That’s it?” I asked. “No dramatic speech?”
“Do you want one?” He asked.
“No,” I replied instantly.
“Then no.” He said.
I rolled my eyes slightly. “You’re impossible.”
“And yet,” he said, a faint smirk tugging at his lips, “you kissed me.”
My face warmed. “I did not…”
“You definitely did.” He said.
“I leaned in slightly,” I argued.
“You grabbed my shirt.” He corrected.
“That was….” I paused.
“Very convincing.” He continued.
I groaned softly, covering my face for a second. “Can we not relive that part?”
“Absolutely not,” he said. “That’s my favorite part.”
I dropped my hands and glared at him. “You’re annoying.”
“You like it.” He said with a smirk on his face.
“I tolerate it,” I said.
“Barely.” He replied.
“Exactly,” I said.
He smiled. Not cocky. Not teasing. Just… soft. And that….That did something dangerous to my heart. Because suddenly…. This didn’t feel like chaos. Or survival. Or adrenaline.
It felt like something real. Something that could actually last and that scared me more than anything else. Because losing him once almost broke me. Losing him again? I wasn’t sure I’d survive that.
“You’re thinking too much again,” he said quietly.
I sighed. “I know.”
“Stop.” He said.
“Can’t,” I replied.
“You can.” He assured.
“I don’t want to,” I said.
He tilted his head slightly. “Why?”
“Because if I don’t think about it,” I said softly, “then I might mess it up.”
His expression changed. Just slightly. “Luna…”
“I mean it,” I continued. “What if this ruins everything?”
“What if it doesn’t?” he countered.
“That’s not helpful,” I said.
“It’s realistic.” He said.
I hesitated. Then…. “What if we lose each other?”
His gaze didn’t waver. “Then we deal with it.”
“That’s not a plan,” I said.
“It’s the only one we’ve got.” He replied.
Silence followed and then…..
“Hey,” he said softly.
I looked up.
“You didn’t lose me.” He said.
My chest tightened.
“And I’m not planning to go anywhere.” He added.
Something inside me eased. Just a little. “Okay,” I whispered.
“Okay,” he echoed.
We stood there for a moment. Not touching. Not kissing. Just… there. And somehow….
That felt even more dangerous. Because it meant this wasn’t just a moment. It wasn’t just adrenaline. It wasn’t just survival. It was something slower. It was something deeper. Something that was only just beginning.
“Come on,” he said after a moment, stepping back slightly. “We should probably get to class before people start asking questions.”
“Too late,” I muttered.
He raised an eyebrow. “What?”
I nodded subtly down the hallway. A few students were definitely staring. Whispering and watching.
Kai followed my gaze. Then looked back at me. “…worth it.”
I rolled my eyes. But I smiled. And for once….I didn’t try to hide it.